Need Help Resolving Rehearsal Dinner Conflict

[UbiCaritas]

Whoa. Starting out a marriage with the assumption that parents are “interfering” is a sure recipe for a broken relationship! I strongly believe that one of the reasons that divorce has become so prevalent, even in the Church, is that families move far away from their extended family and don’t see their parents and grandparents as a resource for building a strong marriage. There is a fine line between leave & cleave and completely breaking the bond of family. Charity - and assuming the best of people - begins at home!

I don’t know about that. I think I get along better with my in-laws than 99% of the population do, but I also think that’s in no small part because they live over a thousand miles away. They have their own way of understanding and doing things, and it worked very well for them and their family, which is great. However, I have a different perspective on a lot of things and prefer to do some things my way, and they believe that their way is just about always the best way of doing things for everyone, no exceptions. With distance, we can remain cordial and not have all those little things brought up constantly. Visits can be spent enjoying one another’s company, rather than being so long or so frequent as to be irritated by the other person’s way of doing things. This level of distance also leads naturally to better boundaries.

I will say that one reason I wish they lived closer was so that DD could get to spend more time with them than she does.

 

[Anglewannabe]

I strongly believe that one of the reasons that divorce has become so prevalent, even in the Church, is that families move far away from their extended family and don’t see their parents and grandparents as a resource for building a strong marriage.

I think it totally depends on the family. When I was a kid, my closet relative (outside of my immediate family) lived 500 miles away. My mom swears that is why her marriage worked