I know this thread is a few months old but I have an update. So in November, the guy I mentioned, along with his mom and my parents all went to a concert. He was acting weird at the concert and I later found out he had been drinking. I later approached him asking when we were going to go out and he said “we are out now” but I then said I meant us alone. He then got weird and said he has too many issues to deal with now, such as his drinking problem, his mom being sick (she is 80) and dealing with business issues (he owns a business with his mom). He said right now is not a good time. I left it at that. However he talks about getting together but I assume he means in a platonic way. A few weeks later he invited all of us to his mom’s surprise 80th birthday party and when I came in he smiled and was telling me he wanted to introduce me to his family. His mom also told me she wanted to go to a ballet with me because she likes it and most people she knows do not. However, he has been drinking more and more. I’ve come to the conclusion he likes me, but just as a friend. He likes my parents too and always hugs them and tells them he is so happy we all came into his life. I am heartbroken he isn’t ready now (or ever) but not surprised since I can never find men who like me that I like. I do get that he doesn’t want any relationship for now because he wants to deal with his drinking. Is this forever or just now? no idea.
In January though at church I had some guy come up to me and offer to buy me incense. I said no and he looked disappointed. I have been seeing this guy when I attend church but I think he’s being friendly. Even if he’s interested (which I doubt)I’m not interested in him because he’s not my type. I don’t know anything about him, he could be married, or divorced with kids or something else. I am going to ask about him since it is a question wondering if he’s interested or just being friendly.
Anyway, I’ve given up on dating and am done looking. I tried online and all that seemed interested were perverts, men with kids and exes, much older men and young 20 something guys looking for cougars. The never married, Catholic childless men my age were all seeking younger. I’ve accepted that my destiny might to be alone and I accept it. However it breaks my heart to think this. When I get invited to weddings of much younger people (this happens a lot lately)I end up depressed for hours and cry. I don’t attend weddings anymore because of it and can’t handle talk about marriages without crying. A few months ago at my book club one woman was discussing her daughter’s wedding (her daughter of course being younger)and I burst into tears and left the room. I will admit this does test my faith wondering why God is hurting me, until I realize he must realize I’m not marriage material. That’s when I try to be strong knowing there are worse things than never marrying.