NFP - How many safe days to you have ?

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I am writing and giving a HUGE complaint because of this thread!! Go find a small whole and bleed there!!!
 
Mommamaree:

Thank you for the advice!

It actually sounds like nfp may not be too bad!! I thought that 85% of the time i would have been dying of frustration…and that the 15% would have all came at once.

But if it’s every other day or…or even every 3-4 days then i stand a chance! Praise the Lord!!!

Yes, believe me, i’ll be taking every snippet of information in and learning it off by heart haha!! Firstly because i nfp honours God, secondly because it will respect my future wife’s body and thirdly because it will give me something to look forward too (like a child and an advent callendar haha).
  • can ya half tell this single life is killing me?? Please God, send me a wife asap!!!
Thanks once again.

(it’s a bit awkward for a guy asking questions about this sort of thing - but i’m directly affected too!)
 
I habe had ENOUGH nonsense with this lame site - I am leaving for ever!! FO!
 
agapewolf said:
There is nothing “nonsense” or “garbage” about learning how NFP works.
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I t doesn’t matter - I wrote the the site and am leaving because of this ONE thread. Thanks for contributing to the nonsense!!
 
Slowride said:
I habe had ENOUGH nonsense with this lame site - I am leaving for ever!! FO!
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🤷

Good thing Slowride didn’t stumble across any number of threads about masturbation, which acts of foreplay are licit, etc. He/she might have had a stroke reading those!
 
Slowride said:
I t doesn’t matter - I wrote the the site and am leaving because of this ONE thread. Thanks for contributing to the nonsense!!
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What’s wrong with asking how many ‘safe days’ a woman has to have sex? Seriously? This is Catholic Answers. Where you get Catholic answers. From Catholics.
 
Back to the question: How many safe days to you have?

Based on the number of children we have vs the number we specifically planned, it seems fewer safe days than we thought.
 
@SlowRide, if anything you’re contributing to the ‘nonsense’ by de-railing this thread.
 
Robert789 said:
Mommamaree:

Thank you for the advice!

It actually sounds like nfp may not be too bad!! I thought that 85% of the time i would have been dying of frustration…and that the 15% would have all came at once.

But if it’s every other day or…or even every 3-4 days then i stand a chance! Praise the Lord!!!

Yes, believe me, i’ll be taking every snippet of information in and learning it off by heart haha!! Firstly because i nfp honours God, secondly because it will respect my future wife’s body and thirdly because it will give me something to look forward too (like a child and an advent callendar haha).
  • can ya half tell this single life is killing me?? Please God, send me a wife asap!!!
Thanks once again.

(it’s a bit awkward for a guy asking questions about this sort of thing - but i’m directly affected too!)
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It’s not really every few days when you’re trying to avoid. It’s more like… Several days of menstruation (people’s comfort with intimacy during menstrual flow varies), then maybe 1-3 “safe” days, then a period of abstinence that is usually 8-13 days, depending on the woman, then around a week to ten days of “safe” days, then menstruation starts the cycle again.

I have a typical cycle and mine might look like…
1-5 usually abstain due to menstruation, optional
6-14 abstain
18-27 safe days
Start over
 
Slowride said:
I am writing and giving a HUGE complaint because of this thread!! Go find a small whole and bleed there!!!
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Wow… just wow… they are just talking about NFP. No big deal.

Find a whole (sic) and bleed? Really? :rolleyes::eek:
 
Jackiemom:

8-13 days??? Oh my goodness!!

Don’t get me wrong, i fully understand that it’s not the woman’s fault.

Err…ok, i have no idea how much a woman bleeds etc…but i think out of respect, that thats more “no go time”. I suppose for me, it’s all about pleasuring the woman that means the world to be…so i shouldnt be taking my own needs into consideration.

Oh God, please give me a wife that is considerate to my needs. I just hope that if she sees that i am struggling or suffering, that she may consider those 'less pleasent times."

Help me Lord to accept my future wife’s body and treat it with pure respect and love no matter what.

Haha - currently i cant go 3 days without ‘doing it myself’. This highlights the need for me to clean my act up so i can survive nfp when i get married.

Thanks for your help…and for not being offended by my silly questions.

I really do mean the most respect 🙂
 
Sorry, just another few questions that have popped into my head!
  1. what is women’s views on sex during menstruation? Would it be seen as disrespectful for a husband to ask his wife for sex during this period (no pun intended :p)
  2. when is it best to learn about nfp? I presume before marriage so you both can get rocking asap? Yet how can a man get practise charting his future wife’s temps etc if there arent living together yet? …and tbh i wudnt want to get too involved with anything sexual till i was married (i’m too easily tempted and excited to guarantee that i’d be in control of my body 😦 )
 
Robert789 said:
Sorry, just another few questions that have popped into my head!
  1. what is women’s views on sex during menstruation? Would it be seen as disrespectful for a husband to ask his wife for sex during this period (no pun intended :p)
  2. when is it best to learn about nfp? I presume before marriage so you both can get rocking asap? Yet how can a man get practise charting his future wife’s temps etc if there arent living together yet? …and tbh i wudnt want to get too involved with anything sexual till i was married (i’m too easily tempted and excited to guarantee that i’d be in control of my body 😦 )
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Number 1: no it is not at all disrespectful. Once you are married, invite her to try it and see if it is mutually enjoyable. Some couples like it and some don’t.

Number 2: during PreCana, you will likely be required to take an NFP course with your fiancée. Just pay attention then, and do your reading and homework. Don’t worry about charting for your bride until after the wedding. She can learn charting prior to the wedding and then you can share that information once you are married.

You have a good attitude about all of this. And you are committed to working to develop the virtue of chastity. Those two things will serve you well in your marriage someday. God bless you! 😉
 
Robert789 said:
Sorry, just another few questions that have popped into my head!
  1. what is women’s views on sex during menstruation? Would it be seen as disrespectful for a husband to ask his wife for sex during this period (no pun intended :p)
  2. when is it best to learn about nfp? I presume before marriage so you both can get rocking asap? Yet how can a man get practise charting his future wife’s temps etc if there arent living together yet? …and tbh i wudnt want to get too involved with anything sexual till i was married (i’m too easily tempted and excited to guarantee that i’d be in control of my body 😦 )
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Can I just point out that when we marry we are called to be open to children - not to avoid conception. NFP is one option (with abstinence) for couples who believe they have a serious or grave reason to avoid pregnancy - it is not supposed to be the default option.

If you don’t want children then arguably you are not ready to marry.

As for a husband charting for his future wife. Whilst it may be good for him to learn about NFP for the future I for one would say that the details needed to chart (BT some methods especially) are too intimate to be shared before marriage.
 
Awk thanks once again 🙂 youre so good 🙂

Haha, i think to be honest i’m not a fan of blood myself. But i suppose i couldnt complain about the mess, seeing as i’d be the one who was making my own mess EVERY time :L If she’s accepting what i’m producing, then i know i’ve got to accept what she is too.

I dunno, i thought that it would have been disrespectful because i expected it to be painful for her.

There’s only one drawback from nfp in my book. I believe that it is a man’s DUTY to ensure his wife recieves pleasure. Ok, lets be honest, the chances are that the husband will finish first, and he must finish within his wife’s body 🙂 If i’m not mistaken, the catholic church allows me to finally pleasure her manually or orally. But seeing as i’ve just gooed up down there (eugh!). You would not have that problem with some other methods. Still, if God wants us to use nfp then it’s good enough for me…and i’d just battle on if thats what it takes to see my woman’s smile gleaming back at me 😉

Haha, yes, i do want to live a chaste life…and an extremely fulfilling one at that! But where i’ll EVER find a girl that wants to do that too, i have NO idea. God’s really gonna have to pull something out of the hat for me!!

Thanks once again. May God bless you, your hubby and your family 🙂
 
Susanne T:

Yes, i completely agree with all you’ve said!

I’ll admit, i think there is a underlying theme of selfishness on my part here. I have to completely learn to forget about myself and only be concerned about the other half.

And yes, sex is all about being open to God gifting you with children.

I’ve some work to do in my own heart before i get married…and i thank you for highlighting where i can improve myself…because sometimes you hide your bad bits and pretend to yourself that all’s ok.

Currently, i think my heart is looking for my own pleasure, but i need to get rid of that and think only of God and a woman first.
  • it’s just difficult to do when i dont have a girl to focus on…yet my own hormones are very much alive and kicking - CONSTANTLY!
Somehow i need to sort out my heart first, then maybe God will (finally) send a wee gem in my direction 🙂

Thanks once again
 
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