My husband cheated and old post is locked

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anakate

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my previous post was locked. I’m not looking for legal advice to be clear, please don’t leave any so this one won’t be blocked too. I just want to keep everyone updated. I appreciate all the support more than i can say.
Apparently my husband and Jezebel have consulted with the best attournies in our town. I got a lawyer but he’s not my first choice. our house was in my in laws name, i should have been evicted properly bit due to the restraining order I can’t live there. I did get to go back with a police escort to collect more thingsbit of course everything important was nowhere to be found.

we had an emergency custody hearing and I can only see my children in a monitored room for 2 hours a week :cry: my husband currently has full custody. there is an on going case with child services. I know they are training my children on things to say against me. There are preposterous accusations against me.

im currently looking for a job but a high school graduate who hasn’t worked in ages is hard enough to get a job and impossible with pending criminal charges not to mention I’m about to pop a baby out. Apparently they got pictures of all the damage I caused and injuries😑

I truly appreciate all ofthe prayers and support. I have few friends and family so this means the world to me.
 
AnaKate, I’m so sorry your thread got derailed/deleted. Please surround yourself with allies to help you during this time. We all here care about your situation very much. Things will not always be as dark as they are right now. Have faith that the Lord will make things right.
 
I’m glad that you’re getting legal advice. I really am appalled by your husband’s behavior. Please, don’t lose faith. Remember, you have the truth on your side. And fwiw, you have all of us, praying for you.
 
Cecilia_Dympna said:
I hope that it’s okay to ask, but what are these accusations? 2 hours a week contact is pretty much the worst I’ve ever come across. I’m in a different country, but I work with children, and I’ve been involved with some pretty awful safeguarding cases. I’m never seen a parent with such little allowed contact.
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I read the other thread, and it looks like the OP pushed the door into the other woman while she was holding her newborn and knocked them to the floor, then hit her husband and damaged his phone. I can’t imagine the rage she must have felt, being locked out of her own home and her husband taking the kids away from her only to be found celebrating with this other woman. It doesn’t sound like anyone was seriously hurt, but these are still serious charges that will be difficult for her to defend.

I do hope the court is sympathetic that she was dealing with a colossal jerk who has destroyed his family. But it is going to be hard to fight for much custody with these charges. Praying for you, anakate.
 
I don’t think the court will be sympathetic. The US court system will find her guilty if she did it, even if she had a really good reason for doing it. Maybe (And this is NOT legal advice, just thinking out loud) she’d be able to avoid most of the ramifications of a guilty charge if she pled guilty by reason of insanity, but the jury wouldn’t be doing their job if they acquitted her because she was cheated on.

That being said, I do wish that adultery was a crime in the US. It’s terrible what OP’s husband did and one can only hope that he comes to his senses before it’s too late. I’m praying for OP and for the safety of her children.
 
Capta(name removed by moderator)rudeman said:
I don’t think the court will be sympathetic. The US court system will find her guilty if she did it, even if she had a really good reason for doing it. Maybe (And this is NOT legal advice, just thinking out loud) she’d be able to avoid most of the ramifications of a guilty charge if she pled guilty by reason of insanity, but the jury wouldn’t be doing their job if they acquitted her because she was cheated on.
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I agree. I hope that she is granted as much custody as possible, because she sounds like a good mom who acted uncharacteristically due to the circumstances of the situation. But as badly as she was hurt and as terrible as her husband has been, she did endanger an infant and assaulted her husband (based on her own description). I don’t know what kinds of ramifications a guilty charge for these will bring, but I’d guess either way Child Services will take them very seriously.
 
I wish we could bring back fault-based divorce like pre-1968.
I wonder then if her case would be different. As it stands now, one party can file for divorce and get out of a marriage and every thing goes “halfers=half” no matter who is at fault or who is the innocent party.
 
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Since I last looked into this situation, I can see things went terribly wrong. Granted, I’m only getting one side of the story but it sounds like this was going on for quite a while. Most unfortunate.
 
Please PM me if you need additional support. I am here for you, sending good wishes and reminding you that you are strong and capable. You can be a warrior momma here. I believe in you.
 
Indeed. I have a bad feeling about this. Hopefully, her parents can provide necessary aid. Nevertheless, this entire saga was masterfully planned and executed for her demise. It is a series of unfortunate events… 😞
 
If there are ”preposturous things” claimed, few accusations are made, lies spun unless a kernel of truth or it won’t be believed. OP might discuss any slander with her lawyer to see if he/she can explain it away.
Like a charge of ”beats the kids” might be based on a reality of strict rules & time outs, but no physical discipline, and so on.
A lawyer can’t help if his/her client isn’t upfront.
 
Yep. Set up like something in a movie! This has been in the works for a long time.
 
It gives me the distinct impression that this wasn’t just a drunken fling…
 
anakate said:
we had an emergency custody hearing and I can only see my children in a monitored room for 2 hours a week :cry: my husband currently has full custody. there is an on going case with child services.
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What is the allegation? Why would a judge grant this? What happened?
 
From the locked thread:
anakate said:
I so regret leaving. I called my husband to inquire about my children only to find my phones turned off. After battling with my emotions for awhile I decided to head home and see what was going on. When I got there I discovered all of the door locks were chamged and the house seemed empty. I drove to my in-laws (We live on there massive farm so it took just a minute) There yard had some unfamiliar cars and blue balloons and ribbons hung all around. At tgis point I was seeing red. I knocked on the door and Jezebel opened it slightly, standing there with the baby and the biggest grin asking did I need something. In the background my 4 year old daughter said Mommy do you see my new brother! I pushed the door open wider and Jezebel fell back against the wall in the most dramatic soap opera fashion and slid to the floor, then laid the crying baby on the floor. My in laws ran in to see what the commotion was and my husband started calling the cops. i wasnt even thinking rationally, i was so overcome with emotions i grabbed his cellphone and slammed it to the ground and slapped him a few times before collapsing. I just remember asking how could you do this to me. I was charged with domestic violence, assault and battery, breaking and entering and aggravated assault on a minor. My in laws and husband collaberated with Jezebels fluffed up story of events. I had to spend 72 hours in jail for domestic violence. There are restraining orders in place for my children I’m being investigated by OCFS. My home is no longer my home.My clothing was tossed into garbage bags and left on the porch, i had to be escorted by the police to pick them up. Pictures, memorabilia, crafts from the kids are gone. I cant even afford a lawyer on my own. Im stayong in my parents house temporarily they’ll be home in a week from their vacation, i know I’ve disappointed them but hopefully they’ll help with a lawyer. I’ve made such a mess of my life. I have fallen so far in less than. month. Prayers, Advice. I’m devistated and depressed. I’m trying to just think of the previous life I’m carrying to get me through.
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I’m so sad about this whole situation and what you are facing and enduring.
Can only pray for you, and everything involved.
 
I saw my children yesterday in a room monitored by microphones and video footage. I had a police officer use a medal detector ad had to sign off on a list of rules. Among them I couldn’t ask anything too personal about their home or school life. I can’t whisper to them, all talk must be audible. I can’t have a cell phone or camera with me. Im watched like a criminal and all is recorded in their little file.

I’m in this situation because initially I had a lapse of judgment and if you read my other posts you know I lost my mind in the heat of the moment and the situation happened in front of the kids. That was what opened the child services case. Then my children were fed malicious lies about me that they repeated to the social workers. To top it off I have a history of depression and my husband turned that molehill into a mountain.

Normally I would have been legally evicted from my home but with the reatraining orders it didnt really matter.

Now back to the visit, while I can only ask incredibly vague questions they can of course tell me whatever they like. So for 2 hours I listened to my precious children I love with all my heart tell me about how great Jezebel and their new brother is. My oldest is excited about them renovating the house so she can have her own room. The younger two are telling me about how they plan to go to an amusement park in May. They tell me how great it is to finally have a brother oh and Jezebel is such a great cook! Daddy is home so much now and pucks them up from school.

😭😭😭
I just want my life back and I know it will never be the same. I never thought I’d be a struggling single mom with monitored visits and a possible criminal record. My parents are helping financially but I know theyre disappointed. God is the only one in my corner now.
 
AnaKate, this is all heartbreaking. You and your precious children remain in my prayers.
 
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