makeup???

[Becky42]

hi guys

not sure if this post belongs here but if not plz feel free to move it!

i just have a question of the ladies (and also the men maybe).

why is it that that i (and possibly other girls) think i look hideous without makeup but my boyfriend thinks i look way better without??

it sounds like a stupid question but i am completely flawed by it! i am pretty sure i am not blind, i can see my imperfect skin!! does he not see it?!??!

is this just me or are there more like me out there?? or…is it as i have been suspecting…my boyfriend is partially blind from playing too many computer games!!!

 

[bluerose]

Twenty years ago, my husband threw a literal hissy fit when I mentioned I might wear a little makeup for our wedding… maybe even get contacts.

If you look at our wedding photos, you will see me in my big glasses and not even a trace of lipstick.

I actually look pretty good. And my husband says it’s MY face he wants to see when he wakes up in the morning, not Maybelline’s!

I think it’s called “love”.

 

[Becky42]

i bet ur just gorgeous…

i tried to slip on just the tiniest amount of foundation today…but he noticed!!! darn it!! well if it is love as you say and not the blindness that i originally suspected him of well i suppose i could deal without makeup more often than not!!! I’D rather look beautiful for his eyes rather than trying to impress the world!!

i might not give him a say on my makeup at my wedding though! i’ll wipe it off for they honeymoon! haha

 

[puzzleannie]

I think it is probably true a lot of use make makeup, clothing, hair choices based on our girlfriends than on what the men in our life really find attractive, and would be surprised if the men felt secure enough to be honest. what is the popular media-tv, music, books, movie etc. you are referencing on this forum? maybe back fence is a better location

 

[Becky42]

i think i like the idea that he likes the ‘raw’ me. even though i can never seem to believe him when he says i look beautiful and calls me a princess, it does make me feel so special that he belives it and i can tell by how he says it and how he looks into my eyes when he does say it. (gosh i am being all soppy now )
i think its cos he is the first guy i have ever been out with that is like that…something i need to get used to.
aww…he’s so sweet…i am so lucky…

 

[Sr_Sally]

Makeup is actually not all that good for your skin. The more often you wear it (and the more you wear), the more you’ll develop “imperfect” skin and the more you’ll want to wear. I say your bf is right and you should go without. Just wash regularly and wear a good lotion with sunscreen everyday. Pretty soon you’ll be used to the real (not raw) you too!

 

[kage_ar]

One question - did you wear makeup when you first met him?

 

[strngrnrth]

As long as he thinks youre beautiful, and you don’t have to wear makeup for your job or anything, why worry about it?
I had a boyfriend who used to lick his finger right after I had carefully put my makeup on and say, “Wait a minute, you have some gunk on your face,” and start smearing it. He called my cosmetics of choice “Shiny dirt.” It made me loathe him. That’s different, IMO, because he was insulting my taste and denying my right to dress as I felt comfortable. Also, I really didn’t look good then. My face was unhealthy and very doughy and I needed some help to feel dignified.
He once pointed out a woman sitting near us in a public place and said he liked the way she looked, un-made-up. i explained that she was wearig more make-up than I was. He was surprised. I had to tell him what he natural look is: not a real natural face but one painted in dull colors with extremely complex blending. I preferred brighter tones and sharper lines and that was my style.

 

[Nechasin]

I’ll start by saying I’m a guy. Beauty is about you and not about what you wear. You are you, including all the flaws that make up you. He probably sees the flaws, but he recognizes them for what they are. You. Sounds like a good guy to me.

I have the same disagreements with my wife all the time. Now the only makeup she puts on has a sunblock to protect her skin. I can’t argue with that. If a woman’s face is too perfect because of the makeup, it may be pretty, but it is not attractive because it is fake. Attraction goes beneath the outside layer. It is about the whole package. It took a long time for my wife to accept this fact.

 

[lizaanne]

I think it’s called “love”.

It’s got to be - because I dont’ get it either!!

My DH thinks I’m the most beautiful woman in the world - scrubbed up and straight out of the shower. Sorry, but I don’t get it. I think I look horrible, and the only time I will EVER leave the house without make up is to run him to work in the morning, 10 minutes away. Usually with a hat on.

~Liza

 

[Joe_5859]

why is it that that i (and possibly other girls) think i look hideous without makeup but my boyfriend thinks i look way better without??

it sounds like a stupid question but i am completely flawed by it! i am pretty sure i am not blind, i can see my imperfect skin!! does he not see it?!??!

is this just me or are there more like me out there?? or…is it as i have been suspecting…my boyfriend is partially blind from playing too many computer games!!!

My wife was the same way when we started dating. She would not go anywhere without makeup. I repeatedly told her that I thought she looked better without it (on those rare occassions that I would actually get to see her without makeup), but she would never believe me!

Now that we’re married, she doesn’t wear makeup except for special occassions. I’m not sure if it’s because she finally believes me or that she got lazy!

 

[Just_wondering]

I love love love that my boyfriend doesn’t like me in makeup. I’ve never understood why people want to cover their faces up and look like the cover girl model. I admit, I’ve been blessed with good skin, so I rarely have blemishes to cover up - just the usual puffy eyes, shadows, stuff like that. But to me, the girls on the magazine pages look so fake. I see girls with fake eyelashes and eyeliner and lipliner and lipstick and cover up and … ugh. It’s just not me.

I quite often wear lip gloss, in a similar colour to my natural lip colour. (Sometimes, when my boyfriend forgets his chapstick, he uses my lip gloss too - it’s that subtle!) I also sometimes use eyeshadow, in a lovely bronze colour that looks like my skin tone with a suntan. It brings out my eyes when I’m dressed up for an evening out. Other than that, I’m as bare as the day I was born.

If your boyfriend doesn’t like you wearing makeup, smile and feel warm inside, knowing he loves you for who you are, not what cover girl you look like.

 

[lizzy_bird]

One question - did you wear makeup when you first met him?

I think that is a good question b/c, obviously, he was attracted to you physically, intellectually, mentally, spiritually, etc. when you began dating and I’d think that if he liked the way you looked back then he’d still like it now.

Another point I’d make that my DH told me about women and make up is that he finds some women to look like ahem “street walkers” or “lady’s of the evening” when they wear too much and he wouldn’t want me looking like that.

 

[Becky42]

i dont really remember if i wore makeup when i first met him cos we met as friends and i wasnt really trying to look attractive to him cos we were just mates. i rarely leave the house without foundation and light mascara so i would have been wearing something but i find my makeup wears off during the day quickly cos i am active and when we first met we were playing in a band together and so it was hot business which meant the makeup was probably off!

just as a side note, my makeup doesnt look skanky or ‘lady of the night’ i cant remember what you called it exactly. when i wear makeup i wear a oil-free foundation, eyeliner, light mascara and bronzer or a tiny bit of blush, its not plastered on at all. i do it natural

i duno about america, but fluro makeup is in at the moment in australia and its killing me! i cant stand it and i wont wear it.

 

[cam100]

I would like to add another perspective here. I recently heard the comment “my boyfriend hates when I wear makeup, but he sure does notice the other women walking by who do wear it!” Some guys discourage their girlfriends from wearing makeup because they’re very afraid of the attention she might get from other guys. The guys actually find makeup attractive, and they know other guys do, too. So they try to keep their own girlfriend from wearing it so that she won’t get attention from other guys. I’ve seen the same thing happen with clothing, where guys try to get their girlfriends to dress down to avoid attention.

I have no idea if this situation applies to you, but it does happen with some people.

 

[lizaanne]

just as a side note, my makeup doesnt look skanky or ‘lady of the night’ i cant remember what you called it exactly. when i wear makeup i wear a oil-free foundation, eyeliner, light mascara and bronzer or a tiny bit of blush, its not plastered on at all. i do it natural

Yeah - I have to second this - I may wear make up, but we need to make a major distinction here about wearing light natural looking make up, and the “cover girl” and “lady of the night” look several posts have mentioned. Most of the time you can’t tell I’m wearing face make up - the mascara and lipstick is obvious of course, but I don’t glom it on.

~Liza

 

[kage_ar]

I would like to add another perspective here. I recently heard the comment “my boyfriend hates when I wear makeup, but he sure does notice the other women walking by who do wear it!” Some guys discourage their girlfriends from wearing makeup because they’re very afraid of the attention she might get from other guys. The guys actually find makeup attractive, and they know other guys do, too. So they try to keep their own girlfriend from wearing it so that she won’t get attention from other guys. I’ve seen the same thing happen with clothing, where guys try to get their girlfriends to dress down to avoid attention.

I have no idea if this situation applies to you, but it does happen with some people.

That was what I was thinking - the reason I asked if the OP wore makeup when she first met the BF…

 

[Becky42]

I would like to add another perspective here. I recently heard the comment “my boyfriend hates when I wear makeup, but he sure does notice the other women walking by who do wear it!” Some guys discourage their girlfriends from wearing makeup because they’re very afraid of the attention she might get from other guys. The guys actually find makeup attractive, and they know other guys do, too. So they try to keep their own girlfriend from wearing it so that she won’t get attention from other guys. I’ve seen the same thing happen with clothing, where guys try to get their girlfriends to dress down to avoid attention.

I have no idea if this situation applies to you, but it does happen with some people.

well, i see your point and i think it applies to any woman really! and it should! it is important that a woman dresses modestly so as not to attract attention from other males for the wrong reasons and so if my boyfriend is doing that (which isnt often cos i do dress modestly) then i dont mind at all, i actually thank him cos that kind of attention is unwanted by me!

i spoke to him about it again today, and he said its not that he finds my makeup unattractive, he thinks i look really pretty when i have it on, he just thinks i look most beautiful without.

he is a jelous boyfriend but not in that obsessive bad way, just in the way he wants me to act and look modest and respectable, but still beautiful. i feel the same way about him (though him wearing makeup is not usually a concern )

 

[Becky42]

Yeah - I have to second this - I may wear make up, but we need to make a major distinction here about wearing light natural looking make up, and the “cover girl” and “lady of the night” look several posts have mentioned. Most of the time you can’t tell I’m wearing face make up - the mascara and lipstick is obvious of course, but I don’t glom it on.

~Liza

ohh ur gorgeous! your right, ur makeup is really natural and you are stunning, lucky hubby!

ps - to the other comment made about ‘thats why you asked if i was wearing makeup when i first met him’…just wanted to say my boyfriend isnt that shallow to be attracted to me just for looks. he always said he found me beautiful when he first met me but thats not why he fell in love with me, that was because he like who i was, not what i looked like. its important to find someone physically attractive too!

 

[kage_ar]

he is a jelous boyfriend but not in that obsessive bad way, just in the way he wants me to act and look modest and respectable, but still beautiful. i feel the same way about him (though him wearing makeup is not usually a concern )

Jelousy is something that shows immaturity or insecurity.

You might want to take a step back and ask if this is the kind or marriage you want to be in, one where your husband is jealous?