My super Protestant grandma

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Brockman1996

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I am 16 and about to start RCIA. My whole family is majority southern baptists with a few non religious. My parents agreed to let me become Catholic and go to Mass ( but they weren’t happy). My Mom allowed it because my Grandma forced her to go to the Pentecostal church when she was my age and she had bad experiences and didn’t want to do the same to me as my Grandma did to her. My Grandma found out I was attending Mass well when that happened it hit the fan. She came at me with all these lies about the Catholic Church and since I researched the faith thoroughly before I joined to know if it was the truth I destroyed her arguments completely. Now since she can’t beat me in a debate she is calling
my Mom and telling her she needs to talk with me and stop letting me go to Mass. Well she told her no but she keeps calling her about me and texting me all the time (11 times during Sunday Mass:mad:) with verses of the Bible (out of context). I’m one more call away from telling her to mind her own business and leave me alone and my Mom alone. What do you think ?
 
Brockman1996 said:
I am 16 and about to start RCIA. My whole family is majority southern baptists with a few non religious. My parents agreed to let me become Catholic and go to Mass ( but they weren’t happy). My Mom allowed it because my Grandma forced her to go to the Pentecostal church when she was my age and she had bad experiences and didn’t want to do the same to me as my Grandma did to her. My Grandma found out I was attending Mass well when that happened it hit the fan. She came at me with all these lies about the Catholic Church and since I researched the faith thoroughly before I joined to know if it was the truth I destroyed her arguments completely. Now since she can’t beat me in a debate she is calling
my Mom and telling her she needs to talk with me and stop letting me go to Mass. Well she told her no but she keeps calling her about me and texting me all the time (11 times during Sunday Mass:mad:) with verses of the Bible (out of context). I’m one more call away from telling her to mind her own business and leave me alone and my Mom alone. What do you think ?
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Well, it sure would be good if your mother could draw that line for her own mother…It would help your mom to do that, since your grandmother violated your mom’s boundaries when she was a girl. Can you just put her phone numbers on block? If it comes down to it, and you have to put a stop to the nonsense, do it charitably. “Grandmother, while I respect your opinion, I am going to ask you to stop trying to talk me out of my faith. If you can’t drop the subject, I am going to have to block you on my phone. I don’t want to do that, but I’m tired of this harassment.”

Be sure to talk to your mom and thank her for sticking up for you!

Welcome home!!!

:love::extrahappy:
 
Go for it, but do it tactfully and respectfully.

Welcome Home. 🙂
 
Brockman1996 said:
I am 16 and about to start RCIA. My whole family is majority southern baptists with a few non religious. My parents agreed to let me become Catholic and go to Mass ( but they weren’t happy). My Mom allowed it because my Grandma forced her to go to the Pentecostal church when she was my age and she had bad experiences and didn’t want to do the same to me as my Grandma did to her. My Grandma found out I was attending Mass well when that happened it hit the fan. She came at me with all these lies about the Catholic Church and since I researched the faith thoroughly before I joined to know if it was the truth I destroyed her arguments completely. Now since she can’t beat me in a debate she is calling
my Mom and telling her she needs to talk with me and stop letting me go to Mass. Well she told her no but she keeps calling her about me and texting me all the time (11 times during Sunday Mass:mad:) with verses of the Bible (out of context). I’m one more call away from telling her to mind her own business and leave me alone and my Mom alone. What do you think ?
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Practice Charity. It would be disrespectful to tell your grandmother to leave you and your mother alone. Instead, answer her texts by putting them in context. Perhaps, you will someday bring her to the truth. Randomly, for no reason at all, send her a text of 1 Corinthians chapter 13, one verse at a time, and pray for her. Your prayers will do more good than shunning her.

🙂
 
First, “I understand completely”, most of my and my wifes extended family are about as happy as your family of our decision. As to mass turn your cell phone off anyway 🙂 ].

Understand they do this precisely because they love you and are concerned about you, no matter how misguided they may be. Let them know you understand that and appreciate their concern. Odds are they’ve never known a Catholic up close and personal.

Pray. Its far more effective than argument.
 
Brockman1996 said:
I am 16 and about to start RCIA. My whole family is majority southern baptists with a few non religious. My parents agreed to let me become Catholic and go to Mass ( but they weren’t happy). My Mom allowed it because my Grandma forced her to go to the Pentecostal church when she was my age and she had bad experiences and didn’t want to do the same to me as my Grandma did to her. My Grandma found out I was attending Mass well when that happened it hit the fan. She came at me with all these lies about the Catholic Church and since I researched the faith thoroughly before I joined to know if it was the truth I destroyed her arguments completely.

Now since she can’t beat me in a debate she is calling my Mom and telling her she needs to talk with me and stop letting me go to Mass. Well she told her no but she keeps calling her about me and texting me all the time (11 times during Sunday Mass:mad:) with verses of the Bible (out of context). I’m one more call away from telling her to mind her own business and leave me alone and my Mom alone. What do you think ?
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I know this is hard advice to swallow, but don’t allow yourself to be dragged into a pointless doctrinal conflict.

God will not allow anyone to stop you. If you’re ready, and it’s his will that this is the right time, then you will be Catholic. Thus saith the Lord.

And, as much as she might deserve it you may not tell her off. At the end of the day she is still your grandmother and you are obligated to respect her. In these circumstances you shouldn’t even be debating with her let alone ‘destroying her arguments.’

As someone who can be very quick-tempered and impatient, I sometimes struggle to pick my battles. But unfortunately, you need to be the bigger person here. You are “the Catholic” in the family, and trust me, you’ll want your relatives to remember your maturity.

Nevertheless, you are by no means required to suffer grandmum’s B.S. Simply delete the offending messages. Be courteous and have little to say in her company. In the meantime, take the opportunity for spiritual exercise and pray for her before bed.

And don’t forget to smile. 🙂
 
Brockman1996 said:
I am 16 and about to start RCIA. My whole family is majority southern baptists with a few non religious. My parents agreed to let me become Catholic and go to Mass ( but they weren’t happy). My Mom allowed it because my Grandma forced her to go to the Pentecostal church when she was my age and she had bad experiences and didn’t want to do the same to me as my Grandma did to her. My Grandma found out I was attending Mass well when that happened it hit the fan. She came at me with all these lies about the Catholic Church and since I researched the faith thoroughly before I joined to know if it was the truth I destroyed her arguments completely. Now since she can’t beat me in a debate she is calling
my Mom and telling her she needs to talk with me and stop letting me go to Mass. Well she told her no but she keeps calling her about me and texting me all the time (11 times during Sunday Mass:mad:) with verses of the Bible (out of context). I’m one more call away from telling her to mind her own business and leave me alone and my Mom alone. What do you think ?
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WELCOME HOME!!!

Great job on defeating your grandmother’s arguments! 🙂
She needs to accept the fact that you’re going to be a Catholic whether she likes it or not. Just keep finding the falseness about her arguments and tell her the truth. 😃
 
You can go before the Tabernacle now and pray for your grandmother. You can go to adoration of the Blessed Sacrament and do the same. Very powerful.

You can also get grandma a copy of Catholicism for Dummies and ask her politely to read it. The ball will be in her court. Ask her if she calls the non-religious members as much as she calls you. If not, ask her why not.
 
pure_angel said:
WELCOME HOME!!!

Great job on defeating your grandmother’s arguments! 🙂
She needs to accept the fact that you’re going to be a Catholic whether she likes it or not. Just keep finding the falseness about her arguments and tell her the truth. 😃
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Not a good idea.
 
pure_angel said:
WELCOME HOME!!!

Great job on defeating your grandmother’s arguments! 🙂
She needs to accept the fact that you’re going to be a Catholic whether she likes it or not. Just keep finding the falseness about her arguments and tell her the truth. 😃
Click to expand...
Bad idea.
 
TheRealJuliane said:
Well, it sure would be good if your mother could draw that line for her own mother…It would help your mom to do that, since your grandmother violated your mom’s boundaries when she was a girl. Can you just put her phone numbers on block? If it comes down to it, and you have to put a stop to the nonsense, do it charitably. “Grandmother, while I respect your opinion, I am going to ask you to stop trying to talk me out of my faith. If you can’t drop the subject, I am going to have to block you on my phone. I don’t want to do that, but I’m tired of this harassment.”

Be sure to talk to your mom and thank her for sticking up for you!

Welcome home!!!

:love::extrahappy:
Click to expand...
Mary: This is a great post; I’d try this approach; it’s considerate and direct to the point.
 
Brockman1996 said:
I am 16 and about to start RCIA. My whole family is majority southern baptists with a few non religious. My parents agreed to let me become Catholic and go to Mass ( but they weren’t happy). My Mom allowed it because my Grandma forced her to go to the Pentecostal church when she was my age and she had bad experiences and didn’t want to do the same to me as my Grandma did to her. My Grandma found out I was attending Mass well when that happened it hit the fan. She came at me with all these lies about the Catholic Church and since I researched the faith thoroughly before I joined to know if it was the truth I destroyed her arguments completely. Now since she can’t beat me in a debate she is calling
my Mom and telling her she needs to talk with me and stop letting me go to Mass. Well she told her no but she keeps calling her about me and texting me all the time (11 times during Sunday Mass:mad:) with verses of the Bible (out of context). I’m one more call away from telling her to mind her own business and leave me alone and my Mom alone. What do you think ?
Click to expand...
Warn your grandma of the dangers of remaining outside the body of Christ. Christ created One Holy Catholic and Apostolic Church. If she denies this then she will not be saved. But it will not be anyones fault but her own, for rejecting the Truth of Jesus Christ. Use www.scripturecatholic(dot)com as a good reference when wanting to use Scripture to share the Truth of Catholicism in its proper and only context.
 
Bezant said:
Bad idea.
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I totally agree it would be a bad idea to argue and score points.

I believe there is no point in arguing anything. If it’s a matter of fact, then time will prove who is right, or look it up if it’s that kind of fact,

If it’s a matter of opinion - nobody is convinced by argument, or very rarely. certainly not at the time. A few years later? Who knows? But it’s so easy for arguments to get nasty, so avoid them.

So don’t argue. Just be a good example of Catholic behaviour - I don’t mean going to church every five minutes, but being kind and patient.

Above all, remember that faith is a GIFT. It’s the Holy Spirit who convinces someone of the truth, not us. So pray, and let God be God.
 
(Caveat–haven’t read the other posts!)

May I add to the discussion?

I’m almost 40. My grandmother was on-and-off Evangelical Protestant. I converted to Judaism as a teen. I feel you. I absolutely do.

Let me tell you bluntly: The morning of June 2 of this year I held my grandmother as she died from pancreatic cancer. The day before her legs turned cold. She was in and out of consciousness. Her breath petered out. Just before she died her tongue turned black and bile spilled from her mouth.

I have rued every harsh word and action toward her. I have mourned time I didn’t spend with her because I was angry with her or just too lazy to call or go visit.

Was our relationship great? No. She lived in the same town of 700 people her whole life. She was set in her ways. She didn’t like me going to graduate school and attempting to “rise above [my] station.” She rarely gave me praise.

All that being said, she did the best she could and was determined to guide me how she thought was better. Was it always in a healthy way? No. But she did the best she could and I see that now.

Be kind to your grandmother. I often read here about evangelization. That’s what she is doing. She strongly believes the Catholic Church is wrong and she is going to fight tooth and nail to save her granddaughter. Please understand that. She is going to bat for you. She loves you that much she is willing to fight you for your soul. How wonderful!

My advice is to be gracious. Be loving. Model a Christ-like attitude. Show her how you are growing in faith and be the person God calls you to be. Your Christian love will show through. Pray for her. Pray for yourself, for equanimity and poise. Live so that some day she can say, “Wow. Catholics really have Christ’s love and are a light unto the world!” Give her positives: Be able to talk the Bible with her, NOT debate. Connect on what you agree. Share pro-life ideals. Tell her some generalities you’ve learned that you know will not cause debate (“I have learned how God does not want me to have a physical relationship before marriage” or “I have learned Christ teaches against abortion.”)

Do what you can. Love her now. She won’t be with you forever. Don’t have regrets and guilt. Love her. Let her know you love her.

Keep us updated. Will keep you all in prayers.

:hug1:

SM
 
Bezant said:
I know this is hard advice to swallow, but don’t allow yourself to be dragged into a pointless doctrinal conflict.

God will not allow anyone to stop you. If you’re ready, and it’s his will that this is the right time, then you will be Catholic. Thus saith the Lord.

And, as much as she might deserve it you may not tell her off. At the end of the day she is still your grandmother and you are obligated to respect her. In these circumstances you shouldn’t even be debating with her let alone ‘destroying her arguments.’

As someone who can be very quick-tempered and impatient, I sometimes struggle to pick my battles. But unfortunately, you need to be the bigger person here. You are “the Catholic” in the family, and trust me, you’ll want your relatives to remember your maturity.

Nevertheless, you are by no means required to suffer grandmum’s B.S. Simply delete the offending messages. Be courteous and have little to say in her company. In the meantime, take the opportunity for spiritual exercise and pray for her before bed.

And don’t forget to smile. 🙂
Click to expand...
This. 👍
 
SurlyMermaid said:
Do what you can. Love her now. She won’t be with you forever. Don’t have regrets and guilt. Love her. Let her know you love her.

Keep us updated. Will keep you all in prayers.

:hug1:

SM
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Well said. 👍

To add to what you said, there’s a proverb that says, “When an old person dies, a library burns.”

It’s true. Grandparents are a source of history linking the old generation to the future generation. When their generation passes, so does that wealth of knowledge.
 
Is there anyway you can just go on as you are? If you have the answers to her concerns then I don’t really see the problem. If she’s really bothering your mom, let your mom deal with it. I would answer the phone when I feel like it and carry on with my life. Now, if your grandma’s language becomes abusive, then that’s another story.
 
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