Men prefer debt free virgins

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1ke said:
Women who write blogs should either (a) go to college or (b) take some remedial grammar courses, because this blog is full of grammar errors. It undermines her credibility, such as it is, entirely.
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The sad thing is that Lori Alexander actually is a college graduate and so are a number of her children. Plus, she’s a doctor’s daughter and her husband is a consultant for dental practices. She lives a very, very materially comfortable life.

Lori Alexander has no idea what kind of life she is telling young women to pursue, because she herself has never lived that life.
 
JanSobieskiIII said:
It did not, I’m just kind of chuckling at the article. Although the concept doesn’t sound awful to me:rofl:
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The thing is that like is attracted to like in many of these categories.

Guys with lots of tattoos often pair up with tattooed ladies. (For evidence, go to a water park this time of year and walk around.)

College educated guys prefer college educated gals.

Likewise, a frugal guy might prefer a frugal gal. There are a lot of exceptions in this category (hence Dave Ramsey’s description of marriages often containing a “nerd” and a “free spirit”), but Zzyzx Road seems to be in the frugal-seeking-frugal category.

What isn’t doable is expecting to be a tattoed, debt-ridden dude who has been around the block, and thinking that you deserve a sheltered, tattoo-free, debt-free virgin who lives with her parents. Does that ever happen? Sure. Do men with a past look bad demanding women who have lived completely different lives than they have? You better believe it.
 
Yeah but I’m talking about recently qualified people. Fresh out of a four year course of English studies.

😉
 
I know the type you’re talking about. They aggravate me to know end. I remember having a teacher in high school who taught English, and she HATED literature and would occasionally tell me I made up words if I used one she didn’t know and deduct points :roll_eyes:
 
Xantippe said:
Zzyzx Road seems to be in the frugal-seeking-frugal category.
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Spending within limits does not necessarily equal frugal. Think about it.

“Prudent” is a more appropriate adjective.
 
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Zzyzx_Road said:
Spending within limits does not necessarily equal frugal. Think about it.

“Prudent” is a more appropriate adjective.
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Prudent is more of an umbrella term–it covers a lot of different life choices. I think you need to narrow it down a bit for clarity, so people understand that you are speaking specifically about financial prudence.

I suppose “financially responsible” is another option.
 
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I should add that a doctor with $200k in student loans or a physician’s assistant with $100k in student loans can be financially prudent. It’s a risk, but it’s a calculated risk.

These days, though, $100k in debt for law school might not be as safe a bet.

Also, come to think of it, it shouldn’t be a problem if our hypothetical tattoo-free virgin owns a home with a mortgage, assuming that she has a reasonable amount of equity and her housing expenses are a reasonable percentage of her income.

Edited to add: Trajectory is also important. Let’s say, for example, that our hypothetical single person (and it could be a man or a woman), made dumb choices in colleges, wound up with $100k in debt (which is astronomical for a BA), but has discovered Dave Ramsey, works a second job, and has been paying off $20k a year for a couple of years. It would be dumb to treat that person as unmarriageable, when they are on track to doing very well.
 
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I kind of already said this, but I’m stuck holding a sleeping baby who will freak if I move. So, I’ll hit repeat.

God is up there laughing at our preferences. Somebody who is none of those things you thought you wanted might come into your life and your socks will fly off your feet in shock.

When you’ve met that person He set aside for you, you cannot imagine a life not married to them. You’d risk it all. You’d take on their debt. Heck you might even get a tattoo, but that seems considerably less likely. The point is everything points to your life with them if you have discerned it is your vocation to marry that person.
 
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Shazam! There’s literally a line of Good Catholic Women forming outside my house! 😬 It’s rough being a college educated virgin without debt and tattoos 😩

Everybody apparently wants to marry me :roll_eyes:
 
I went to college. I was very lucky and had no debt. My parents put aside money for our education and I received scholarships.

I’m a nurse and was told by a priest that nursing is a vocation. By definition, nurses have to go to college. So do teachers. The Church has a long history of caring for the poor and the sick. There are orders of nuns who do this. So if the Church had a problem with the education of women it would be hypocritical to say the least!

I actually make more than my husband does. He has autism and has a limited number of jobs he can do. But he doesn’t feel threatened by that. I respect him and submit to his headship. He is self-taught on a few subjects and we can have intellectual discussions which we both enjoy. He is very supportive of our daughter pursuing higher education if that’s what she wants to do.
 
Xantippe said:
I should add that a doctor with $200k in student loans or a physician’s assistant with $100k in student loans can be financially prudent. It’s a risk, but it’s a calculated risk.

These days, though, $100k in debt for law school might not be as safe a bet.
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That is more along the lines of how I think. I look for state of mind around this. If she isn’t financially responsible with her own money, how can I trust that she’ll be responsible with mine? I have the example of my mother who paid all the bills and was very prudent and sometimes frugal with my father’s income.
 
Not only have women worked as doctors and nurses in hospitals but have also ran Catholic hospitals.
 
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I agree.

If you are American you ought to be displayed in the Smithsonian or if you are British you ought to be locked up in the Tower of London along with the Crown Jewels 💎.
 
Zzyzx_Road said:
That is more along the lines of how I think. I look for state of mind around this. If she isn’t financially responsible with her own money, how can I trust that she’ll be responsible with mine? I have the example of my mother who paid all the bills and was very prudent and sometimes frugal with my father’s income.
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And I’d add (from personal experience) that it’s very difficult to learn to manage money without having money to manage.
 
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