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Highwayhound
Guest
The use of the Ice Bowl and the Green Bay Packers in this thread is wrong on so many levels. :nope:
The 1985 Chicago Bears and their Super Bowl Shuffle would be an appropriate team to use.
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The 1985 Chicago Bears and their Super Bowl Shuffle would be an appropriate team to use.
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Newbie2
Guest
That’s a cop out. It most certainly can be helped. It’s called “Chastity”.
It’s not easy, takes commitment, prayer and assistance of the Holy Spirit. But it can be helped.
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twf
Guest
Methodi:
Oral sex is NOT permitted for married couples as an end to itself. Oral sex is permitted as FOREPLAY. ALL sexual activity between a married man and woman must always culminate in intercourse. The Church teaches that sex is a gift from God. Sex is perverse and lacking if separate from its God-giving intents: procreation and unity. If a married couple engages in oral sex, finishes with intercourse, and is open to life…that’s perfectly spiritually healthy. If they engage in oral sex as an end to itself, not only are they are basically engaging in mutual masturbation, but they are depriving their intimacy of true, unreserve unity and openess to life. In sex, a man and woman must be willing to give their “all” to the other. Masturbation is even a greater perversion of sexuality, in a sense, as you are deriving sexual pleasure from an act that has not even an attempt at openess to procreation and unity with another person…
That all being said, it is far from impossible not to masturbate. It is much harder to stop once you find yourself stuck in the habbit. I think the key is to educate our children and try to help them not start to begin with. I knew that masturbation was wrong from a young age and thus never got into the habbit…I am a 22 year old man and I can assure you that masturbation is not even a temptation for me at this point. Because of your belief that not masturbating is nearly impossible, you may be tempted to question whether I have a normal sex drive…I can assure you that I do, as I am very tempted sexually with my girlfriend…masturbation just has never been an issue, whether I’ve been single or not.
Oral sex is NOT permitted for married couples as an end to itself. Oral sex is permitted as FOREPLAY. ALL sexual activity between a married man and woman must always culminate in intercourse. The Church teaches that sex is a gift from God. Sex is perverse and lacking if separate from its God-giving intents: procreation and unity. If a married couple engages in oral sex, finishes with intercourse, and is open to life…that’s perfectly spiritually healthy. If they engage in oral sex as an end to itself, not only are they are basically engaging in mutual masturbation, but they are depriving their intimacy of true, unreserve unity and openess to life. In sex, a man and woman must be willing to give their “all” to the other. Masturbation is even a greater perversion of sexuality, in a sense, as you are deriving sexual pleasure from an act that has not even an attempt at openess to procreation and unity with another person…
That all being said, it is far from impossible not to masturbate. It is much harder to stop once you find yourself stuck in the habbit. I think the key is to educate our children and try to help them not start to begin with. I knew that masturbation was wrong from a young age and thus never got into the habbit…I am a 22 year old man and I can assure you that masturbation is not even a temptation for me at this point. Because of your belief that not masturbating is nearly impossible, you may be tempted to question whether I have a normal sex drive…I can assure you that I do, as I am very tempted sexually with my girlfriend…masturbation just has never been an issue, whether I’ve been single or not.
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Methodi
Guest
I feel that oral sex shouldn
t be permitted at all, to me its perverse, I dont see how it could be pleasing to God, so if married couples can do that according to the church, so then single people should be able to masturbate, at least they wont be bringing children into the world out of wedlock
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MnklyMRPD
Guest
Hello!
You know, human as we are, we have physiological cycles. I don’t know with men, but with women, there is what we call the “up” times or periods when our bodies appear much warmer and we are said to be fertile and even termed “hot”, if not “wet” by others. This happens, I think, before and after our menstruation. This event I think adds to the sensual feelings or needs of women, that given the scenario and the weakness (un-awareness) of some women, they are most likely to be easily seduced, if not tempted to give in to sexual overtures or advances by a male (and probably, even by a female). Maybe, if they are aware of such physical feelings and manifestations and their right morality, they are more able to watch out and control any undue or uncalled-for urges bordering sexual activity, except perhaps, masturbation (due to its being safer than using another person for sexual energy release).
But different people I think, experience different levels of intensities of such sexual urges. Some religious people that I know of, try to curtail such intensity by minimizing their meat intakes or protein intakes (aside from avoiding sensual scenes, from pics to movies etc). But then, as we grow older, we need more proteins to hopefully continue rebuilding our degenerating cells. So, if it seems impossible to lessen our protein intakes, what do you think is another way of controlling, minimizing, if not subjugating such sexual urges?
Discipline is one thing I know, but sometimes hard to sustain. Praying is also one thing, which oftentimes works, but sometimes also fail. So, what do you think is the best, workable way?
Except from the idea of probably mortally and indirectly injuring ourselves (mind, body and feelings), if we don’t masturbate or release an excessive sexual energy, what other effects do you think will such control or stoppage do to our bodies and minds?
Just looking for more good enlightenment is this very controversial issue…
Thanks and God bless!
You know, human as we are, we have physiological cycles. I don’t know with men, but with women, there is what we call the “up” times or periods when our bodies appear much warmer and we are said to be fertile and even termed “hot”, if not “wet” by others. This happens, I think, before and after our menstruation. This event I think adds to the sensual feelings or needs of women, that given the scenario and the weakness (un-awareness) of some women, they are most likely to be easily seduced, if not tempted to give in to sexual overtures or advances by a male (and probably, even by a female). Maybe, if they are aware of such physical feelings and manifestations and their right morality, they are more able to watch out and control any undue or uncalled-for urges bordering sexual activity, except perhaps, masturbation (due to its being safer than using another person for sexual energy release).
But different people I think, experience different levels of intensities of such sexual urges. Some religious people that I know of, try to curtail such intensity by minimizing their meat intakes or protein intakes (aside from avoiding sensual scenes, from pics to movies etc). But then, as we grow older, we need more proteins to hopefully continue rebuilding our degenerating cells. So, if it seems impossible to lessen our protein intakes, what do you think is another way of controlling, minimizing, if not subjugating such sexual urges?
Discipline is one thing I know, but sometimes hard to sustain. Praying is also one thing, which oftentimes works, but sometimes also fail. So, what do you think is the best, workable way?
Except from the idea of probably mortally and indirectly injuring ourselves (mind, body and feelings), if we don’t masturbate or release an excessive sexual energy, what other effects do you think will such control or stoppage do to our bodies and minds?
Just looking for more good enlightenment is this very controversial issue…
Thanks and God bless!
T
teachccd
Guest
First, it is not o.k. for a married couple to have oral sex unless it is just done as foreplay and the act ends in intercourse. But just as you did not know about that is the same way that you do not know Church teachings on masturbation. If you do then you disagree with them. I know a lot of Protestants who disagree with what our Church teaches as well. You can rationalize your own “feelings” about anything that the Church teaches but that does not make it truth. If you know the Church to be established by Christ and speaks with authority given through the guidance of the Holy Spirit then you do well. If not then you should reconsider…teachccd
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jenlovesyu
Guest
Hi Methodi, as I stated in my earlier response to this thread, masturbation is not an act that fits into marriage because all it seeks is to pleasure one’s self. Oral sex is different. Like other posters have said, oral sex in marriage must not be acted upon if the procreative act of sex is ignored. I am not sure whether you are a woman or a man but for women it is quite difficult to achieve an orgasm by sexual intercourse alone. Do you think God only meant for the husbands to receive ultimate pleasure from the marital embrace? It is a loving thing for a husband to make sure his wife is pleased just as he is.
Masturbation does not fit into the marital embrace because it is not an act that procreative nor unitive. Those are the two elements of sex that God wants husbands and wives to incorporate in the marital embrace. You can’t have one without the other and you definitely can not have neither when it comes to sexual acts. Masturbation is not satisfying to your spouse nor can it possibly create a child. It is a purely selfish act that has no place in any person’s life. Our sex drives were created for reproduction, not because we need sex to live.
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MarieCB
Guest
Okay, that made me laugh out loud. I personally don’t believe masturbation is a sin (I know, I’d make a really bad Catholic), but then again, I’ve never heard it even discussed among religious folk until I found this site. However, pray ahead of time and then think pure thoughts? Seems to me you’d be wearing off your skin before you … well, achieved anything. LOL
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MarieCB
Guest
You don’t use NFP, do you?
Your temperature goes up slightly just after ovulation, which usually occurs 12-16 days before your next period. During that time, there’s also increased sexual desire, and your body will be more “ready” for sex. After your period, your temperature will drop slightly until ovulation. So about halfway through the month, your temperature, and libido, goes up.Yes, I’ve used NFP and no, I’m not Catholic.
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MnklyMRPD
Guest
First heard of NFP. What is this? Oh, you mean natural family planning? I never need to use this as I’m single. I see that you are married and not a Catholic…You don’t use NFP, do you?
Yes, I’ve used NFP and no, I’m not Catholic.
You know, natural stroking is probably just fine, but using other gadgets to arouse oneself is truly, for me, a mad and perverse thing. If this is truly a sin, this act makes the sin more grievous.
This sexual energy… have you ever heard of something effective to do that helps dissipate it? Well, being suddenly disturbed and terrified about being caught is an effective dissipitating agent I think… but what else could be effective too? In your opinion, is it the proteins or the fats/oils that we eat that gives us the high libido?
Just needing more enlightenment here… even if I’m not that an M person really…
Tnx…
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MarieCB
Guest
Natural Family Planning is an unfortunate term, I believe, because that makes it sound like it’s only useful for Catholics.
Think of it as being vividly aware of your body. If I had had daughters, I would have taught them about it from the time they entered puberty, so that it was second nature by adulthood. It means you know exactly when you ovulate, how your body responds, etc. And it means that if something unusual happens, you can recognize it. I found that it was a way to really realize just how amazing the design and function of the female body is. I can remember telling a doctor the day that I became pregnant. She laughed at me and said that women never know the day they get pregnant because no one pays close enough attention. I had to show her my temperature, mucus and cervical chart before she tentatively believed me.I don’t think the Catholic church approves of masturbation even if you’re not using toys.
We’re human and we’re meant to have sexual energy. Generations ago, people married shortly after puberty. Now we wait until we’re in our 20s or older. Definitely not the way we were designed. I do not believe, not even for a minute, that anything we eat affects it.
I honestly don’t believe I’ve ever tried to “dissipate” sexual energy without sex or masturbation. That seems, to me, like trying to get rid of hunger without eating. I suppose it’s possible, but why?? But then again, if you read my other posts, you’ll find that I’m very sexually liberal. Definitely not a role model for an unmarried Catholic.
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Methodi
Guest
If sex in marriage is all about pleasure & acheiving orgasm, whats wrong with the poor women & men who have sexual tension & just for some reason cannot find a husband or a wife, for one reason or another, then what is wrong with masturbation, I think nothing. again I repeat again , we are all sexual beings, God gave us all our sexuality, tho I am catholic, I abide by the church, but I do not believe that God only meant sex for married people, take a look at the world around you, I have, there arent many people living chastely , Sex as we all know is a very strong appetite, most cannot control it. God knows man is weak, Christ died for so called sinners, so all this is meant to be as far as I am concerned.Prostitution is the oldest profession in the world, who knows maybe God meant it. I am not writing this to be disrespectful to God, its just how I feel about it. I am a male, have been around the block many times have done it all, so i am not a holier than thou person
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thistle
Guest
I’m confused. How can you say you “abide by the Church” and in the same breath say you “don’t believe that God only meant sex for married people”. If that’s what you believe then you are NOT abiding by the Church teaching. Its no good to simply go to Confession and confess you have masturbated. Are you also confessing that you stubbornly reject a Church teaching?
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MnklyMRPD
Guest
You know, the one thing that sparked me into spirituality interests is this human body instincts, particularly, this sexual drives or urges. Ever since I got seriously aware that most Catholics really consider it a sin, I started questioning why and kept trying to find out if its really possible not to engage in it. I did many readings about it. I even tried asking one nun about it but she was elusive. Then an elder nun seemed more game and knowing, asking me in return, “Oh, the clitoris?”. I didn’t understand then what the clitoris had to do with it. When I did it, I wasn’t particularly aware what gives me pleasure and what part of my body is really turned-on when I do “strokes” you know, so I honestly didn’t get what she meant by it then. I guess, I just feel the over-all effect without being aware of the details where it starts and how it goes about the body. All I know is that, I seemed more relaxed after doing it. My little speech problem way back before was even “helped” by it slowly…
Anyway, since I just stared at her when she said that, she made a change of subject, about which I just rode on without mentioning my question again. I guess, I couldn’t believe then that a nun can be that “knowing”… I was afraid of what will come next should I pursue the topic. I guess I wasn’t ready yet, taking or understading it from a nun…
Anyway, back to the foods we eat. With the many readings that I made, and with my little biochemistry knowledge, I do believe that some things we eat affect it or it increases our sexual urges at one time or another. Ever heard of aphrodisiacs? These are examples of foods that increase our libido. Some of these are herbals. But these fats/oils thing… I sure believe it does add to our libido. I made self-experiments you see. I tried to lessen my protein, fats/oils intake for some days… and I found out that the “itch” or the urge doesn’t manifest much. Then, I tried eating more of it for some days too and I found out, especially these fatty/oily foods?.. they really add to the “wetness”, if not the urge. Then for some few times, I eat in a banquet or fiesta or any celebration where there are lots of proteinaceaous, fatty and oily foods and even veggies and/or herbs? In some cases, I experienced a sort of “high” in sexual urge the following day or immediately after…Its like a sexual tension, thus the energy term I use for it, since in Physics, tension is simply energy… thus sexual energy…
I tell you, some religious people that I know of, try to minimize their proteinaceaous, fatty/oily (name removed by moderator)uts. Ever saw Franciscan male monks? They are very lean in body and some can even be categorized as simply small in body, if not thin. I hear they control their meat/fats/oil intakes, or they do not eat meat/fats/oils at all. I’m not so sure which is which, but bottomline is that, they believe that some foods we eat, when taken excessively, increases our libido. And since they want to be spiritual people, they try to lessen it, if not eradicate it…
In a way, we are flesh and blood alright. How can we be physically spiritual, if we attach ourselves to worldly things like these flesh and blood “business” of eating flesh too? At least, getting rid of this partly, if not wholly, is a big step in trying to be spiritual.
But then again, what are the options? The plants? But there also are aphrodisiacs among them… thus, I guess, the ultimate best thing to do, is to choose the right foods to eat… have a good balance of it (without excesses) for the good of both our body and soul…
Well, maybe immersing oneself in a tub of cold water will do wonders in curbing the “hotness” or the tension. Question is, is hotness and tension th same? I haven’t tried this way yet and see if it can really dissipate tension. When I get to have a tub of cold water, maybe, next time it happens, I’ll try to use this…Immersing is different from showering, so maybe, it will work…But then again, when we say tension, it means, tightness, the nerves etc are constricted, the electrical conduits are heavily loaded and the likes… How is this loosened up? Maybe, instead of cold bath, a hot bath will be better. I haven’t tried any of this yet… but since these ideas came suddenly floating now, I guess, if there’s next time and I have the resource, maybe, I’ll experiment with these too…I honestly don’t believe I’ve ever tried to “dissipate” sexual energy without sex or masturbation. That seems, to me, like trying to get rid of hunger without eating. I suppose it’s possible, but why?? But then again, if you read my other posts, you’ll find that I’m very sexually liberal. Definitely not a role model for an unmarried Catholic.
You know, my background is technical/scientific… yet, I dig into these spirituality matters. Just looking for more meanings in this life, I guess…Thanks.
Other more enlightenments/insights are surely welcome…
J
jenlovesyu
Guest
Ok I am starting to think that you aren’t really paying attention to what I am writing.
**Sex in marriage is for uniting a husband and wife (giving one’s self to the other, which will inevitably result in some pleasure), and possibly creating new life. God created sex to unite a husband and wife and to create children. **
I suggest you talk to your priest to get a better understanding of why we have sexual drives in the first place, or read a book. We are not mere animals that can’t control ourselves. We are human beings created in the image of God. Lots of people are treating sex like nothing because they either don’t know or don’t care about God’s Word. Jesus came to help us to overcome sin so we could be saved in the end just like He overcame death after the crucifixion. Sin=death. Jesus believes we are much stronger than we give ourselves credit for.
When people have sex their brains release Oxytocin which is a “trust” hormone as some people like to call it. It brings the two people together. God gave us sexuality for marriage. For marriage. I am a woman who has a VERY filthy past. Do I still masturbate as much as I use to? I don’t even masturbate at all! And trust me, I did it a lot. Can I not live without “releasing the tension?” I’m telling you, once you make it a HABIT to stop, it becomes extremely easy to avoid touching yourself. All I do is think of other things when dirty thoughts start to trail their way into my head, or start saying a prayer. Dwelling on them is unhealthy and wont bring you closer to God.
How do you think your actions now are going to affect your future marriage? What if your wife can’t please you the way your hand can? What if you end up resorting to touching yourself when your wife isn’t around because what she does doesn’t satisfy you? Masturbation causes you to only think about what YOU can get out of it. Also, people tend to think of other people as sex objects when they masturbate. How does that build up another person, how is that respecting another person? Love is a giving action not a “what can I get” type deal. It wont help your future wife and it’s a slap in God’s face to think that sex was meant for anything else He designed it for. He wants you to project those sexual urges towards your wife, but in a healthy, loving way. If you think oral sex is wrong, don’t do it. But as a Catholic, you are required to abide by the Church’s teaching whether you agree with it or not.
Please, to stop masturbating is truly for your benefit and your future wife’s. You are not helpless without it. You are being lied to by that ugly red thing that the only way to control your sexual urges is to masturbate. It’s a lieeee! If only you knew my past you would be very astounded as to how I have been able to control myself the way the Church and God really wants me to. I’m very far from perfect but seriously, this stuff ain’t as hard as you think it is. With God everything is possible, and perfectly wonderful!
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Fredbird
Guest
OK here is a twist. If a husband has had a vasectomy and no chance, other than totally Gods will to have a kid, is every time they have sex a sin? What if that married couple engage in mutual masturbation?
And yes a person can masturbate without having lustful thoughs.
And yes a person can masturbate without having lustful thoughs.
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jenlovesyu
Guest
No because a married couple has an obligation to consummate their marriage. It would be the same kinda thing if the woman was infertile. If God wants the couple to produce a child, He in all His Glory will find a way to make it happen. God decides when people are created
If the man is not releasing his seed into his wife, he is commiting a grave sin. He is taking the procreative aspect away from sex and thus defying God’s design for human sexuality. If the man wants to please his wife by touching her before or after he releases his seed, he may do so. It takes away the unitive aspect of marital union if the wife touches herself on her own regardless of whether the husband is present or not.
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lumenorientale
Guest
Your logic isn’t panning out. So you have a compunction against married people orally stimulating each other before actual intercourse, but you are okay with single people to manual stimulate themselves? And it should be okay with God and His Church? And your reasons are that less children will be born out of wedlock?
Now, you didn’t answer my original question. How would masturbation solve the problem of sexual activity outside of marriage, when it only opens the door to lust–given that one must think lustful thoughts in order to acheive the desired effect of the activity, and those thoughts don’t just POOF–go away after orgasm?
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Methodi
Guest
Tho I do not agree, If I sin, I will confess it, cause the church says it is a sin, I am sure most catholics have trouble with some teaching of the church, In fact I know they do. I talk to many people who are catholic, even some of the priests & religious have problems with some of the teachings. As far as My spiritual life, I am doing the best I can Like everyone else, trying to make my way with doubts of course, but we all have doubts at times. I believe most catholics are fudging it . The world has too much to offer & people want a taste of it. Again God knows we are weak, all he asks is that we try, He knows we will fail at times, That is why he sacrificed His Son Jesus , to redeem the world. I do abide by the church teaching, if I sin I go to confession, receive absolution, at least I am humble enuff to go most catholics dont even bother, You cant know what is between a man & God. This is the way i feel & I dont think God will punish me for it
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Methodi
Guest
I am saying that if oral sex is ok for married people which I think is disgusting, Then why not masturbation for others who are not married. If people masturbate, they can curbe their sex desires & maybe prevent a pregnancy that is unwanted & the baby suffers. Also I think masturbation is healthy, again I say sex is not just for the married, I dont think anyone really believes that, save for a few
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