My new short film

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SignalPix

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I shot this short film the first couple weeks of June for a local short filmmaking contest. Wanted to share it with y’all. Love to hear your comments (both the good and bad).

So here it is: Forgotten (click link and scroll down a bit to see the film)

If you’re so inclined, please vote for the film here. Voting ends September 1, 2007. Hope you enjoy. Thanks.
 
what a pleasant surprise! I half expected a home-video type attempt, not knowing what the competition was.

The story you tell is very appropriate for our times. Did you write it too? I was moved by it and liked the way the actors portrayed their characters. You got my vote 😃

What can you tell us about this project and what winning would mean to you?

Are you a film student or something?
 
I found the film to be sentimental drivel meant to excuse prudence.
 
SignalPix said:
I shot this short film the first couple weeks of June for a local short filmmaking contest. Wanted to share it with y’all. Love to hear your comments (both the good and bad).

So here it is: Forgotten (click link and scroll down a bit to see the film)

If you’re so inclined, please vote for the film here. Voting ends September 1, 2007. Hope you enjoy. Thanks.
Click to expand...
I was very impressed with the quality of the film. You have an excellent way of handling the camera. I almost forgot I was watching a short film by a student. The title speaks for itself. Some people forget who they are and where they come from, even the clergy. You showed us a few ways we as humans can remember the words of our Lord and forgive each other. This is what I took from this piece. You should be very proud of your film. I was touched. Please let us know when you have something else completed, I would like to see it. 🙂
 
I loved it! And, being sentimental myself, 😉 you had me crying on my desk and wishing there was a part two.

Excellent work! Thank you so much for sharing this!

ETA - I voted for ya! Good luck! 🙂

~Liza
 
YinYangMom said:
what a pleasant surprise! I half expected a home-video type attempt, not knowing what the competition was.

The story you tell is very appropriate for our times. Did you write it too? I was moved by it and liked the way the actors portrayed their characters. You got my vote 😃

What can you tell us about this project and what winning would mean to you?

Are you a film student or something?
Click to expand...
Thanks for taking time to watch the short film, YinYangMom, and for your kind words! I didn’t write the script for Forgotten, a friend of mine in a local screenwriting group did.

The project was inititiated when a local contest was announced asking for screenwriter’s and filmmakers to make a short film revolving around the theme of “A twist of fate.” You can learn more about the contest, the ScreenLabs Challenge, here.

With regard to your final question, as an aspiring filmmaker, to win the contest would feel good because people liked our work, it would suggest that I’m improving as a storyteller, and that I may have a shot at creating a career in a business I love–movies. 🙂 Thanks for your questions, and for the vote!

–Chris
 
Other_Eric said:
I found the film to be sentimental drivel meant to excuse prudence.
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Hi, Other Eric. Thanks for watching, and for sharing your thoughts. I appreciate criticism as well as kudos. :tiphat: Do you have any suggestions as to how I might improve it?

–Chris
 
MichaelH said:
I was very impressed with the quality of the film. You have an excellent way of handling the camera. I almost forgot I was watching a short film by a student. The title speaks for itself. Some people forget who they are and where they come from, even the clergy. You showed us a few ways we as humans can remember the words of our Lord and forgive each other. This is what I took from this piece. You should be very proud of your film. I was touched. Please let us know when you have something else completed, I would like to see it. 🙂
Click to expand...
Wow, thanks MichaelH. I appreciate your kind words. I really like your point about how people sometime forget who they are and where they come from. One of the most satisfying parts about making this film has been hearing the varied reactions it receives. That’s one of the cool things about art, everybody can watch the same film and yet see something different in it. 🙂
 
lizaanne said:
I loved it! And, being sentimental myself, 😉 you had me crying on my desk and wishing there was a part two.

Excellent work! Thank you so much for sharing this!

ETA - I voted for ya! Good luck! 🙂

~Liza
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Hi, Lizaanne. Thanks for watching and sharing your thoughts. As an aspiring filmmaker it’s uplifting to hear your work has the potential to entertain and move people.

BTW, you’re not the first person to say they wanted to know what happened to these characters afterward. They felt like this was the opening to a feature-length version. Hmmm… :newidea:
 
I will admit that I too was wondering how this would turn out. However, I was very touched by the emotion that you could put into such a short amount of time. Being able to connect to the characters was a very easy thing to do. Seeing the nun (sorry I do not remember her name) and her “attitude” towards the girl made everything tie together like it should.

I think that you have a great talent! I wish you all the success and hope that you continue to make good quality films like this.
 
SignalPix said:
Hi, Other Eric. Thanks for watching, and for sharing your thoughts. I appreciate criticism as well as kudos. :tiphat: Do you have any suggestions as to how I might improve it?

–Chris
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As I said, to my mind the ending excuses the imprudence of a nun allowing a stranger with some serious and potentially dangerous problems shelter under the roof of the convent. It leaves hanging the logistical problems of what is going to happen to the girl come dawn and whether or not this girl’s reconnection with her past will serve any sort of palpable conversion beyond the fleeting emotions of the moment.

I would rather that the nun, after having read the inscription, turn to the girl and tell her that as she now remembers that she is made in the image and likeness of God, that she ought to begin to act like it. Then, use whatever artistic imagery you are capable of to best convey a firm purpose of amendment in the girl and end the film there.
 
Mirror_Mirror said:
I will admit that I too was wondering how this would turn out. However, I was very touched by the emotion that you could put into such a short amount of time. Being able to connect to the characters was a very easy thing to do. Seeing the nun (sorry I do not remember her name) and her “attitude” towards the girl made everything tie together like it should.

I think that you have a great talent! I wish you all the success and hope that you continue to make good quality films like this.
Click to expand...
Hi, Mirror Mirror. Thanks for viewing the film and sharing your kind words. 🙂 If you’re so inclined, please vote for Forgotten in this online short film contest I’m participating in.

–Chris
 
SignalPix said:
Hi, Mirror Mirror. Thanks for viewing the film and sharing your kind words. 🙂 If you’re so inclined, please vote for Forgotten in this online short film contest I’m participating in.

–Chris
Click to expand...
I voted for yours and saw that you are in the lead!! :extrahappy:

Good for you. I hope you win! What would you win?
 
Other_Eric said:
As I said, to my mind the ending excuses the imprudence of a nun allowing a stranger with some serious and potentially dangerous problems shelter under the roof of the convent. It leaves hanging the logistical problems of what is going to happen to the girl come dawn and whether or not this girl’s reconnection with her past will serve any sort of palpable conversion beyond the fleeting emotions of the moment.

I would rather that the nun, after having read the inscription, turn to the girl and tell her that as she now remembers that she is made in the image and likeness of God, that she ought to begin to act like it. Then, use whatever artistic imagery you are capable of to best convey a firm purpose of amendment in the girl and end the film there.
Click to expand...
Hi, Other Eric. Thanks for sharing your thoughts on what doesn’t work in the short film. They are good points that, in real life, should be taken into account. However, if Sister Michael had turned out the young girl in this story (or in real life) in the middle of the night what would that say about the Sister? Not to mention it would be a downer of an ending. 😦

–Chris
 
Mirror_Mirror said:
I voted for yours and saw that you are in the lead!! :extrahappy:

Good for you. I hope you win! What would you win?
Click to expand...
Thanks, Mirror Mirror! The short film Blind Fate, which is strong competition, has pulled back into the lead today. :ouch: I think the prize is $1500 (which would go a long way toward defraying the costs of production).

–Chris
 
Other_Eric said:
As I said, to my mind the ending excuses the imprudence of a nun allowing a stranger with some serious and potentially dangerous problems shelter under the roof of the convent. It leaves hanging the logistical problems of what is going to happen to the girl come dawn and whether or not this girl’s reconnection with her past will serve any sort of palpable conversion beyond the fleeting emotions of the moment.
Click to expand...
It’s interesting that you relate to the nun’s initial instinct about the girl, that by associating with her danger could befall the convent. I never considered the girl a threat, as it was clear the guy in the car was a boyfriend, not a pimp, drug dealer or gangster.

As for leaving hanging what happens, well that’s the point…this way people will ask the director for more, at which time the story can show what happens.

I imagine the girl will have a safe place to sleep for the night, have breakfast with the nuns, share in their prayer routine for the morning, and then be sent on her way to rebuild her life.
I would rather that the nun, after having read the inscription, turn to the girl and tell her that as she now remembers that she is made in the image and likeness of God, that she ought to begin to act like it. Then, use whatever artistic imagery you are capable of to best convey a firm purpose of amendment in the girl and end the film there.
Click to expand...
I can see that an extra expression on the girls’ face showing an intent to reform would have been a touch better. But I interpreted her tears at the tombstone to convey that intent.

SignalPix,
I’ve seen the film several times now, as I’ve forwarded it to friends and family, and I must say the one obvious flaw is the girl’s audio. She is very difficult to hear. It seems the microphone was closest to the nun throughout the film because I heard everything she said at a volume relative to the surrounding sounds, but the girl and the other nun were too soft. We found ourselves having to return to those parts to turn up the volume and then having to turn down the volume when the first nun spoke. I haven’t viewed your top competitor’s film yet. It will be interesting to see if it has no technical glitches at all.
 
SignalPix said:
I shot this short film the first couple weeks of June for a local short filmmaking contest. Wanted to share it with y’all. Love to hear your comments (both the good and bad).

So here it is: Forgotten (click link and scroll down a bit to see the film)

If you’re so inclined, please vote for the film here. Voting ends September 1, 2007. Hope you enjoy. Thanks.
Click to expand...
Beautiful! 👍
 
YinYangMom said:
It’s interesting that you relate to the nun’s initial instinct about the girl, that by associating with her danger could befall the convent. I never considered the girl a threat, as it was clear the guy in the car was a boyfriend, not a pimp, drug dealer or gangster.

As for leaving hanging what happens, well that’s the point…this way people will ask the director for more, at which time the story can show what happens.

I imagine the girl will have a safe place to sleep for the night, have breakfast with the nuns, share in their prayer routine for the morning, and then be sent on her way to rebuild her life.

I can see that an extra expression on the girls’ face showing an intent to reform would have been a touch better. But I interpreted her tears at the tombstone to convey that intent.

SignalPix,
I’ve seen the film several times now, as I’ve forwarded it to friends and family, and I must say the one obvious flaw is the girl’s audio. She is very difficult to hear. It seems the microphone was closest to the nun throughout the film because I heard everything she said at a volume relative to the surrounding sounds, but the girl and the other nun were too soft. We found ourselves having to return to those parts to turn up the volume and then having to turn down the volume when the first nun spoke. I haven’t viewed your top competitor’s film yet. It will be interesting to see if it has no technical glitches at all.
Click to expand...
Hello again, YingYangMom. 🙂 I was glad you picked up on some of the ambiguities in the piece, and our interest in raising questions in the audiences mind but not giving definitive answers.

With regard to the audio, there are portions on the bus that I’m unhappy about. I have posted the film on my website with (hopefully) improved audio. Check it out here and let me know what you think.

Finally, thanks so much for forwarding it to friends and family. If I can be so bold, please encourage them to vote too! :blushing:

–Chris
 
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