Making Mass less intimidating

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Bill_Martin

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One thing I noticed at Mass on Ash Wednesday (in a college town) was that there were a ton of people who were obviously uncomfortable with being there. Anyone who goes to Mass regularly knows that Ash Wednesday always gets a lot of people who go only once or twice a year. I have also talked to several people who have said that they are embarrassed to go back to Mass because they aren’t sure when to stand, sit, kneel, go to Communion, etc. We can do better.

I think we should have leaflets in the pews that explain each part of the Mass; whether to stand, sit or kneel; and give the reasons why we do them. A friend of mine who got married recently did this in his wedding programs and it was tremendously beneficial. A Jewish girl next to me in the pew was fascinated by it. It definitely made things less awkward for people who were either not Catholic or hadn’t been to Mass in a very long time. I know people can mostly follow along with the missals, but most who are new don’t know that, nor do the missals explain why Catholics do what we do. A leaflet right there in the pew with short descriptions of each part of the Mass is easy to identify, easy to find, easy to read, doesn’t need to be long, and can point people to the missal.

Has your parish ever done something like this? If not, I think we should start. Maybe we can get the ball rolling here on CAF and get a few short paragraphs down. If we put one together, I’m willing to send it to my diocese for consideration/improvement. (name removed by moderator)ut from the priests and religious who frequent this forum would be great.
 
Where I am, the visitors you refer to usually take their clue as to sitting, standing, etc. by following [albeit with a very slight delay] the ordinary parishioners. As for ‘education’ - not an easy matter.
paduard.
 
One thing I noticed at Mass on Ash Wednesday (in a college town) was that there were a ton of people who were obviously uncomfortable with being there. Anyone who goes to Mass regularly knows that Ash Wednesday always gets a lot of people who go only once or twice a year. I have also talked to several people who have said that they are embarrassed to go back to Mass because they aren’t sure when to stand, sit, kneel, go to Communion, etc. We can do better.

I think we should have leaflets in the pews that explain each part of the Mass; whether to stand, sit or kneel; and give the reasons why we do them. A friend of mine who got married recently did this in his wedding programs and it was tremendously beneficial. A Jewish girl next to me in the pew was fascinated by it. It definitely made things less awkward for people who were either not Catholic or hadn’t been to Mass in a very long time. I know people can mostly follow along with the missals, but most who are new don’t know that, nor do the missals explain why Catholics do what we do. A leaflet right there in the pew with short descriptions of each part of the Mass is easy to identify, easy to find, easy to read, doesn’t need to be long, and can point people to the missal.

Has your parish ever done something like this? If not, I think we should start. Maybe we can get the ball rolling here on CAF and get a few short paragraphs down. If we put one together, I’m willing to send it to my diocese for consideration/improvement. (name removed by moderator)ut from the priests and religious who frequent this forum would be great.
My thought is that there is enough paper clutter strewn around already. Generally speaking most visitors are smart enough to figure things out for themselves. Besides, a little mystery is a good thing.

In my church, after Mass there is a sweet volunteer who faithfully goes around each pew straightening up the missals, papers and prayer leaflets. She really does not need another piece of paper to pick up off the floor.
 
Where I am, the visitors you refer to usually take their clue as to sitting, standing, etc. by following [albeit with a very slight delay] the ordinary parishioners. As for ‘education’ - not an easy matter.
paduard.
They do that here too, and while it can sort of work, I don’t like it for a few reasons.

1.) It isn’t very welcoming. It makes it seem like the visitor is butting in and trying to follow a group of people who are all “in the know”. Instead of being a part of the Mass, it feels like they are on the outside of an exclusive club with arcane rules. It would be much better if we addressed their uneasiness and gave them an easy way to be involved without being left out or feeling like they are out of place.

2.) It isn’t very spiritual. The Mass is not a game of follow the leader. There’s a reason for what we do and it should be explained. It really doesn’t need to be long. The wedding program I mentioned was just two or three sentences for each part of the Mass and sometimes a relevant scripture passage. Knowledge about these traditions allows one to think about them. It makes it a much richer experience than simply “I’m kneeling because that guy over there is kneeling”.
 
One thing I noticed at Mass on Ash Wednesday (in a college town) was that there were a ton of people who were obviously uncomfortable with being there. Anyone who goes to Mass regularly knows that Ash Wednesday always gets a lot of people who go only once or twice a year. I have also talked to several people who have said that they are embarrassed to go back to Mass because they aren’t sure when to stand, sit, kneel, go to Communion, etc. We can do better.

I think we should have leaflets in the pews that explain each part of the Mass; whether to stand, sit or kneel; and give the reasons why we do them. A friend of mine who got married recently did this in his wedding programs and it was tremendously beneficial. A Jewish girl next to me in the pew was fascinated by it. It definitely made things less awkward for people who were either not Catholic or hadn’t been to Mass in a very long time. I know people can mostly follow along with the missals, but most who are new don’t know that, nor do the missals explain why Catholics do what we do. A leaflet right there in the pew with short descriptions of each part of the Mass is easy to identify, easy to find, easy to read, doesn’t need to be long, and can point people to the missal.

Has your parish ever done something like this? If not, I think we should start. Maybe we can get the ball rolling here on CAF and get a few short paragraphs down. If we put one together, I’m willing to send it to my diocese for consideration/improvement. (name removed by moderator)ut from the priests and religious who frequent this forum would be great.
From a protestant sister; this is a good idea. OR there could be a place where, instead of a flimsy piece of paper, maybe a place where one could discreetly pick up a small brochure for a first visit. As a non-denominational protestant who has never been exposed to ANY liturgy in any formal sense, I can personally attest that I once went to a Catholic wedding and was so completely lost and trying to watch the people in the pews that I didn’t get to really even concentrate on the important bits. It was embarrassing. Perhaps I’m just “slow.” 😊
 
Bill,
Can you share some examples from the wedding program of descriptions used.
It sounds like a fabulous Idea.

Mary.
 
I think there’s a difference between the person who comes to a regular Mass on their own and the one who comes to a family event (like a funeral or wedding). In the latter, these are people who are only int he church because of that event, and it isn’t likely that the Mass is going to be a significant evangelizing opportunity.

The regular Mass, however, is an opportunity to evangelize, and I think the emphasis needs to be on experiencing the Mass, not keeping up with the rest of the congregation. At one of the first Masses I attended, the someone pulled me aside (noticing I was new) and asked my thoughts on the Mass. I said I was having a hard time keeping up. They told me not to worry about it - concentrate on the experience, not the rituals. If people are reading along and worrying about what comes next, I think they’ll lose that connection with the experience. As I’ve grown in my faith, grown in my understanding of the Mass and connected to the rituals, my experience is strengthened by those rituals - because I grew into them - I didn’t learn them by rote.

So I understand where you’re coming from, but I think there is something to be said for learning as you go along, rather than having all the instructions given to you at the door.
 
As a lifelong Catholic, I can’t relate to being “intimidated” at Mass.

That being said, I would advise any newcomer to Catholic Mass (or someone who has been away for a long time) to look for someone who looks like they know what they’re doing, and do what they do. I would also advise people to not be shy about picking up one of those missals in the pews and looking through those for the prayers.

On second thought… I CAN relate. Every time I go to a Tridentine Mass I always feel like the most ignorant man in the room. I’ve been several times, and I am completely lost. Even my convert wife does better than I do there because she can pronounce and read Latin far better than I can.

The BEST way to make Mass less intimidating is to go more often. I recommend attending at least every Sunday (and more often as needed). And to make sure that the intimidation factor is COMPLETELY put to bed; attending on Holy Days of Obligation should seal the deal.
 
I think ideally it should be clearly indicated in the missalette, with a brief explanatory section describing each gesture and why we do it. That way it would avoid additional clutter. The ushers should make the missalettes available or point them out especially to obvious newcomers.

But that would have to be taken up with the publishers. And of course some parishes (e.g. no kneelers) may do things differently.

The other thing I’ve seen done, is the cantor giving the cues to rise, sit or kneel, with his hands.
 
Besides, a little mystery is a good thing.
Very true. But it should be about what’s going on at the altar, not about “surprises.” Each parish simply does things differently than another parish. Some have baptisms, long sermons, long adlibbling, prayer intentions from the congregation, etc. I don’t think it’s a particular challenge to know when to sit, stand, or kneel as one tends to follow the crowd anyway. Besides, even priests who say the EF may instruct the crowd as to what to do.
 
As an example; when you guys talk about grabbing a “missal”… most non-liturgical protestants wouldn’t know what that is or where to find it or what it looks like. 😛
 
Bill,
Can you share some examples from the wedding program of descriptions used.
It sounds like a fabulous Idea.

Mary.
I wish I kept a copy because I can’t remember exactly. This site has brief descriptions of each part of the Mass: catholic.org/prayers/mass.php

The ones at the wedding were basically something like this but included “Please stand”, “Please sit” etc. as needed. The important thing is that it was short; it didn’t try to replace the missal, it just provided a guide for someone to follow along.
 
As an example; when you guys talk about grabbing a “missal”… most non-liturgical protestants wouldn’t know what that is or where to find it or what it looks like. 😛
Ahh…

Those would be the books that many of the Catholics are holding and reading out of during Mass. More often than not, they are found in the pews. ALSO, since the most recent ‘tweak’ of the Mass; many parishes have had handy-dandy user-friendly cheat-sheets in the pews also. 👍 VERY helpful.
 
I think we should have leaflets in the pews that explain each part of the Mass; whether to stand, sit or kneel; and give the reasons why we do them. A friend of mine who got married recently did this in his wedding programs and it was tremendously beneficial.
We did this when we got married because all but 2 of my family were Protestant. Helped people a lot.

I’ve noticed that some priests will say or motion when to sit & when to stand - others don’t. Which can be awkward. On a recent Holy Day of Obligation we did a song or reading (can’t remember which) that we had never done before. By the time I looked up from my missal I saw that the priest was sitting & about half the congregation - including me - were still standing. He never gave a word of explanation, nor was there any instruction in the missal. 🤷
 
I think there’s a difference between the person who comes to a regular Mass on their own and the one who comes to a family event (like a funeral or wedding). In the latter, these are people who are only int he church because of that event, and it isn’t likely that the Mass is going to be a significant evangelizing opportunity.

The regular Mass, however, is an opportunity to evangelize, and I think the emphasis needs to be on experiencing the Mass, not keeping up with the rest of the congregation. At one of the first Masses I attended, the someone pulled me aside (noticing I was new) and asked my thoughts on the Mass. I said I was having a hard time keeping up. They told me not to worry about it - concentrate on the experience, not the rituals. If people are reading along and worrying about what comes next, I think they’ll lose that connection with the experience. As I’ve grown in my faith, grown in my understanding of the Mass and connected to the rituals, my experience is strengthened by those rituals - because I grew into them - I didn’t learn them by rote.

So I understand where you’re coming from, but I think there is something to be said for learning as you go along, rather than having all the instructions given to you at the door.
This is exactly my point though. I agree that the focus should be on experiencing the Mass rather than trying to keep up with it, which is why I think we should make it easier to keep up. More information about what is going on reduces anxiety in unfamiliar environments. This anxiety is a big obstacle to people coming to Mass in my experience.
 
As an example; when you guys talk about grabbing a “missal”… most non-liturgical protestants wouldn’t know what that is or where to find it or what it looks like. 😛
That’s interesting, because each time I attended a Protestant event, the last being a memorial for my niece, they were always ready with the handouts, which followed the program to the letter, including the hymns that would be played.

In my opinion, most of the missalettes you find in the pews are totally disorganized, don’t even provide cross-references that one can follow in a methodical manner. Some have the EP prayers in front, readings in another section, with antiphons scattered around somewhere. It’s hard to know, for example at a Spanish Mass, whether the priest is adlibbing or not. As long as parishes are paying good money for those disposable missalettes, I suggest a better and more unified way of following them from beginning to end. Not everyone is familiar with the flow of the Mass. Some of the options and allowances can throw some people off as well.
 
One thing I noticed at Mass on Ash Wednesday (in a college town) was that there were a ton of people who were obviously uncomfortable with being there. Anyone who goes to Mass regularly knows that Ash Wednesday always gets a lot of people who go only once or twice a year. I have also talked to several people who have said that they are embarrassed to go back to Mass because they aren’t sure when to stand, sit, kneel, go to Communion, etc. We can do better.
I can understand a non-Catholic being uncomfortable and unfamiliar with the liturgy, but why would they be at a Catholic Ash Wednesday mass?

Those in that setting were most likely Catholics who haven’t been for awhile, and I could see that they’d be embarrassed but I don’t think it’s because they don’t know when to sit/stand/kneel. It’s probably more that they’ve been away for a long time and are nervous about what might have changed since they’ve last attended. I’ve noticed I tend to be slightly anxious when I attend a Catholic mass at an unfamiliar parish. Some have the tv monitors guiding prayer responses, but all have a missalette.

Still, if they are receiving the Eucharist they have been through enough catechesis to have received the basic movements required, and they would know that we have the missalettes in the pew to thumb through either before or during the mass. Yes, they are not consistent in presentation, but in content, they are. The information anyone needs to understand what is happening is there.

Thing is there are many active Catholics who rarely pick up the missalette and honestly, they miss out on some great meditations and instruction opportunities. I don’t think we need to add more papers to the pews.
 
It may be a word thing; we call the pamphlets handed out, or placed on a table for each service a “Bulletin.” Would that be the same as a “Missalette?”
 
I think ideally it should be clearly indicated in the missalette, with a brief explanatory section describing each gesture and why we do it. That way it would avoid additional clutter. The ushers should make the missalettes available or point them out especially to obvious newcomers.

But that would have to be taken up with the publishers. And of course some parishes (e.g. no kneelers) may do things differently.

****The other thing I’ve seen done, is the cantor giving the cues to rise, sit or kneel, with his hands./****QUOTE]

\Our Deacons do this. We have a Deacon present at every Mass.
 
Those in that setting were most likely Catholics who haven’t been for awhile,
Not necessarily. We always have a few non-Catholics who attend Ash Wednesday as well as Easter and Christmas vigils. A couple are Protestant ministers!
 
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