"Mama, your hair looks like a rooster." Thanks honey, I love you too

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Thank you so much for this thread!! It was just what I needed to see today.

I don’t have children of my own, so I can’t add to the funny stories, but they sure are giving me a little taste of what to expect. 🙂
 
but my 4yr old joined us up north for a funeral last fall, and when he met his grandfather’s brother for the first time his first words were “Hi Uncle Kevin, it’s nice to meet you…hey, You have a circle-head just like Grampy!” (both of them have round, relatively bald heads, but my FIL aka, Grampy, doesn’t like to admit it…he’s a combover victim…LOL) – Neither of them knew quite what to say to that one…a “circle head” – first time I’d heard that one.

There was another time, and this one may be Too much info for some, it’s feminine in nature…so if that’s gonna be rough, just click the back button now…

When we moved into our new house, he was fascinated with the ceiling fans in every room…we talked about the pull strings, etc, and how either the string or the lever on the wall controlled the fan, etc…

One day he walked into the bathroom as I was standing up – it was “that time” for me, and he took one look at me, gasped, and asked “Mommy, is that your pullstring!!!”

uhhhhh…,.,…:eek:
 
My husband’s little cousin was about three when his great aunt, Shirley, who lived out of state most of the year, died unexpectedly. His parents are wonderful people and did the best they could to explain what had happened. They thought they had given him a good explanation until the neighbor, named Shirley, who’s a close friend walked in. Zach walked right up to her, took a close look, and then looked back to his parents confused. He said, “What does dead mean?”

Zach wasn’t done providing comic relief for the family then. After the funeral (held at the funeral home) the family was gathered as they brought out the casket to the herse. Zach, a big fan of fire trucks and anything with wheels (he played with them constantly and was almost obsessive about his toy fire trucks) had never seen a herse. Everyone was crying, but when he saw the herse, his eyes got huge and he yelled out, “Whoa! Cool!” I lost my composure when I thought of him wanting to start a toy herse collection.

Children are such a blessing!
 
My husband told me this story about mass at his parish. It was Christmas mass and it was packed. It was hot and crowded and seemed to go on forever. Finally, after communion there was a brief period of silence as the choir had finished their caroles. Then a little boy yelled out “Mommy can we go home when Father is finished doing the dishes?”
The whole church just cracked up in laughter.
 
Mary's Lamb:
My husband told me this story about mass at his parish. It was Christmas mass and it was packed. It was hot and crowded and seemed to go on forever. Finally, after communion there was a brief period of silence as the choir had finished their caroles. Then a little boy yelled out “Mommy can we go home when Father is finished doing the dishes?”
The whole church just cracked up in laughter.
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:clapping: Yeah, then maybe we can invite him for lunch so that he can do our dishes too.
 
We’ve got to try to see the positive side to every supposed insult, right? My daughter turned to leave and said, “Mom, your not that interesting to watch”. Instead of feeling insulted I thought, “Wow, that means that watching me work has some entertainment value.” Who would have thunk it.
 
We were driving home form Sunday Mass and my 3 year old’s behavior was awful, I mean really bad.

My husband and I drove home in silence and didn’t say anything to her. As we got closer to home she would say “Am I getting a spanking?” “Mommy-Daddy am I getting a spanking???” And then she got louder and louder, agonizing saying “I don’t want a spanking”. Now, my husband and I aren’t spankers but we decided that if that would instill some fear then we wouldn’t correct her. Let her THINK she would get one (but not really do it). Well we were almost home and we passed another Catholic Church. Then she REALLY starts crying. She sat in the back seat and started…

“Hail Mary, Full of Grace, the Lord is with you…”

Of course we didn’t give a spanking. But I am sure she thought it was her prayer that stopped it.
 
The other night at dinner my 4yr old son pointed out
“Mommy, you have a pimple right there”

To which my loving husband replied, “Son, it’s not really polite to point out pimples on people; how about instead, you tell mommy how beautiful she is?”

thinking…thinking…thinking

“Mommy, you sure do look beautiful with that pimple”
 
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leaner:
The other night at dinner my 4yr old son pointed out
“Mommy, you have a pimple right there”

To which my loving husband replied, “Son, it’s not really polite to point out pimples on people; how about instead, you tell mommy how beautiful she is?”

thinking…thinking…thinking

“Mommy, you sure do look beautiful with that pimple”
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Very cute! 😃 :rotfl:
 
DH took the kids camping, and it stormed! He and the youngest had fallen asleep in the tent while watching a DVD on the portable DVD player they had with, but the 5 yr old was trying to see the movie. She slugged DH in the shoulder waking him up and said, “Daddy! You’re snoring louder then the thunder!”

Several day latter at the dinner table DH told her to “Take a chill pill” She looked up at him and said,“But Daddy, I took one this morning.” He about laughed milk out his nose, and I told DD that it was probaby her vitaman she took.
 
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StratusRose:
Once when she picked my up from day care I ran up to her to hug her and at the time I was at eye level with her crotch, and I looked up at her and said really loud, “Mommy, your dress stinks!”
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HAHAHAHAHA!!! :rotfl: I laughed sooo hard.

Eamon
 
Around the time my son turned 4 he kept telling me that my “tummy was sticking out, especially when you sit down…” The fact that his sister had just turned two, made me feel really great about my baby belly, especially since I had finally gotten down to an acceptable size, not the four I was in before kids, but a 7 was ok with me… I tried not to let it make me feel bad, since my tummy is much like the typical deflated baloon of a mother of 3.

He had been telling me this off and On for several months. While we were eating at Olive GArden my son said “Mommy all of your food goes to your big tummy!” He got out of his chair, feeling the need to come show me where it goes. My husband and I cracked up when he walked up and pointed to my size 34 F breasts and said “See I told you ALL of your food goes to that big part of your tummy!” Then he proceded to tell everyone sitting at the Table that “Mommy doesn’t nurse the baby anymore!” He has a very loud voice. My dad and brother were with us, so that was lovely dinner conversation.
 
Way to funny.
Kids do come up with some originals.
Here are some of mine.

Two days ago at dinner time (ds is 6 here), we were talking about our car accident the week before and the guy that hit us was Mark. So my Dad says to Seth do you know Mark from the bible. To this Seth says “Yes, he was Jesus’s dapostle (disciple + apostle)”
Cute. Actually he could not remember the right word.
These are when ds was almost 2.

One morning ds & self were having breakfast and the radio is on and they announce that the Leafs (Toronto hockey team) lost the hockey game the night before, since ds has learnt to say “Go Leafs Go” I told him they lost. He points to the plants on the floor and says “No Mummy, leafs there”

We say the Grace before meals and then I will say “Thank you Jesus for all this food”

Ds says “No, Thank you Mummy”

On Mother’s day we were going to my aunt’s (aka Aunty Birdie) place for lunch so I said to ds “We are going to Aunty Birdie’s house” he says to me “birdie fly in the sky”
This was during Lent a couple months before ds turned 3.

We had been reading ds’s childrens bible with stories about Holy Week. Then while we were watching a passion play (musical) on video, that My sister & I had acted in 12 years earlier. When we reach the part of the Last Supper, ds says “Jesus will now wash the toes?” that really made me laugh, that he is actually understanding a bit from our readings. However at the end of the video he says, “Mummy & Aunty were there with Jesus.” So had to work on explaining that it happened a

long time ago. And Mummy was just acting in the play. He loved the part where Jesus came into the church on a donkeys back (Palm Sunday). Though he did not like the soldiers at the crucifixion scenes. And was very touched when Veronica wipes Jesus’s face. And was happy at the resurrection scene.
 
This is a continuation -had to create separate post

This is a month before ds turned 3

In the morning while we got ready for our day, ds and self watched a bit of the live transmission of the Queen Mother’s funeral and I explained to him about the coffin, flowers, crown, flag, soldiers, Princes in procession, …
He turns round and says to me, “Where is the little Queen?” I guess to him if that is the Queen Mother there must be a baby too. He was also very amused that Queen Mother and I have the same birthday.

What would you say?
One nite after our nite prayers, bible reading - laying in bed, ds is asking about everyones birthdays since we are counting down to his. Then he says when is Jesus’ birthday? no problem, Christmas day/December 25th. Next, When is Jesus’s Daddy’s/God’s birthday? Yikes, got me, however, I came back with, God created the world and everything and everyone, so we must thank him everyday, so I think everyday is special and like his birthday.
A week before ds turned 3

We had a not quite funny, more embarassing moment on Sunday. DS & self are at the Egypt pavillion at Carassauga (international festival in Mississauga) having dinner and watching a belly dancing performance. DS is totally enjoying the music and show. When all of a sudden he points and says loudly

“Mommy, that man is baldy like Daddy” Look at the next table and there is a family and the father is clean shaven (like dh). Yikes! I did apologize and then told ds he must not

say things like that as it may hurt people.
At 3

Ds has always loved putting the envelope in the basket as well as loose change.

He even will remind me to take the envelope before we leave home.

However last Sunday he says “Mummy, why do we give Jesus money?”

Well I did explain so that they can pay hydro, gas, maintenance in the church.

As well as the priests have to be paid so they can buy their food, clothes…

DS was being really funny and I said “You crack me up” and he says “Are you an egg, Mom”. Guess he thinks only eggs can be cracked.
 
I love this thread…we can probably keep it going indefinately…something strange comes out of one of my three girls mouths on a daily basis!

We went to Sonic and my four year old received spanish to English translation cards in her child’s meal. We were driving home and from the backseat I hear my little darling say…

“These cards are in stupid Dam Spanish”
 
My 7 year old said, “Mommy, you don’t have wrinkles; you have crinkles.” I guess those are precursors to wrinkles. May God always keep me crinkled.
 
When I was in fourth grade I brought home my report card. I always got straight A’s, so when my mom got home she couldn’t figure out why my dad was berating me over my grades. He handed her the card and sure enough there were all A’s on it. Still confused, he told her to turn it over. On the back under the behavior marks I had all S’s (satisfactory) except one. I got a U (unsatisfactory) because I talked too much. Well, my mother, trying to quell my tears, says, “Honey as long as you bring home all A’s you can talk as much as you want.”

Well, you can probably guess what happened next…

The next time I was called down for talking I told the teacher exactly what my mom told me! Guess who brought home a B on the next report card!!
 
One day, shopping in Wal-Mart with my mother and kids, oldest DD asks (rather loudly and bluntly), “What is a tampon?”. My mother then looks at me with a vindictive smile and said “Well, Mommy?” I could almost hear her thinking “Paybacks, yes!!” 😉

Just loved it when my 5 yo son burst into my room while I was getting changed. I tried to cover as soon as possible, but not before I heard the eeeeewwwww and he fled the room. :o Nothing like boosting the old self esteem, eh?

When my son was real little, he couldn’t pronounce truck properly. It came out like the f word. We were looking at bikes for one of his sister’s birthdays and I guess he was getting bored, because he started chanting louder and louder "I wanna fk, I wanna fk! I must have turned 6 shades of red before I finally got him quieted down. :eek:

My youngest daughter, 2, loves to sing. Quite often, during mass, the music will stop…but she won’t!! And she really sings too! 😃
 
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Murphster:
These are all totally funny.

I am one of nine kids, and once when I was about four years old and the one causing the ruckus during mass (it was supposedly after communion, when everyone was silent and before the priest stands up), my mother picked me up and slung me on her hip as she began walking out of the pew. I started screaming, “PLEASE DON’T BEAT ME, MAMMY!”

My mother never laid a hand on me in her life, and she looked at me, horrified, as she made her way out to the gathering space.
Even my father never spanked us more than a light tap on the bottom, so to this day I don’t know where that comment came from, though I have heard the story plenty of times 🙂
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We are expecting our first little one in a few months, so I can’t wait until we get the cute comments. Growing up as the oldest of 12, I had a chance to hear lots of cute things. One thing that I only vaguely remember was something that I did-- I was just a little more than 2 years old. We were at Mass one Sunday morning, and, of course during the quiet time after Communion but before the closing prayer, the gentleman sitting behind us, a long-time family friend, started to tug on my tiny purse. I turned around and said what I thought my mom would have said:

“Terry, just what in the H*** do you think you’re doing?”

I haven’t been teased about it lately, but I have a feeling it will come up in conversation when our little ones say cute things…
 
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