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MrZetterlund
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You’re a woman I presume.
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Rascalking
Guest
Whatevergirl is never wrong. Period. This should be a mantra to all of us.
OP-Dude, I feel for you, but calling her the devil and talking about trading her in for a newer model isn’t cool.
Never, ever, ever, think that a mortal is the devil-the true devil probably loves that.
Get both of yourselves to a good counselor. Pronto
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whatevergirl
Guest
TOP–Oh, I meant to add above…so it’s not misunderstood…that I didn’t mean to imply that ‘‘it doesn’t matter what happens in a marriage,’’ as in a general sense. Of course, it matters what both led you to where you are! lol I meant that there is never an excuse to abuse someone, verbally or physically. Everyone can have a bad day, week, month. But, it sounds like how you are being treated, has grown into a pattern. I truly hope you both can find some common ground to try to work with, and may your marriage get better…that is always my hope. But, if it doesn’t…know that tolerating abuse is not healthy, and it’s not wrong of you to want better for yourself, and your marriage. Take care, again, praying for you both. 
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MrZetterlund
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Ok, aren’t we kinda blaming the victom here? I mean think about it, why call her the devil? Maybe… becaus she’s so anti-christ?
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Joseph_L_Varga
Guest
I also feel bad about several posts in this thread. If a woman came here, telling us that she is verbally and physically abused, and she sleeps on the couch, wouldn’t our primary concern be to empower her, to get to a point where she is safe and free of abuse? That’s exactly what we should do for TOP, and that’s where our primary concern should be at this moment. He needs to do something now, call the police, get a lawyer, separate, whatever it takes to stop the abuse. And being a man in this case has the added awkwardness that a lot of people won’t understand: women do abuse men occasionally, and men need protection just like women do. It seems to me that TOP is a military guy or veteran. He could probably crush his wife’s skull if he wanted to, but he holds back. And his wife probably misses the clue and keeps pushing forward. So, how do you stop this, if you as a guy don’t want to physically fight back and injure the woman who is the mother of your children?
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graceandglory
Guest
I still say there are two sides to every story. It’s a common MO for abusive men to feign being abused.
Bottom line, you have free will, if you don’t want to be married to her, be a man and own it. If you are really concerned for your welfare call a real abuse agency and get real help. Marital counseling is NOT recommended for ABUSE.
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graceandglory
Guest
Yes, and an abuse survivor.You’re a woman I presume.
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eucharisteo
Guest
True. But I think he’s venting. I can relate having done similar things. He doesn’t have someone to vent to so he jumped on here to get it out so it doesn’t come out against her. He’s trying I bet. I since a bit of sarcastic humor in the tone of his message.
Look into E-5men.org Own up to being a husband and father. The next time you want to say something about God to her do it gently and non-judgmental towards others. Show her love always even when she hurts you. Most of all pray for her and let her see you actually pray. Live Christ like, not just say it.
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Try2beholy
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I have been praying for family and friends conversion using the green scapular (recommended by a priest). Place the green scapular under her bed and pray the prayer every day. My son, who has been out of the church for 14 years is getting his marriage blessed and my granddaughter baptized this month. I have been praying the prayer for a year. You can find the green scapular at Rose Scapular online. God bless.
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TOP
Guest
And the Lord said to St. Faustina, “seek no comfort in creatures”. When will I ever learn?!!
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Snerticus
Guest
LOL, I suppose that is true. There are times when I post on these forums and expect everyone to agree with me and all I get is flack. Yet there are also times when I’m hesitant to post because I don’t think many people will understand and I really expect to get a lot of flack, and then everyone agrees with me.
You’re not alone. Just seek out a priest and tell him your story. I’ll bet he can give you a good direction to head in…
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MrZetterlund
Guest
So is my mom. And no offence, but I do notice that abuse survivors tend to carry a chip on their shoulder about the other sex. Mr. “my devil wife” over here doesn’t really sound like the abusive type. Especially considering his wife is supposedly “so bad.” If he was the abusive type, I don’t think his wife would be able to fight back.
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MrZetterlund
Guest
She most certainly is if she denies the holy Spirit.
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graceandglory
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I will say it for a third time. There are two sides to every story. We have only heard one.
By the way, just a hint. If you have to preface something with “no offence” it will probably be offensive.
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MrZetterlund
Guest
Yes, but when you deny the holy Spirit there is only one other side. Satan!
And sorry, but sometimes the truth hurts. But I don’t say that because I wan’t to hurt you. But because the truth sets you free. I’ve seen many cases where the victum becomes the antagonist. And what’s worse is that the victum is blinded by a motive that seems right to them.
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eucharisteo
Guest
Maybe he meant to emphasize the offense… make sure he got it across…that’s my use…sometimes. And if there is a story involving only 2 people that are at least 2 sides to the story. But what if there are 100 people involved?
I doubt that there would be only 2 sides to the story. 
Abuse?
Sounds to me that TOP needs to work things out with the wife. Sounds like she’s mad at you about something you failed to mention. You best try to find out what’s eating her up? I mean deep down. And don’t take the pompous high road of I’m holier than my spouse. Holiness involves sacrifice.
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Salonika
Guest
Joseph L Varga:
But whatever their age children have the right to live in an abuse-free environment and one where the parents fight and constantly put each other down is an abuseful environment. And even worse is when parents try/force the child or children to take sides.
Also people tend to live up to their labels - so a husband calling his wife the devil escalates not defuses the situation.
I agree. Also while some people still say that “sticks and stones may hurt my bones but names will never hurt me” I suspect that they are ones who have not been on the receiving end of constant puts down etc.
I also wondered about whether were there were children still at home - looked through the thread to find this out but missed the answer if it was there. Did pick up that the wife had been a sahm for15 years so its likely that the children are older rather than younger.
But whatever their age children have the right to live in an abuse-free environment and one where the parents fight and constantly put each other down is an abuseful environment. And even worse is when parents try/force the child or children to take sides.
Also people tend to live up to their labels - so a husband calling his wife the devil escalates not defuses the situation.
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Tosk
Guest
It’s strange comparing these answers with the responses most women receive when they allege abuse.
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flyingfish
Guest
To be fair to the responders, the OP is also very unlike the posts of women who allege abuse. The women tend to give a lot of details about the physical or verbal abuse and how it affects them, how afraid they are, how their mental health is affected. People tend to read that, feel sympathy of the poster, anger at the perpetrator, and start telling the woman to leave man and contact the police.
The OP did not give any details except mentioning that the wife blames him for having been a SAHM and insults his faith. The title of the OP is also a bit confrontational. Plus, everyone has grown up with the belief that men are much stronger than women and can’t really be physically hurt by them.
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whatevergirl
Guest
*The OP is not a woman…his wife is the abusive one, from the sounds of it. *
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