Need some tips on how to trust more in the Lord

Status
Not open for further replies.
T

Tis_Bearself

Patron
I have been working for some months on having more trust in the Lord. I pretty much have to trust in the Lord, because a lot of things in life are not within my control anyway. Some things I can do something about, like home repairs, but other things like whether a loved one dies or some disaster happens are not up to me and never were.

I try to follow the advice of Padre Pio to “Pray, hope, and don’t worry”. I do OK with the “Pray” and “Hope” parts, but because I have always had a tendency to think about multiple trolley cars full of disaster coming over the next hill, the “don’t worry” part is challenging for me. Some days I do better than others, and some of this also seems to be related to biology, such as food-related ups and downs. I know for example if I drink some coffee I will likely feel less anxious, but I do not want to rely on any chemical and I refuse to go the route of doctors and pills, which in my observation only leads to more doctors and more pills and more possible side effects (no dis on those who benefit from going that route, it is just not for me).

I have found some of the recent Mass readings to be helpful, such as “Be stouthearted and wait for the Lord” and various other ones expressing trust in the Lord.
I pray daily, go to Adoration a couple times a week, daily Mass as much as I can, etc.
I try to take all of my issues to the Lord and put them in His hands as much as possible (Or in the hands of Mother Mary since I have devotion to her).
Sometimes this works and I feel very peaceful, and sometimes it doesn’t and I’m still a nervous wreck no matter how hard I try to “let go”.

Anybody got suggestions, or something specific they themselves do, for building trust in the Lord and worrying less, especially when faced with big challenges in life?
 
Tis_Bearself said:
I have been working for some months on having more trust in the Lord. I pretty much have to trust in the Lord, because a lot of things in life are not within my control anyway. Some things I can do something about, like home repairs, but other things like whether a loved one dies or some disaster happens are not up to me and never were.
Click to expand...
I recommend a book called Arise From Darkness by Father Groeschel.
 
I’m sure you are familiar with the verses from Philippians 4 (NABRE):
4 Rejoice[d] in the Lord always. I shall say it again: rejoice! 5 Your kindness should be known to all. The Lord is near. 6 Have no anxiety at all, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, make your requests known to God. 7 Then the peace of God that surpasses all understanding will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.
Click to expand...
I try to follow these verses. I also have had the belief for a long time that when a person tries to do God’s work, He sustains him/her. Part of that takes discernment which is an effort that sometimes seems to go well and sometimes doesn’t. And part of it is, as you say you try to do, “letting go.” In my experience, when I trusted in God instead of my own strength to the point of not seeing how things could possibly work out I left Him the opening to show me just how amazing He can be in surprising and sustaining us.

I know, Tis, you do God’s work at least in part by all the (name removed by moderator)ut you give at CAF. I don’t know your energy level or all your other obligations, and perhaps you have gone through much discernment already. For me, discernment is an ongoing process and we have to be careful to walk with God and not get ahead of Him. If He is calling you for one thing, don’t try to do ten things. Perhaps the times you feel peace can be helpful for inner direction.
 
The general question of “trusting the Lord” arises most when we find ourselves in a difficult moment with several factors “out of our control” or perhaps even more “beyond being foreseeable”.

I found myself sometimes in that situation, with important things essential to my life entirely beyond my control.

With that comes naturally: Worries about the future and anxiety ensuing. If to this one adds loneliness or isolation, or sadness that person is indeed in a difficult moment.

Well, perhaps the first thing after separating the factors is the pragmatic thought that anxiety (worrying about the future) isn’t going to help. Best thing is to methodically take care of business on day at a time. The things you foresee “without solution” can invite catastrophic thinking, and that brings with it a sensation of “paralysis” which is the worst that can happen. There is always a solution, and another person would be quick at seeing through it and taking the necessary steps. I know you are a professional, but perhaps hiring a good accountant or a lawyer to take care of some specific problem will take a huge burden of your shoulders and ensure a swift resolution that otherwise could be exhausting for you, taking a toll altogether not worthwhile. A small expense hiring professional help can go a long way in saving on a medical bill.
 
adgloriam said:
Well, perhaps the first thing after separating the factors is the pragmatic thought that anxiety (worrying about the future) isn’t going to help. Best thing is to methodically take care of business on day at a time.
Click to expand...
This is actually a great thought and has kept me from various self destructive behaviors in the past as well as now. I tried to go into detail but the details made my post go into the “needs moderator approval” black hole 😃

I have the accounting and law covered…I need more reliable guys who mow lawns though!
 
I struggle so much with this myself. I completely understand how you feel. My frequent worrying is a heavy cross I bear. I’ve found that simply praying, “Lord, I don’t understand why you’ve brought me to this place but please help me through it” can be an effective prayer. I also will sit down and make a mental (sometimes physical) list of everything that’s good in my life versus every “worst case” scenario I can imagine. It often helps put things in perspective. I will pray for you, please pray for me as well. God bless.
 
I know exactly how you feel. In addition to what you’re already doing, saying the Surrender Novena by Father Don Dolindo Ruotolo is what helps me the most. It really helps put things in perspective. Reading through the Novena throughout the day whenever you feel anxious is really helpful. It really helps me to continually take a deep breath and give back the whole lump of worry back into God’s hands. Every time the worrying thoughts come into your mind, acknowledge them and hand them back to Jesus. Surrender it all to Him and let Him worry about it. That’s been the most effective way for me to handle it.

“O Jesus, I surrender myself to you,
take care of everything!”

https://catholicdoors.com/prayers/novenas/p03530.htm

*You can also print out verses that speak about trusting in the Lord and tape them around the house so you can see them and be reminded.

I’m going to say a prayer for you right now. Have a blessed day today! :hugs:
 
I’m a single woman with a full time demanding career, house (100 year old; I’m restoring it), garden, etc. It can be a struggle to balance all, and I am also a worrier by nature (it runs in the family). The best advice I can give is the following: I say the Rosary daily for peace (among other intentions); give all my household issues and financial decisions to St. Joseph daily (I can’t tell you how he helps, in the most mundane and practical matters); and pray daily before the image of the Divine Mercy (“Jesus, I trust in You.”)

And yes, a good handyman is hard to find and worth his (or her) weight in gold. Keep asking around, including at the local hardware store.
 
Last edited:
Tis_Bearself said:
Anybody got suggestions, or something specific they themselves do, for building trust in the Lord and worrying less, especially when faced with big challenges in life?
Click to expand...
Not a lot of suggestions, and it’s something I need to work on.

I am in a hurry at the moment, so can’t think it through and write a lot, but briefly it’s this: There is some kind of balancing act we all need to perform. To get along in life, we need a certain level of control, planning, expectations, and so on. If we overdo it, we might worry and work ourselves to the point of exhaustion. If we go the other way and get too relaxed, we might not attend to the work that needs to be done. How do we find the “just right” level of control?

I think it is not entirely a conscious decision. Our brains (neurology, psychology, biology?) are wired or programmed for planning and control, and I suspect there are built-in regulators that are supposed to balance opposing tendencies like fear and hope, worry and trust, carefulness and boldness, and so on. In some individuals, the balance tilts one way, while in others it tilts the other way. We can shift the balance by conscious efforts like reasoning, eating right, praying, and getting enough sleep.

I was wondering if it also helps to simply recognize that deep in the human brain, there is a primitive little lobe that was designed thousands of years ago to worry about predators, hostile tribes, food shortages, bad weather, and disease. Now that we have most of those problems licked, the worry lobe is looking for other things to worry about.

Gotta run now, but I’ll be back.
 
Tis_Bear! How touching how you reach out to your community of friends to encourage you on your journey to Christ.

Oh man, talk about worry, I’m a worry wort … had a huge bout of ulcers last year. As I was sitting in the hospital bed, the doc looked at me and just said, “maybe you stress and worry a lot”

I’ve always heard stress and worry can cause ulcers, but mine was a combo effect, food, smoking and stressing.

My brother rolled his eyes at me, wondering what it is that I have to worry about, told me, straight up, “give it up to the Lord”. Easily said! Still working on it.

But, I have noticed a huge difference in my own attitude and outlook since my bout last December. Ommagosh, we were late to Mass a few times and I just strolled in with my family instead of getting all bent out of shape because my 7 year old was dragging her feet and made us 3 minutes late.

Still working on it, offer the stress, offer the worry, put the worry in Jesus’ hands, make a deal, stuff like, “I’ll do my part, you (Jesus) do the stress part, and together, we’ll get through this day”

Blessings Bear.
 
Thanks everyone. These are all great suggestions and I appreciate very much knowing there are others in the same boat with me. Logically, I know such folks are out there, but that’s different from seeing them actually tell their story.

I know plenty of older widows who have had great single lives traveling, caring for pets, fixing up houses, dealing with properties etc. Logically I know I can do all that. It’s just a big adjustment without my “cheering section” of mom and husband, both of whom have gone to be with the Lord.

I will pray for all on this thread and thank you for your suggestions and for sharing your challenges with me.
 
Last edited:
I have had my fair share of experiences prior to my conversion and during my time as a Catholic as well.

Right before I converted, I got diagnosed with first episode psychosis and depression which then eventually developed to its final form as schizo-affective disorder. I was in and out of the hospital at least every 6 months for either attempting to take my life or just losing touch with reality all together. It is only recently that Padre Pio’s words are fully practiced in my life through the grace of God. Day in and Day out I would be in the snares of anxiety, but now that God has so graciously let me overcome those trials. It has been over a year since I’ve had any negative symptom of any mental illness. As I have said I’ve been in and out of the hospital at least every 6 months (while having anxiety everyday) for 6 years. Little did I realize (now I do with the grace of divine truth) that throughout this time of struggle and hardship that the Lord was quietly working in my soul and purging me of all earthly attachments and purifying me in the fire of love.

To now get to the point in assistance for you, is that the Lord is pleased with your desire and that you open your heart to Him. These struggles and worries that you are going through are to build a strong foundation of humility and patience to have utter and extreme awe in the Lord and His greatness. To attempt to speed up the process of gaining union with the Lord and to be freed from these pains is to pray for humility and complete detachment to all the things that worry you.

Without even knowing what you worry about it, it always boils down to the same thing. It is borne out of an attachment to family, friends, and material things and this is not the love that God is, but a possessive love. As long you are of the world, then you are with worldly things and that causes anxiety and fear, but if you are of the Lord then you are with Godly and Divine things and that can only cause joy and happiness because that is what God is.

I know through contemplation and constant prayer that God will guide you to freedom from the world and that you will always continue to pray for humility and self-knowledge. I will also pray for your success in finding the Lord and become free from your worries and anxieties.
 
Tis_Bearself said:
Anybody got suggestions, or something specific they themselves do, for building trust in the Lord and worrying less, especially when faced with big challenges in life?
Click to expand...
What I try to do is take a walk in nature far from people if I can. Then I just sit and ponder that God really does have everything in control in nature. If he can do it in nature, he can do it in your life. Free will in human beings is really overrated. Sometimes I don’t want to do it all and make all the decisions by myself thinking that my free will knows best (it doesn’t).

So I am also saying the Surrender Novena. Has it helped with worry? I don’t know but when I feel the anxious thoughts of “you better do something in your life, get going, make a decision, life is passing you by, winter is coming, etc, etc.” I just say “O Jesus I surrender to you, you take care of it!” Then the thought goes away for at least a minute. 🙂 Of course my life is still the same and I don’t know where I am going or what I am doing but if Jesus has it in hand, great, I leave it to him.

Surrendering is hard, lonely, and requires so much faith and belief when all you see is the opposite.
 
I’ve been pondering the same thing.

My blythe and pat answer is “do everything in your own power, release it back to the Lord, and wait…”

Problem is, how do I know I did “everything in my power?”

Aghh!

All I can offer is prayer, but I’ll be watching this thread with interest…

:pray:t2::pray:t2::pray:t2:❤️❤️❤️
 
Breaking free from worrying is a process. Don’t get discouraged if you slip up, get up quickly and keep going. Take one day at a time. Remember this: ‘And who of you by being worried can add a single hour to his life?’ - Matt 6:27
 
Dan_Defender said:
Remember this: ‘And who of you by being worried can add a single hour to his life?’ - Matt 6:27
Click to expand...
This is exactly it. If worrying motivates you to take a positive step, such as you’re worried about your health so you change your eating habits and start exercising more, then that’s fine. But if you’re already doing all you can and you worry anyway about stuff you can’t control, it’s pointless. It’s not going to help or change anything. I wish I had a Mr. Spock logical self to just come out at times like that.
 
Thistle - recommended a book - that I actually have -
One of the pages has some cool advice that I wrote down…
I have the paper taped on my stairway railing 😇

“ Live in the world
As if you lived there all
by yourself with God

Don’t look forward to anything

Don’t get involved with all its comings and goings

Don’t have great expectations

Just do - what your supposed to do

And say your prayers “
 
Last edited:
I have anxiety so I am pretty much always worrying.
I find a keeping a prayer journal helpful. Looking back, every time I worry and do not trust God, God makes it work out in the end. He gets me through it. But it seems like everytime a new challenge comes up, my worry makes me forget all He has done, so it really helps to read through old entries and remember all the ways God has worked in my life. Maybe, one day, I will really get it, and break free from my worry, but for now, I will just offer it all up to Him.
 
Hello.

There’s a book called the Worrier’s Guide to the Bible or something … I need to look it up. There’s also the parable of the sparrow’s feathers being counted and Jesus telling us how much we mean to Him and to not worry.

There’s the phrase “Do not let your hearts be troubled.”

Also, I recently read something about custody of the imagination, or custody of the mind – it’s sort of like custody of the eyes. One averts the eyes from what may bother the soul, and in the same way we should avert our thoughts from those that cause useless worry. It’s a process and takes practice - I have a long way to go.

When I was traveling across the country by myself one time and on this terrifyingly busy highway, I remember grasping the steering wheel and repeating “Let go and let God.” I got through that.

Also, it helps me to remember the times when I was taken care of. I once lost a signed check with no amount filled in and I was so overwhelmed with that and other things that I just went to bed. Later a neighbor came over with the check. She’d found it blowing around in the grass.

Also, the Footprints Prayer. I know it’s all over the place, but it does help with worry and distrust in God. Also, during confession, confessing distrust in God helps. God will give us the grace to help with that.

That’s all I got for now. You are in my prayers. Please pray for me.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top