Lost Catholic Faith

[laylow]

Are there any out there that have lost their Catholic faith? If so, did you switch to another religion, or none all together? What events lead to your loss of faith?

 

[Vonsalza]

Are there any out there that have lost their Catholic faith?

I’ll take a stab at it, even though I might not argue that I’ve completely lost the Catholic faith. But I’m certainly what some might negatively refer to as a “Cafeterian”.

If so, did you switch to another religion, or none all together?

I flirted with Orthodoxy just as much as I flirted with Catholicism when I was looking for the ancient, Apostolic Church. But since the Orthodox Church is an hour away, I go on the first sabbath of the month and the other’s I go where my wife desires (she of evangelical protestant leaning).

What events lead to your loss of faith?

My wife and I want to share a close, sexual relationship and we don’t want any more kids. So we contracept.
My local priest is, frankly, very understanding of it. But if it’s not allowed, then it’s not allowed - local priest’s sympathy notwithstanding.

If we had any more kids when we were a bit younger, we’d have certainly had a nervous breakdown or divorce or some stress-fueled major household event - no exaggeration. #2 and #3 both have issues and a fourth would have broken us in some way.

Now, my wife’s not quiiiite menopausal and we’re in a far better financial place than we were when our kids were little, but the days of chasing babies are now over. My wife’s body probably couldn’t handle another pregnancy and we’re definitely too old to chase toddlers. And in just a few more years it won’t matter anyway.

Maybe I’ll be back then

 

[Francis]

Everyone faces a dark night of the soul,but we have to depend completely on Jesus.

About St. Therese of Lisieux

She translated this desire for love by developing her relationship to Jesus Christ. She gave each day to him as a way of manifesting her love for him. When she discovered that life was not easy in the convent of Lisieux, that some of the nuns were coarse and difficult to live with, she came to the conclusion that the condition would be chronic. It was not going to go away. Therefore she had to decide how she would live within this environment. She discovered her little way: to accept that each one came ultimately from the divine artist and thus each one is loved forever by God. Therefore she would love them as best she could, a kind word, a smile, an assist when she was able. In fact, she learned in the process that there is deep down a union between love of God and love of neighbor. She wrote that the more my life is focused in Jesus Christ, the more I am able to love my Sisters.

Toward the end of her life St. Therese discovered that love could be tested in extraordinary ways. She had to go through an eighteen month period of feeling nothing but temptation against all that she believed. Perhaps there is no heaven and her life had been a foolish gesture of commitment. She had little consolation and also had to suffer from tuberculosis, which had no cure in the late nineteenth century. But St. Therese refused to abandon her life of faith, hope and love. She would accept any difficulty and any test in order to give herself to love. In the end she left this world in great peace and in love. Her story continues to attract the restless heart seeking a way of being worthwhile in our world.

 

[Shakuhachi]

I have lost confidence in the hierarchy and institution but still believe in the effectiveness of
the sacraments

 

[laylow]

Interesting. Thanks for sharing.

 

[thomasaquinas2015]

My wife and I want to share a close, sexual relationship and we don’t want any more kids. So we contracept.

My local priest is, frankly, very understanding of it. But if it’s not allowed, then it’s not allowed - local priest’s sympathy notwithstanding.

I’m curious: Do you think one can share a close, sexual relationship with their spouse without the use of contraceptions?

 

[Vonsalza]

Vonsalza:

My wife and I want to share a close, sexual relationship and we don’t want any more kids. So we contracept.

My local priest is, frankly, very understanding of it. But if it’s not allowed, then it’s not allowed - local priest’s sympathy notwithstanding.

I’m curious: Do you think one can share a close, sexual relationship with their spouse without the use of contraceptions?

Sure. Absolutely.

But then you risk additional children.

We were at a point where our marriage couldn’t handle the strain of another child. Those constraints have disappeared, but now our bodies can’t really handle another. As I said, my wife’s reproductive years draw to an end. One is on BP meds, another on anxiety meds.

 

[thomasaquinas2015]

So you have you left the Church? Would you ever consider returning? What is preventing you from not going to Mass? I mean seriously lets face it there are a lot of Catholics out there who are disobeying the Catholic Church in this regard and still go to Mass. So what’s preventing you from going? Or are you going?

 

[Vonsalza]

So you have you left the Church? Would you ever consider returning? What is preventing you from not going to Mass?

I have the benefit of my local priest being an extremely empathetic man who told me point-blank that the Church’s position on it is anachronistic and needs to change. But nonetheless the Church still bans it and therefore he’d still require my confession of it.

I consider it unfair to both myself and the Roman Church (and my priest) to maintain the situation AND attend mass, so I’ve ceased attending mass at my parish very recently. I go to the closest Orthodox Church for the first sabbath of the month (it’s something of a drive) and I go with my wife for the remainder - which is usually to my parent’s Baptist Church, interestingly… (as my wife wasn’t raised Baptist - I was).

I mean seriously lets face it there are a lot of Catholics out there who are disobeying the Catholic Church in this regard and still go to Mass. So what’s preventing you from going? Or are you going?

Frankly, I don’t think they should go. And if their kids are in Catholic school, they should pull them out.

I don’t like to half a** things. Whole a** or no a**.

 

[laylow]

So you have you left the Church? Would you ever consider returning? What is preventing you from not going to Mass? I mean seriously lets face it there are a lot of Catholics out there who are disobeying the Catholic Church in this regard and still go to Mass. So what’s preventing you from going? Or are you going?

I no longer go because I do not believe. I am open to changing my mind, but I have no idea what make that happen. It’s not a decision to believe something or not. The only decision would be to practice or not practice what you believe or not.

 

[Vonsalza]

Oh, sorry.
Thought that was aimed at me.

BTW, North Korea just announced the abolition of nukes on the peninsula!

Now, I’m sure it’s not going to last, but a man can dream, right?

 

[laylow]

Oh, sorry.

Thought that was aimed at me.

BTW, North Korea just announced the abolition of nukes on the peninsula!

Now, I’m sure it’s not going to last, but a man can dream, right?

Not sure if I would believe any announcement from them, but I am open to being presently surprised.

 

[QwertyGirl]

I was raised Catholic but I left once I moved away from home. I didn’t ever really believe, which was the problem I faced. I really appreciate a lot of the good things about the Church and the Catholic faith but on most of the moral teachings, I disagree and don’t beleive. Since the Church claims to be “right” in a kind of all or nothing way, the house of cards collapses for me. I they are wrong in one area, what other areas do they get wrong?

I don’t say this with disrespect. This is a problem I would have with just about any organized religion.

I never joined any other religions. I have been to plenty of different churches and attended a variety of services over the years. I prefer to be a free-thinker on my own and follow a set of core values I have developed for myself by pulling from a lot of places…many come from religions I have read about. I am comfortable in my own skin, so it works for me.

 

[Vonsalza]

I can understand that.

I’ve always had a problem with the post-Vatican 1 presentation of the papacy. All my life.

The Old Catholics split out after that council over the papacy, the reformation split out over the papacy, the Orthodox maintain their divide over the papacy…

It seems there’s an issue there.

I think Christ envisioned a primus rather than a supremus and it seems that a lot of traditional Catholics can’t see the difference.

 

[Thom18]

In order to lose something, I think you need to have it first.

I was poorly catechized, so I didn’t know much about what we believed. I didn’t even know that Jesus is God until a month after my reversion. Yes, it was that bad. So, with a foundation built on sand, my faith flew off after I was Confirmed.

I think poor catechesis may just be the #1 reason people leave the faith. They don’t know what the Church teaches, and they’re told by non-believers “what it teaches” (or, more accurately, what they think or want it to teach) and then have it dismantled before their eyes. Clever trick.

 

[laylow]

I think poor catechesis may just be the #1 reason people leave the faith.

Interesting. My experience was quite the opposite. I found that the more I studied it, the less plausible it became.

 

[ConfusedLucy]

For me it’s not so much a loss of faith but feeling like I don’t belong in the Catholic church. I got to a point of asking “God can I really do this alone? Or should I find a church where I can have some support?”

 

[Brettbat]

I feel like I don’t belong in the Catholic Church. Not at all. Utterly unsupported. My wife and I are utter non-entitiies at the parish. They couldn’t care less about us. There are many, many, churches out there who understand that a big part of the Christian life is community.

I’m done as of last week. Will be an easy break, because no one knows or cares who we are!

We are and always will be Christians.

We begin our search to find a real Christian community.

 

[OsculeturMeOsculo]

That seems to be more of that particular parishes fault than that of the Church.

 

[CatholicTurk]

thomasaquinas2015:

So you have you left the Church? Would you ever consider returning? What is preventing you from not going to Mass? I mean seriously lets face it there are a lot of Catholics out there who are disobeying the Catholic Church in this regard and still go to Mass. So what’s preventing you from going? Or are you going?

I no longer go because I do not believe. I am open to changing my mind, but I have no idea what make that happen. It’s not a decision to believe something or not. The only decision would be to practice or not practice what you believe or not.

There are even Saints who have gone through the agonizing experience of having dark and void times in their spiritual journey. One could argue whether it be God Himself testing us or the temptations by the Devil. Whatever the case might be, it is something you cannot deny happening. I have been there myself, and i definitely agree with you on that you don’t just believe by wanting to believe in something. It’s like you’re in love with Jenny, but not Sally. You can’t force it. But I have also learned that it’s not necessarily only about believing per se, but choosing to believe in light of what you have already found out to be true intellectually. That is why it is crucially important to study and know the Word of God. It is how a lot of Saints fought the good fight to the end. It wasn’t always as Heavenly with bright blue skies for them, either. The plan of Salvation is a big puzzle for us, yet a puzzle is a perfect whole which already exists, you just need to put it together for yourself. This notion doesn’t make the puzzle any less real because you just played with it for a while and couldn’t see it coming together, and so now it’s just nothing but bunch of broken pieces to be discarded. Try to find out the Catholic teachings already established in the Bible by the Lord Himself. When you’re overwhelmed with evidence for Catholicism, you shall come running back to the faith even stronger than before. Then, of course the cycle will go around many more times, so you will fall again, but this time you will “TRUST” which will sound something like this when you look back: “Congratulations, you’ve just upgraded to the next level”