Depends really, on the intensity of feelings and the intensity of disappointment. Off the top of my head I could mention only one case but even then the contact finally died and it did so long ago.
Mention the fact you know her date of birth, favorite food, and social security number - not creepy and sure to earn a first dateSo lately I’ve noticed more ladies checking me out. In particular, there was this one girl giving announcements today at Mass who seemed to be looking at me over and over (or so it seemed). I had run into her earlier when I held a door for her, so maybe that is what prompted it.
Anyway, after Mass I happened to walk past her as she was standing in the vestibule promoting some upcoming event. I looked straight at her and said hello, at which point she replied but sorta shyly looked away and smiled; she seemed happy at the greeting.
I got her name from her little announcement at Mass, but I otherwise have no clue who she is (although I think I’ve seen her around before). A part of me definitely wants to try chatting her up some more, but I’m not sure how I’m supposed to do that in a non-creepy manner…I’m not too good at that. I have no “in” so to speak to get stuff started.
So I’m turning to you guys for advice. If I see her again, how do I approach her and chat her up in a non-creepy manner?
Well, no… I mean, it’s fine to approach a girl you don’t know. Just don’t do it in the forced and awkward sort of way I commented on in my last post is all I’m saying. You don’t necessarily have to get a date out of them the very first time you meet.
How’s that?
Last May our youngest daughter married a great guy. I could not have picked a better husband for her than she did. They both were involved in the same large Church group, but barely knew one another. One day they were chatting and he said to her quite directly that he was interested in getting to know her and being more than friends. A year later they were married.
That’s what I’m saying, though… In his case they’d at least talked a few times and broken the ice before he came out and said that. I don’t think something like that is weird at all. In any case, I’m happy everything worked out so well for them.
Yeah, and I am talking about the latter. I like to keep close contact with my friends. And if you have feelings for a friend, then that’s just damn difficult.
If you ask someone out just for the sake of asking (practicing) and the person happens to be really interested only to later discover that you were just practicing on her, then that isn’t funny.
It’s just “I really think you are attractive and I am interested in getting to know you better.” Not a marriage proposal, lol. If you’re not at all attracted to a certain girl, than yeah don’t even bother because that would be dishonest. However once you do come across another girl you find attractive go ahead and try it; what’s the worst that could happen? Even if by some miracle this type of cold approach actually worked, at least you could go on a few dates and see if it works out. No harm done.
Meaning she’s “spoken for” with someone else or with you?
Someone else. I wasn’t sure at first, but then she kept dropping surefire words that signalled she wasn’t available.
Ah, it will be okay. God intended for you to be with someone, so you will find a nice girl. You just have to not be afraid to look. She might have been taken, but the next one might not!
I’m really don’t believe that anymore. I’ve been ignored and overlooked so many times I don’t have hope I will find someone. Experience has taught me otherwise.
Tja, when you meet a girl you don’t know, just avoid thinking too much and making plans on how to approach her. (For me, when I do such a thing, it would usually costs me a night or two and I would get nothing out of the fantasies.) Try to treat her exactly as you would treat a guy you don’t yet know. That way, you would always have a peaceful and healthy mind.
Just practice it. 'til it happens. There’s no perfect time for it, 'cept when God decides it’s time. Just live life, man. It’ll be ok. We aren’t defined by who we’re with, but by how much we love God, ourselves and each other.
So its a good thing you tried! keep it up!!Sorry man. It happens. I had a co-worker about a year ago who I had a small crush on. I rarely talked to her because of my shyness and not knowing how to just start a conversation because I assumed that we were very different people (I have a criminal past) I finally got the courage to talk to her and she was being so cool and friendly that I though I could ask her out. Good thing she randomly mentioned somthing about her husband to me before I did
(she did not have a wedding ring so I did not know)
Agreed!