My husband's female friend

[bumby]

Thank you all for your posts. I asked my husband yesterday if he’d like me to talk to his friend and he said no, so that makes me think he is going to try and soften the blow a bit. I think I should give him a chance to tell her, but if, from her behaviour after he’s told her, she doesn’t change, I’m going to say something.

 

[AngelRS]

Well done, Bumby! :thumbsup:I find this woman’s behaviour rather dodgy myself and I’m NOT the jealous wife, type. Be sure to thank your husband for his cooperation in maintaining the distance, even if he doesn’t quite get just why Madame X makes you uneasy.

Keep that intuition pumping!

 

[ppcbill]

Hi, I wonder why nobody has posted about the sins of scandal or near occasion of sin. Being freinds is one thing but being alone with a single women is another. Even if your husband is trustworthy it sounds like she could easily tempt him.

 

[Matthew419]

Hi, I wonder why nobody has posted about the sins of scandal or near occasion of sin. Being freinds is one thing but being alone with a single women is another. Even if your husband is trustworthy it sounds like she could easily tempt him.

…I cannot get the phrase out of my head…and to avoid the near occasion of sin…for me I try to keep myself out of places and situations that could cause me to make to wrong decision based on sexual desire or any other desire that would compromise my marriage.

This phrase kept coming to me when I read the post. He may be innocent but in this scenario he is very venerable to temptation whether he admits it or not.

Bumby - keep praying about this but do not take a wait and see position. Defend your Sacrament of Marriage. IMHO this is most important.

In Christ,

Randy

 

[RachelKH]

i get so tired of people defending others for not putting their marriage and their spouse ahead of their ‘right’ to have opposite gender friends and do whatever they want, even if it makes their spouse uncomfortable or troubled due to where these selfish friendships and activities may lead. i am so glad to read the last few posts with their truth and understanding of proper marriage behavior!

Hi, I wonder why nobody has posted about the sins of scandal or near occasion of sin. Being friends is one thing but being alone with a single women is another. Even if your husband is trustworthy it sounds like she could easily tempt him.

He is NOT naive, he is just into the attention, he is flattered that 2 women want him. He is NOT thinking about you, your feelings don’t count. It is ridiculous for a wife to put up with this -----> you are watching your husband court another woman!!! Get real. You are the wife (the woman) in his life (or should be) that is what you signed up for. YOU DO NOT HAVE TO SHARE YOUR HUSBAND ----> You know this, end it now. This is behavior expected of teenagers, not married men. Let me say it one more time, this woman is after your husband, it is either you or her. Let him know you are not a dummy, don’t let them FOOL YOU. (((( GOD BLESS. ))))

As a married man I would NEVER go to a single woman’s house for drinks. Alcohol makes you relax your normal guard and could put your husband in a bad place. Men and women with alcohol in the midst can lead to “innocent” kisses, etc. Not good…

In my opinion you owe it to your marriage to discuss this with your husband. I cannot get the phrase out of my head…and to avoid the near occasion of sin…for me I try to keep myself out of places and situations that could cause me to make to wrong decision based on sexual desire or any other desire that would compromise my marriage.

As for the single woman you have a decision to make on whether to say anything to her.

She likes your husband and invites him over by himself for drinks.

You may trust your husband but he is potentially going down a path that could cause trouble. Clear the air with all parties. Some feelings may get bruised but a marriage is a holy Sacrament. All must be done to preserve this.

 

[bumby]

Thank you, last few posters, for your…posts! I understand my sacrament of marriage is to be defended - of course I want to defend it - but surely there is best way to do it? I’ve decided to trust my husband to do the right thing and by this I mean not be alone with this woman. He’s agreed to do this. Short of quitting my job and following him around, I can’t keep tabs on him to that extent - I have to trust him. I decided I trust him to tell her what’s what. I am going to pray a lot.

I do agree that if I say something to her, she will see it as a challenge and I do not want that. I want to befriend her so she too will have some kind of responsibility to me - as a friend. My husband also agrees that I come with him - we’re a pair - and he’s only going to go there with me.