marriage

[robert_chacon]

OP, I think you must ask yourself what it means to be Catholic? While the tone of some of the responses was more technical and clinical, I think they are simply explaining the truth of the matter.

I simply want to say God bless you for just considering being married in the Church, and wanting to explore the meaning of your Catholicism at this point. However, as the rest of the posters have noted, the Church is clear about Her teaching on marriage. Society has reduced marriage to a “feeling” two people have about each other. Feelings are only a part of the decision to get married in the Church. Its about a relationship two people have with each other AND with God. At the very least a sacramental marriage involves three people. And if there are children then even more. But your questions demonstrate a very “cultural” understanding of Catholicism and nothing of your own relationship with Him.

This is not meant to be criticism. It is simply meant to understand the point of view of the posters responding to you. Your questions demonstrate a lack of understanding of the underlying Gospel message of marriage and family. Instead your approach is one of technical formalities and procedures.

If you are truly serious about the sacraments whether marriage is in your future, then you have to start with prayer to ask the Holy Spirit for guidance and then go straight to see a priest or other spiritual director. God creates us with a specific gender. Only in very very rare cases as the poster noted is there an actual genetic confusion. For whatever ever reason some people feel attracted to the opposite sex and others feel like they are the opposite sex. God did not create that. Science isnt sure how it happens but the Church is clear in teaching that we are born either a men or women, not homosexual, bisexual or transgender. A relationship with Christ may not alter your “feelings” but He will help you live out the life He intended for you with peace and joy! Seek Him before you seek anything else. You can start that right now with a prayer, and then by visiting your priest, going to confession and returning to the sacraments.

I pray this is what you do and that you find peace in who you are! God bless you for coming here!

 

[PaulfromIowa]

the truth is i havent been to church for many years and the question was a hypothetical one really to see what the reaction would be.
i attended church and went to a catholic school. my parents are both catholic

i do still consider myself to be catholic but am unsure about what reaction i would receive if i ever went back to church.

Of course you should return to Church. Christ calls all to him. I cannot say what reaction some people in a particular parish might have to a transsexual person. However, what people think is not important. We go to Church to encounter God, not people.

 

[1ke]

Child bearing is relevant when it comes to any marriage.

There are numerous reasons that the OP cannot marry. Sterility is not one of them.

Can. 1084 §3. Sterility neither prohibits nor nullifies marriage

 

[1ke]

if the baptismal record is not required for marriage then it is irrelevant as the certificate of birth confirms my name and gender.

The baptismal record is required. It is not irrelevant.

interesting point you make about the sacraments tho as i was kind of assuming that i would not be able to take communion anyway.

God is loving and merciful. He wants all his children in his Kingdom. While you have serious difficulties, and should speak to a priest, there is nothing that cannot be forgiven. As a chaste, single person yes you can be reconciled with the Church and resume the sacramental life.

 

[anonymouse42]

I still would like to get married but wish to remain a catholic.
i would also like to receive communion if i do go back to church.
would it make any difference if i were to ask for permission from the church to get married in a registry office?

once married would i be able to go to church?

 

[1ke]

I still would like to get married but wish to remain a catholic.
i would also like to receive communion if i do go back to church.

I am very sorry. I know this is difficult for you. Talk to your local Catholic pastor. It is not within the power of the Church to marry you given your circumstances.

would it make any difference if i were to ask for permission from the church to get married in a registry office?

No such permission can be given.

once married would i be able to go to church?

Again, make an appointment with your local Catholic pastor for spiritual counseling on your sexuality issues and your desire to return to the Sacraments.

 

[anonymouse42]

Just a quick update

I went to see my priest and it is good news. as my father was also transsexual and had surgery many years ago it appears that my condition is recognized as a genetic medical condition and as such permission has finally been granted for me to get married in church.

thanks all for your help/

 

[Maximilan_Kolbe]

Just a quick update

I went to see my priest and it is good news. as my father was also transsexual and had surgery many years ago it appears that my condition is recognized as a genetic medical condition and as such permission has finally been granted for me to get married in church.

thanks all for your help/

Uh huh. Genetic transexuality.

I guess that’s where I got my knee surgeries from.

 

[E_7]

Just a quick update

I went to see my priest and it is good news. as my father was also transsexual and had surgery many years ago it appears that my condition is recognized as a genetic medical condition and as such permission has finally been granted for me to get married in church.

thanks all for your help/

Ok, this thread was from 3 years ago, and you finally gave an update. I agree with all 1ke posts in this thread. And I imagine that you, born man, are talking about permission granted to marry a woman, right?

 

[anonymouse42]

Ok, this thread was from 3 years ago, and you finally gave an update. I agree with all 1ke posts in this thread. And I imagine that you, born man, are talking about permission granted to marry a woman, right?

no to marry a man would be wrong

i am marrying the love of my life finally as my priest has agreed that i am a woman.

 

[Rau]

I live in the uk

the problem i can see is that under uk law the birth certificate is changed to female and to complicate things under uk law it is unlawful due to the gender recognition act 2004 to ask if someone was born with a different gender than that presented on the birth certificate (disclosure)
therefore if a man and woman present the correct birth certificates on what grounds could the marriage be refused without breaking the law.

Perhaps if birth certificates can be changed in this way, the biological sex ought to be distinguished from the “adopted” gender.

 

[Rau]

…Marriage has to be able to be consummated, and both parties, to my knowledge, have to be open to and able to create life.

Partially true. One can be sterile and still marry, I believe.

 

[Rau]

Lying is NOT an option for a true Marriage. But OP seems to present that she is trying to hide the truth, I was trying to show OP that you can try to get around the rules, but that would be a serious sin and it wouldn’t change the fact that it would be an invalid marriage.

Child bearing is relevant when it comes to any marriage. There are many reasons why OP cannot be Married in the Church, and this is one of them. Marriage, no matter how late in life has to be able to be open to life, it is part of the requirements. As a former Man, I assume that she has had removal of her sexual reproductive organs, and cannot be open to life. I don’t think many people acknowledge this rule, which is why I pointed it out. REF to CCC Part 2, Article 7, V. The Goods and Requirements of Conjugal Love #1643

A man marrying needs to be capable of consummating the marriage. The potential for pregnancy to occur, by virtue of sterility affecting either party, is not relevant AFAIK.

 

[anonymouse42]

Partially true. One can be sterile and still marry, I believe.

well i am of course sterile but as i have already created life (four times) that should put me in the good catholic category as far as that goes

 

[E_7]

no to marry a man would be wrong

i am marrying the love of my life finally as my priest has agreed that i am a woman.

But I thought you were born man I’m confused. Why would a man marry a man in the Catholic Church and not be wrong?

 

[Rau]

Just a quick update

I went to see my priest and it is good news. as my father was also transsexual and had surgery many years ago it appears that my condition is recognized as a genetic medical condition and as such permission has finally been granted for me to get married in church.

thanks all for your help/

If you mean permission for you (a man) to marry a man - I don’t think so. If you are incapable of engaging in a marital act with a woman - I don’t think so.

 

[anonymouse42]

But I thought you were born man I’m confused. Why would a man marry a man in the Catholic Church and not be wrong?

try and keep up

i may have been born a man but due to genetic transsexualism passed down from my father who changed gender the my priest has decided that i am able to get married to a man under the inherited medical condition rules.therefore my acquired gender is in fact classed as my true gender as appears on my birth certificate ie female

 

[Rau]

heres my problem

i am transexual and because of the change to my birth certificate (now says female)
i can only legally marry a man.
as i am also catholic is it possible for me to marry in church?

BTW - SSM exists in the UK since March 2014. So regardless of your birth certificate, you and a partner of either sex can obtain a marriage licence.

The Catholic Church accepts your sex as per your baptismal certificate. It only recognises marriage between a man and a woman.

 

[1ke]

i am able to get married to a man under the inherited medical condition rules.

There is no such thing.

 

[Rau]

try and keep up

i may have been born a man but due to genetic transsexualism passed down from my father who changed gender the my priest has decided that i am able to get married to a man under the inherited medical condition rules.therefore my acquired gender is in fact classed as my true gender as appears on my birth certificate ie female

Pull the other one.