Mass no no's

  • Thread starter Thread starter suppliant
  • Start date Start date
Status
Not open for further replies.
When my two adult kids were younger, and they misbehaved in Mass, I would just sit between them, so that they couln’t interact with each other. And of course, when it first started happening, we had discussions after Mass about the sacredness of the Mass and the inappropriateness of their behaviour.

I don’t know - it sounds simple, but it worked for us. Put distance between the siblings who are being disruptive. And my husband has almost never come to Mass with us, so I did this on my own. One thing though, he always made sure they were dressed respectfully before they left for Mass. 🙂
 
RCCDefender said:
:clapping: :clapping: :clapping: And since having read this thread I’ve noticed that I’ve been trying even harder not to be judgemental of people around me that for instance don’t dress the way I think they should, don’t parent the way I think they should or don’t seem to have the amount of reverence I think they should during mass. So, I think I maybe have grown (a little) as a result of this. Sometimes blessings come from the strangest places, don’t they??
Click to expand...
So, in other words, until the past several days you, too, were judgmental of not only people who weren’t dressed the way you thought they should be, weren’t parenting the way you thought they should and weren’t as reverent as you thought they should be, in addition to being judgmental here about those you feel are being too judgmental. Huh. Well now, I give you a high five for seeing the error of your ways but remember, old habits die hard. When someone has been that critical of others it’s highly unlikely they’ll change their ways practically overnight because of posts they’ve read on a message board but good luck to you, anyway. :)**
 
paramedicgirl said:
When my two adult kids were younger, and they misbehaved in Mass, I would just sit between them, so that they couln’t interact with each other. And of course, when it first started happening, we had discussions after Mass about the sacredness of the Mass and the inappropriateness of their behaviour.

I don’t know - it sounds simple, but it worked for us. Put distance between the siblings who are being disruptive. And my husband has almost never come to Mass with us, so I did this on my own. One thing though, he always made sure they were dressed respectfully before they left for Mass. 🙂
Click to expand...
I’ve seen that work with some, but it didn’t deter Gum Project Boy. He was reaching around the back of his mother to keep grabbing at his sister and while she was well behaved for the most part, she did start acting up a little and doing some of the same things he was doing while watching him from around thier mom.
 
paramedicgirl said:
When my two adult kids were younger, and they misbehaved in Mass, I would just sit between them, so that they couln’t interact with each other. And of course, when it first started happening, we had discussions after Mass about the sacredness of the Mass and the inappropriateness of their behaviour.
Click to expand...
That’s how we handled it too. Even now, it’s Mom, Mil, Dad then Net in the pew.

And I did handle it all myself before (Praise be to Jesus Christ) my hubby became Catholic.
 
Faith1960 said:
So, in other words, until the past several days you, too, were judgmental of not only people who weren’t dressed the way you thought they should be, weren’t parenting the way you thought they should and weren’t as reverent as you thought they should be, in addition to being judgmental here about those you feel are being too judgmental. Huh. Well now, I give you a high five for seeing the error of your ways but remember, old habits die hard. When someone has been that critical of others it’s highly unlikely they’ll change their ways practically overnight because of posts they’ve read on a message board but good luck to you, anyway. :)**
There are some key words there that I guess you missed: Even Harder. I hope you are seeing the error of these things, too. So, anyway, thanks for implying I’m a liar now. And I don’t believe in luck - you see I’m a Catholic.
Click to expand...
 
I think this thread is at a point everyone should agree to disagree before personal attacks start overtake the thread. I tend to agree with parts of both sides of the issue.

At first I took offense because I don’t have kids that sit perfectly still and quiet during mass. But I do discipline them and have taken them outside to calm down and this is what the pro-discipline side wants. I too have seen parents that seem to have no regard for discplining their kids, but that is a minority. As long as the parent is trying to discipline I have no problem with them. My oldest does whisper in the church because she is asking what is happening. I believe that it is important for her to ask these questions when it happens instead of trying to explain later when she no longer cares because something else is more important to her.

Kids should be at Mass and the parents should discpline them and teach them to respect what is going on.

Both sides have valid points that I will take and try to incorporate into my life. I will try to be more considerate in the future of who is around me. But I would also ask that people don’t immediately assume that I’m a bad parent because I’m whispering to my daughter during Mass.

Also, in our Parish the cry room is reserved for the immediate soothing of a child and the Paster has on numerous occasions asked people only use it for that purpose. He wants the children with the congregation. I think I’m blessed to have a very child friendly Parish.
 
Nechasin said:
I think this thread is at a point everyone should agree to disagree before personal attacks start overtake the thread. I tend to agree with parts of both sides of the issue.

At first I took offense because I don’t have kids that sit perfectly still and quiet during mass. But I do discipline them and have taken them outside to calm down and this is what the pro-discipline side wants. I too have seen parents that seem to have no regard for discplining their kids, but that is a minority. As long as the parent is trying to discipline I have no problem with them. My oldest does whisper in the church because she is asking what is happening. I believe that it is important for her to ask these questions when it happens instead of trying to explain later when she no longer cares because something else is more important to her.

Kids should be at Mass and the parents should discpline them and teach them to respect what is going on.

Both sides have valid points that I will take and try to incorporate into my life. I will try to be more considerate in the future of who is around me. But I would also ask that people don’t immediately assume that I’m a bad parent because I’m whispering to my daughter during Mass.

Also, in our Parish the cry room is reserved for the immediate soothing of a child and the Paster has on numerous occasions asked people only use it for that purpose. He wants the children with the congregation. I think I’m blessed to have a very child friendly Parish.
Click to expand...
If you’re trying to teach your kids to behave, and it certainly sounds as if you are, that’s all anyone asks. If your daughter quietly whispers a question and you quietly whisper an answer, again, that’s all anyone asks. I’ve been talking about the behaviors some parents are allowing in my parish that are to the extreme, very rude and inconsiderate.
It’s not a misbehavior that is addressed. It’s misbehaviors that are allowed to go on all throughout the Mass, sometimes being encouraged by the moms.
 
RCCDefender said:
There are some key words there that I guess you missed: Even Harder. I hope you are seeing the error of these things, too. So, anyway, thanks for implying I’m a liar now. And I don’t believe in luck - you see I’m a Catholic.
Click to expand...
Yeah, so am I. Are you now implying that to wish someone luck as a saying is somehow naughty?
 
Faith1960:

I realized that is what you were addressing and mentioned that in my message. You want the parent to address the issue and not just ignore the issue.

Everyone:
So far this has been a useful thread. But please don’t get personal or make personal attacks there is no need. If you can’t respond without a personal attack it would be better to not respond at all. It is getting to the point that both sides have had their say and nothing is going to change peoples minds. I think both sides have made useful comments and it would be a shame for someone to read the end of the thread, see personal attacks and then not go read the rest because of the assumption of personal attacks.
 
Nechasin said:
Faith1960:

I realized that is what you were addressing and mentioned that in my message. You want the parent to address the issue and not just ignore the issue.

Everyone:
So far this has been a useful thread. But please don’t get personal or make personal attacks there is no need. If you can’t respond without a personal attack it would be better to not respond at all. It is getting to the point that both sides have had their say and nothing is going to change peoples minds. I think both sides have made useful comments and it would be a shame for someone to read the end of the thread, see personal attacks and then not go read the rest because of the assumption of personal attacks.
Click to expand...
Thank you!
 
The funny thing I see going on here is that people who don’t like the disruptive and unruly behavior are being called “judgemental”… hey guys… in order to call those people “judgemnetal”… you have to make a judgement yourselves. One judgement is made on principles, virtues and discipline … the other is made to support the lack there of.
 
TradyDaddy said:
The funny thing I see going on here is that people who don’t like the disruptive and unruly behavior are being called “judgemental”… hey guys… in order to call those people “judgemnetal”… you have to make a judgement yourselves. One judgement is made on principles, virtues and discipline … the other is made to support the lack there of.
Click to expand...
Isn’t that what this whole thread is about? Everyone being judgemental of everyone else? I mean doesn’t the title practically scream, “Hey lets all bicker about everything that ticks us off during mass!”
 
Nechasin said:
But I do discipline them and have taken them outside to calm down and this is what the pro-discipline side wants.

Kids should be at Mass and the parents should discpline them and teach them to respect what is going on.
Click to expand...
This bears repeating, again and again, bolded and colored.
Thank you so much for stating this. When a child is being a child, we all understand. When a parent is not helping the child to understand that playground behavior is not for Holy Mass, that is the problem. A child will never learn to behave in Holy Mass if he/she is never there but also will not learn if not told how to act.

Spot on!
 
RCCDefender said:
Isn’t that what this whole thread is about? Everyone being judgemental of everyone else? I mean doesn’t the title practically scream, “Hey lets all bicker about everything that pisses us off during mass!”
Click to expand...
No, actually the title screams, “Vent here so you don’t explode at your parish.”
 
RCCDefender said:
Isn’t that what this whole thread is about? Everyone being judgemental of everyone else? I mean doesn’t the title practically scream, “Hey lets all bicker about everything that ticks us off during mass!”
Click to expand...
I find your use of language rather offensive. If you are that riled up, maybe you should have refrained from posting.
 
RCCDefender said:
:clapping: :clapping: :clapping: And since having read this thread I’ve noticed that I’ve been trying even harder not to be judgemental of people around me that for instance don’t dress the way I think they should, don’t parent the way I think they should or don’t seem to have the amount of reverence I think they should during mass. So, I think I maybe have grown (a little) as a result of this. Sometimes blessings come from the strangest places, don’t they??
Click to expand...
I agree with you since reading this thread i have tried to be much more tolerant myself. There were 2 little boys in the pew in front of me at Mass Sunday and I gave them extra smiles. So yeah it is funny were you get your blessings from at times.

I remember reading about 2 Priests who were imprisoned in China and they could not say Mass or recieve The Eucharist, they spoke about it after how they would say the mass in their heads the years they were imprisoned. I think about them, and about Priest who are still imprisoned in 3rd world countries and I have no problem with what goes on at Mass I truly am just glad to be there.I could after all be locked up in a prison and not be able to go to Mass.
 
Nechasin said:
Faith1960:

I realized that is what you were addressing and mentioned that in my message. You want the parent to address the issue and not just ignore the issue.

Everyone:
So far this has been a useful thread. But please don’t get personal or make personal attacks there is no need. If you can’t respond without a personal attack it would be better to not respond at all. It is getting to the point that both sides have had their say and nothing is going to change peoples minds. I think both sides have made useful comments and it would be a shame for someone to read the end of the thread, see personal attacks and then not go read the rest because of the assumption of personal attacks.
Click to expand...
I agree. The problem, as I see it, is that people are taking things much too personally which is causing them to become personal with others. This subject took off when I spoke about MY church and the way some parents in MY church are inconsiderate of their fellow parishioners by allowing their kids to act up during Mass. I said that those parents who allow this are rude and they aren’t doing their job as parents. I stand by that.
 
Faith1960 said:
I agree. The problem, as I see it, is that people are taking things much too personally which is causing them to become personal with others. This subject took off when I spoke about MY church and the way some parents in MY church are inconsiderate of their fellow parishioners by allowing their kids to act up during Mass. I said that those parents who allow this are rude and they aren’t doing their job as parents. I stand by that.
Click to expand...
And I stand behind your statement. Those in here attacking you are the ones being judgemental even though they won’t admit it. They have this, “how dare you ask others to be considerate” attitude but have no respect for your opinion.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top