My 4 year old has begun resisting bedtime prayers

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TheBomb.Com said:
Pray the Psalms with him. It will help a lot!
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That’s pretty broad and way too harsh.

To a 4 year-old…

“Yea - though I may walk through
the valley of the shadow of death,
I shall fear no evil…”

Is going to sound like…

“There’s a monster under my bed!
Everything is out to kill me.
I’d best not let my guard down or go to sleep”

Another example, Psalm 51, is a great Psalm. But the reason David wrote it is likely nothing a preteen would ever be able to relate to.

Then there’s the imprecatory Psalms… and on and on…

In general, the bible was not written for children, so you have to be careful in how it is explained to them.

Even a crucifix, as noble as the crucifixion’s purpose was, is incredibly hard to explain to a child - and even uncatechized, unformated and undiscerning adults and non-believers, who see it as nothing more than an object of horror… Its important the percipient understand the goodness of God first, so they can then understand what a horror sin is… otherwise, it would appear completely backwards to the person, and probably even be better for them to reject it rather than take an incorrect interest in it…
 
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My parents used to say a rosary outside my bedroom door when I refused. Granted I was a teenager but to this day I cannot sit through a rosary. It brings up feelings of being horribly trapped and a high level of anxiety. And I am someone who doesn’t get particularly stressed at all. So I’d say it had a profound negative affect.

Let your child be your guide. My eldest loves repetition and will happily say prayers with me. So we do.
My youngest dislikes it and doesn’t respond to any type of set prayer. However we chat about bible stories and history with religious themes. So we do that.

Grace is a must if they want to eat. No exceptions there.

There is a fine line between modeling, encouraging and shoving it down someones throat. My parents, despite good intentions killed my faith in many ways.
 
I’m doing my best to remain chaste. David and I live in separate homes but occasionally he stays the night with me. When he does, he almost always sleeps in the living room while I sleep in the bedroom. Colton sleeps in the bedroom too but usually in his own bed. He does often want to share the bed with me though so I let him since he gets scared.
 
I definitely do not think my son is possessed. I think he’s just a typical 4 year old and is tired sometimes. Perhaps he is just exercising his authority by trying to say no sometimes too. Whether or not I should just let it go when he says no, I don’t know. I am thinking I should but I’m not entirely sure.
 
If you think he’s tired, just do a super short prayer. Thank you Jesus for this day, God bless Mommy and Daddy and Colton. Amen. Then try to pray earlier the next night.
 
Switch to “wake up” prayers? I agree with those who suggesting adding his lack of desire to your prayers. It’s likely a phase and he’ll work through it in time, just keep setting an example for him!
 
You’re doing a great job in practicing your faith with your son. Always pray for him and ask Jesus, Mary and Joseph to always help you keep your family under their mantle of protection. We live in difficult times especially with the breakdown of the family which is what “the enemy” wants, to destroy our seeds. This would be the reason in end times, our blessed mother will come to defend the family.
If your son is afraid for whatever reason, in my opinion, please keep the prayers up. Your doing something good and we want to keep the enemy away. He’s very innocent 😇 a little saint himself still. Ask god to take away anything that is not of Christ, away from all of you. Pray that in time god reveal himself to your son in a way that he will understand. (Advise once from a Spiritual director).
Always bless yourselves with holy water and your home as well frequently.
There’s a children’s bible that I think would be great to read together, it is easy to understand and has pictures and questions and easy definitions. since I’m new to this, I’m not yet able to post a picture.
I teach religious education and I used this Bible for my 1st graders. It’s The Catholic children’s Bible by saint mary press. The cover has a colorful picture of Christ Jesus with children. Place a blessed miraculous medal on him at all times. Teach him what sacramentals are. You’re laying down a good solid foundation for yourselves.
I’ll pray for you and your family.
Peace, Grace and Blessings
 
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Perhaps keeping prayer time to just a couple of minutes with time also spent reading a good book. Keep it positive.
 
He’s four. It’s to be expected. Just keep doing what you’re doing, the habit of saying bedtime prayers will be reinforced, and he’ll forget to complain.
 
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I came up with a trick. If I ask him if he’s going to do his bedtime prayers and he says “No.” then I say “Well, I’m going to do my bedtime prayers.” and then I recite the same bedtime prayers I pray with him out loud. I think it worked really well. I’ve done it twice and the last time I did it he started repeating after me. 🙂
 
Find the type of prayer he likes best.

For example: with my 8 year old daughter, she prefers (and always has) spontaneous/ conversational prayer. So that’s what she & I do at bedtime.

My 4 year old son prefers Liturgical prayer. So I pray the Our Father, Hail Mary, Glory Be, & Fatima Prayer with him. I do one line at a time and he repeats each line. Sometimes I add so additional prayers after the above.

Godspeed & God Bless!
 
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Holly3278 said:
He will cry a little when I go against his wishes and do them anyway. I’m not sure how to handle this.
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Imagine if this was any other issue besides prayer: buckling his seatbelt in the car, eating healthy food, taking a bath… As I tell my kids about these, about prayers, and about many other things: we all have to do some things we don’t feel like doing. If we lived in heaven our feelings would always enjoy when we made wise choices. Here on earth, our feelings don’t always agree. Too bad so sad. We make wise choices anyway.

And yes, I’d say that to my four year old too. It may not sink in the first 1,000,000 times I say it, but eventually they get it. Best of luck!!
 
I should add, lighting a candle and dimming the lights makes bedtime prayer much more captivating to Littles, I’ve found. 🙂
 
Hello OP 🙂 When I was little mum would sing the prayers with us,as did her mum with her I’m sure.
My four children took very naturally to singing ,especially exclaiming the AMEN ! at the end 🙂
It was all low key,often in bed with a candle lit and a little statue or picture visible.
Otherwise on our knees in the lounge room ,lights dimmed before the mantelpiece with holy pictures and a candle.We have an open fire so it was very peaceful and calm.
God bless 🙏
 
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Thanks everyone! You have all given such great advice! I am going to see about turning prayer time into a ritual with a candle and perhaps a statue of the Virgin Mary or some other holy image. I will let you all know how it goes once I am able to do it.
 
Little ones don’t even understand death the majority of the time. Psalms mentioning death will not phase a four-year-old. I was taught to pray the following prayer every night as a toddler: ‘Now I lay me down to sleep, I pray the Lord my soul to keep. If I should die before I wake, I pray the Lord my soul to take.’ It didn’t phase me. I enthusiastically said it every night. The biggest issue you have to keep in mind with little ones is that they have short attention spans and don’t have the understanding of older children and adults.
 
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And we ought be speaking about death, it is part of life and everyone of us will die.
 
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