Mass Dress Code

[CB_Catholic]

Consider this before we judge on dress.

First, our judgment on what is appropriate may or may not be appropriate. If we are too scrupulous on this, then we need to change. If we are correct that something is appropriate…

Second, the person may or may not have been able to dress better. If they are poor, traveling and away from better clothes, on the way to work, then they should be applauded for their courage of coming to Mass the best they can. However, it is possible that some people really do not understand what Mass is, or have a proper sense of modesty. Even then…

Third, we must consider that we are all on a spiritual journey. One woman’s lack of modest, or one man’s lack of faith in the miracle of the Mass, or any sin that we take into the sanctuary, is not for us to judge. Early, we confess our sinfulness publically and before we receive the Holy Sacrament we openly admit, " Lord, I am not worthy that you should come under my roof." Even taking the worse case scenario of dress indicating some sin, which it might well do in some cases, our reaction should be the same as it is to any of our other *fellow *sinners, love and acceptance. I assure you, there are far worse sins in the hearts that we cannot see than that shorts hem or that AC/DC tee shirt.

Yes, during the Confetior, we ask our brothers and sisters to pray for us to the Lord our God. So do we pray for these people or judge them? And do we remember we need prayers too? This is a perfect time to take any and all things that bother us when we go to Mass and put them in the hands of God by our prayers and those of our fellow Christians.

 

[Kal2012]

Yes, I agree that we talk about this topic too much. However, I think we talk about it because we struggle with ‘worldly’ attitudes being brought into the church. (If someone can think of a better way to say it or a different idea of why, then share…)

For me, it’s because I’m struggle to raise a man in this culture and men are very visual. I also think that the culture is too causal and people have forgotten that as they grow up, they are role models for the younger people coming along behind them. Nobody exists in a vacuum. We can’t just do “whatever” and expect that there will be no consequences to our actions, regardless of how trivial they seem at the time. That’s why I was thrilled to see one of our local parishes post this “gentle” reminder to parishioners.

There are specific underlying reasons why people get impassioned about this issue. I’ve shared my reasoning. I hope that other people will share their reasoning as well. I think the “why” is the important part of the conversation.

People focus on the jeans and the short tops/skirts because they are symbols of a culture that often works against Catholics/Christians. If we can’t change the culture, then we can, at least, strive to have higher standards in the church (in our family, etc) than the culture and “dress in our Sunday best.” (whatever that may be in our specific area of the world/economic circumstances)

 

[27lw]

Yes, I agree that we talk about this topic too much. However, I think we talk about it because we struggle with ‘worldly’ attitudes being brought into the church. (If someone can think of a better way to say it or a different idea of why, then share…)

For me, it’s because I’m struggle to raise a man in this culture and men are very visual. I also think that the culture is too causal and people have forgotten that as they grow up, they are role models for the younger people coming along behind them. Nobody exists in a vacuum. We can’t just do “whatever” and expect that there will be no consequences to our actions, regardless of how trivial they seem at the time. That’s why I was thrilled to see one of our local parishes post this “gentle” reminder to parishioners.

There are specific underlying reasons why people get impassioned about this issue. I’ve shared my reasoning. I hope that other people will share their reasoning as well. I think the “why” is the important part of the conversation.

**People focus on the jeans and the short tops/skirts because they are symbols of a culture that often works against Catholics/Christians. If we can’t change the culture, then we can, at least, strive to have higher standards in the church (in our family, etc) than the culture and “dress in our Sunday best.” ** (whatever that may be in our specific area of the world/economic circumstances)

Wow - - you said this really well.
I think everyone agrees that there are some people who literally cannot afford
clothes other than jeans / very casual clothes. I don’t think anyone has a problem with them. I think the folks who get under my skin are the people who apparently have money to buy new clothes, but obviously choose to wear clothes to Mass that show a lot of skin. (halter tops, short shorts, etc.). I see people week in and week out, who don’t seem to understand that they are showing respect (or lack of it) by the way they dress. I think it’s great that the original post is highlighting a priest trying to gently enlighten people. : )

 

[Phemie]

Wow - - you said this really well.
I think everyone agrees that there are some people who literally cannot afford
clothes other than jeans / very casual clothes. I don’t think anyone has a problem with them. I think the folks who get under my skin are the people who apparently have money to buy new clothes, but obviously choose to wear clothes to Mass that show a lot of skin. (halter tops, short shorts, etc.). I see people week in and week out, who don’t seem to understand that they are showing respect (or lack of it) by the way they dress. I think it’s great that the original post is highlighting a priest trying to gently enlighten people. : )

I shake my head often at what moms and godmothers opt to wear at the babies’ Baptism. I know that sometimes Fr. just rolls his eyes. I’m sure if they were attending their friend’s wedding they wouldn’t dress like that but Sunday Mass…

 

[Memaw]

God never rejects people based on how they dress.

Never.

Are you sure about that? Depends on how and why they are dressed. Why do you think Our Lady said at Fatima that “Fashions will be introduced that will OFFEND my son greatly!” Her words NOT mine. God Bless, Memaw

 

[Memaw]

Needed a line in there for the guys: it would be nice if your pants actually came up over your bum.

Good advice. I wonder how it was received?

Probably not very well according to some of the posts here, God Bless, Memaw

 

[Memaw]

Our diocese has all the parishes print out a dress code reminder at the beginning of summer, neck to knees for ladies and nice slacks and shirt for gents.

Guess I’m not the only ‘prude’ in the world! God Bless, Memaw

 

[Memaw]

My Parish prints a very similar reminder in the bulletin.

Great!!, God Bless, Memaw

 

[Memaw]

I really support most of the ideas here about dressing respectfully at Mass.

A note of caution though: a number of years ago I was with a number of women who lived in an marginally impoverished area. One said. regretfully, that she never went to church because people dressed up so much she felt out of place. The best she had were jeans, sweatshirt, a skirt that was too short, etc. You get the drift. Perhaps some of the catechesis needs to cover these areas also.

Thrift stores are a wonderful place to get nice, respectful clothes very low priced. Maybe a little help for her from someone would be the thing to do. God Bless, Memaw

 

[Memaw]

I am saying that any kind of clothing, long pants or shorts, t shirt or tank top, golf shirt and v-neck, cutoffs or khakis, are OK for golf and I suspect the lord finds it OK (even if we humans don’t) if I go to church in a torn t-shirt because all he wants me to do is worship him.

Don’t you think HE would want us to treat HIS place of Worship with utmost respect in many ways. What makes us think HE doesn’t care. I bet everyone on here can afford to dress nicely, no torn shirts etc. He may be glad were there, (He knows our hearts,) but I’m sure he knows at times we could do better. God Bless, Memaw

 

[Memaw]

Don’t you think that has more to do with things like shorts that don’t have much too them (I have underwear that has more coverage), low cut things, see through blouses. For the guys, pants that show their underwear. To me it has more to do with modesty. Didn’t she also say that more people go to hell for sins of the flesh then any other kind? I highly doubt that she was talking about jeans or t-shirts.

Did I mention jeans? I don’t think I was the first one to raise the jeans subject. I did say tight fitting jeans, or anything else for that matter that’s skin tight should be a NO,NO.( In my humble opinion!) If I’m allowed to have one. God Bless, Memaw

 

[Memaw]

Simply because of people like you judging me Some people get so distracted that they can’t concentrate however that should not be my problem, it should be theirs. I’m just saying that sometimes there is a good reason and we are not to be judging so harshly. Are you sure that our Blessed Mother was talking about jeans? (I’m not talking about tight jeans…many are not tight). I’m talking modest and clean.

I actually think Christ is much more worried about how holy we are in the inside. If we are serving our neighbors in love and not judging so harshly lest we be judged by the same brush. If you can show me a place where the Church says no jeans then I might take your advice. However even the Vatican says jeans and sandals are fine. Even the gentle reminder that you posted from Fr. Ben says nothing about jeans.

OH so your worried more about “people like me” judging you, Isn’t that being distracted? How do you know they are being distracted? Isn’t that a bit judgmental? Again, I didn’t bring up the jeans issue, you did. God Bless, Memaw

 

[Memaw]

Good for you.
If you believe that God’s love hinges on your outfit, I can’t speak to that. I guess people in the rainforest can’t go to Mass.
But if what I have is mostly jeans…it doesn’t mean that I or anyone else unworthily attends Mass or unworthily receives communion. I’m not making excuses for my behavior.
YOU are condemning the actions of others. It’s not up to you. And if you want to be there on the last day saying “I told you so”…???
Really? Good luck with that.

Silly statement, God’s Love never 'hinges" on anything I do, but my love for Him does hinge on everything I do. So now we throw the rain forest in there too. I’m not "condemning anything, (your words not mine). God Bless, Memaw

 

[Memaw]

Better still, we should not worry about setting an example at all. We should simply wear what we feel is respectful and appropriate and not concern ourselves with what others wear, or with setting an example for others. We shouldn’t hold ourselves up as something to be emulated by others.

Sounds like the name of the game today. I always thought we were supposed to be a good example to others, especially to younger folks. Isn’t that what the Church teaches?? I don’t think that’s ’ holding ourselves up to be emulated by others’. God Bless, Memaw

 

[Memaw]

You haven’t condemned or judged anyone? Somehow the evidence seems to show otherwise…unless you didn’t mean what you said…

God Bless!

Nope I haven’t, You did the bold lettering and underlining. And took them out of context. God Bless, memaw

 

[Memaw]

Which Church teaching states that one should not wear jeans to Mass?

Where did I say one can’t wear jeans to Mass?? I did say tight fitting jeans or any kind of tight fitting clothing. What post?? I personally don’t, but that’s “my opinion.” Others seem to be worried about the jeans thing. WHY??? God Bless, Memaw

 

[Memaw]

Some, if not much of what you said is merely your opinion, and not objective truth. And yes, it does come across as being quite judgmental of those whose dress for Mass is not appropriate as determined by your opinion.

Is this your opinion? God Bless, Memaw

 

[jmcrae]

God doesn’t care what you look like or how you dress as long as you worship. The apostles were not the best dressed of men, scraggly guys wrapped in toga sheets.

Where does the idea come from that the Apostles dressed in “toga sheets” or that they were “scraggly”?

Jesus wore expensive, beautiful clothing (the seamless garment that the soldiers gambled for at His crucifixion, for example) - there is nothing to indicate that His Apostles didn’t do likewise.

 

[Memaw]

I think it’s a perception problem. You don’t perceive it as being judgemental or condemning–right? But other’s do especially when you post things that the Church has not said…about jeans. In your posts you talk about how other’s don’t care enough to dress nice. Is that not an assumption? How can you honestly know? You really can’t. For example…you might look at me in my jeans and assume that it is because I don’t care enough to dress “nice”–on something even the Vatican lets you wear. You think I’m not being respectful–at least from what you have said in your posts quoted above. You would never know that I have had the rug pulled out from under me from a very devistating personal issue that I don’t want to/can’t discuss. You would not know that I am in such a deep depression that I am hanging onto Christ with all my might. No one can tell my heart by looking. Do you honestly think that Christ would condemn me for picking myself up enough to get to Mass on Sat and Sunday. Which if you have ever been in a deep depression–it is almost impossible to do anything.

You have deemed jeans to be disrespectful but the Church has not.

Also…I am going to assume you don’t think asking me whatever is my problem is rude…however I perceive it as such. It does make me wonder why you bother to put “God Bless” after that…

Yes…it is true that you think that jeans are disrespectul however it’s not necessarily true that they are. So…yes the truth does speak for itself.

Why are you so hung up on jeans. I have never said anything against them except tight fitting ones. And IN my opinion, I don’t think many are very concerned about what they wear to Mass. That’s my opinion… Am I not allowed to have one??? I personally think we have lost respect for Mass in many ways. talking loudly in Church, laughing. cell phones ringing, chewing gum, etc. They say that most Catholics no longer believe in the Real Presence of Our Lord in the Eucharist !! Maybe that’s why. One of our priests gave several good, strong, homilies on how to dress for Mass, and it wasn’t long before the people responded and started to take more care in how they dressed for Mass. It does work if the people are taught properly. Making all kinds of excuses doesn’t change a thing. God Bless, Memaw

 

[cheezey]

I wouldn’t call your wardrobe immodest. I have worn everything from baggy athletic pants with a sweater to a nice skirt and blouse to Mass. The pants I will wear to daily Mass. For awhile I wore sneakers because I kept tripping or slipping on my dress shoes. I am usually one of the better dressed people at Mass.

Of course I won’t mention the time I accidentally wore my pajamas in the Chapel. Fortunately I had a maxi skirt on over it.

I don’t think my jeans and sneakers were immodest, either. Just not my preference for Him, though, ultimately, they are better than nothing. So to speak…

Makes one wonder just how many people would be in line to throw Jesus out of His Church.

As far as wearing sandals to Mass, should we throw the Priest, along with everyone else, out if they are wearing sandals?

Some Priests and some Brothers wear sandals all of the time, I suppose they take them off when they go to bed but except for that, they wear them winter and summer and all in between, regardless of the weather.

There was also Someone awhile back that probably wore sandals quite often and probably even wore them to the Temple, does anyone think that He should have been looked down upon for that?

I am not sure but I think that it is written in the bible that we are “naked in the eyes of God”, so it could be our “inner clothing” as opposed to our “outer clothing” that catches the “Eye of God” and it is our “outer clothing” that catches the ‘eye of man (human)’.

Let’s remember that - at least I am fairly sure - the suggestions are a. just that, suggestions, and b. apply to those who can choose what is worn and choose inappropriate clothing anyway and repeatedly, not to those who cannot choose and do their very best with what little they have.

Wow - - you said this really well.
I think everyone agrees that there are some people who literally cannot afford
clothes other than jeans / very casual clothes. I don’t think anyone has a problem with them. I think the folks who get under my skin are the people who apparently have money to buy new clothes, but obviously choose to wear clothes to Mass that show a lot of skin. (halter tops, short shorts, etc.). I see people week in and week out, who don’t seem to understand that they are showing respect (or lack of it) by the way they dress. I think it’s great that the original post is highlighting a priest trying to gently enlighten people. : )

Bingo!!! And I was one of them. Again, I will still wear sneakers because of bad feet. Better to wear sneakers than anythig else, for anything else will make me scream out in pain, which I am sure would not go over too well. Believe me, I tried. They may have heard me in Australia.