All I can say is that I have been there, divorced against my will.
The best advice I got was although the Church does not approve of divorce, it does allow a spouse to DEFEND themselves in LEGAL proceedings.
A divorce is a LAWSUIT. Find a fantastic lawyer, and exercise your right to defend yourself. Even if he never follows through with executing final filing with the Court, you can lay the heavy consequences of his CHOICES upon him.
In the final year of my medical residency when she filed for divorce, I faced a grim prospect of owing her a lifetime of spousal support because of the disparity of our potential incomes (she had a PhD). My lawyer advised me to “oops, sorry, I didn’t pass my Medical boards”, so by the time we went before the Divorce Master, the calculation of my applicable income was 1/4 of the lifetime potential. An MD without a license is about equal to a science PhD in calculating income in the world of Pharmaceuticals.
See, at that point, the divorce could have been terminated, with her having the choice to finalize the divorce, or take into account getting ZERO spousal support for life and try and reconcile. But she chose to move forward anyway.
In the end her choices led her to commit suicide. I’m definitely not saying that’s what you aim for, but in mounting a strong legal defense that you are entitled to, you can open their eyes to the harsh realities that await them.
In your end, if he chooses to accept all the consequences, there was little to do anyway to stop him. But you absolutely do not have to be a doormat he steamrolls over.
