No Idea What I'm Called to

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If I remember right from the old forum, you were home schooled correct?
 
Indeed I was. I went to public school in kindergarten and first grade, but I was a big troublemaker and I got sent to the principal’s office regularly. As a result, my parents decided to homeschool me. This helped me stop being a troublemaker, but I feel may have caused some issues when I was younger from isolation as my mother rarely left tho house. I believe I was an extrovert in kindergarten and first grade, but between my starting to attend Mass in 2014 and the end of me going to homeschool groups around 2008 or so I became afraid of talking to strangers. This is definitely not the case anymore though as I have returned to who I really am: an extrovert.

During my period of isolation I really only interacted with people online, which I feel was very detrimental. This lead me to viewing immoral content around age 12 and becoming an internet and gaming addict.

Homeschooling did help me though as I feel it lead me to discover my interests: history, music, graphic design, and many other hobbies.

Late edit: this is really probably where my fear of my mother comes from and her overly protective attitude arised.
 
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Do you not see where a professional might help you sort this all out? Going from social troublemaker to isolated to afraid to talk to extrovert is a huge psychological journey. It’s not your fault…perhaps not even your parents if they believed that it was the right thing…but really, mentally, you’ve been through the wringer.
 
One major point I forgot to mention is this: starting around 2007 I was part of a historical house museum’s youth program until about 2012-2013 or so. This might seem mundane, but I think it’s probably not. For years I was the only boy in the program. I was surrounded by girls who had reached puberty already and were rather immature. I was annoyed by them and I don’t think I really ever talked to them except one who I became friends with when I first started. I called her my “girlfriend” but I didn’t know what that really meant as I hadn’t reached puberty yet and wasn’t attracted to the fairer sex yet. We were really just friends. I feel that this, and being with a bunch of giggly, immature girls made me uncomfortable talking to females for ages.

Perhaps this is why I’ve never dated yet. I don’t know. 🤔
 
Are there any opportunities in the near future for you to live in a different area or even go abroad? Several of my friends spent a year or so abroad after finishing their undergraduate degrees. It can really broaden your horizons and get you meeting different people.

For some people living with parents as an adult can be a real block on growing as an adult even when the parents aren’t being deliberately obstructive (most probably aren’t).
 
Not many people your age know what path they want to take for the rest of thier lives. It is a time of self discovery. I think you need to experience life a bit more.

Many young men get a bit unnerved around women, and the same holds true for women.

And lastly, many college degrees can be useful to many career paths. You will need computer knowledge in all of them.

Continue to pray to the Holy Spirit for direction and don’t be anxious about this.☺️
 
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I see what you mean. What I was getting at though was that he wasn’t baptized in some other denomination.
 
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Melodeonist, someone once said that many are the strange chances of the world, and helps oft shall come from the hands of the weak when the wise falter.

Don’t worry too much; you’ll find your way.
 
Gosh you sound like you have a lot on your mind. Firstly relax…you are young you have time. There is no hurry. The process of finding out God’s call is slow and gentle… like a breeze blowing. It is not going to be one minute you don’t know the next you do. It’ll be subtle suggestions …most likely.
I don’t know what country you are in but I am a retired Police officer from the UK if you want any inside info on what the career is really like. Oh I’m retired due to ill health so I am not old an you won’t hear lot’s of… in my day …etc. 😃 I retired in Dec 2013. But that’s not too relevant if you are in US. I haven’t read every word above so sorry if you say, I am not good with scrolling 😉

Did you know that it’s very common for people being called to priesthood to experience a feeling like a call to marriage as well? the two are closer than you think, they are both fathers, the feeling is very similar.
I saw you didn’t manage to get a spiritual director. Have you tried getting a book on discerning a vocation? in the meantime. I got one from CTS (Catholic truth society) and found it immensely helpful for me (of course my option were much more limited than yours) . If you go through the steps in that or another book and contact your diocese vocations director for information. You can receive guidance without any commitment to a specific direction. Also praying is immensely helpful, the rosary and adoration especially. Work really hard on improving your spiritual life and believe me the rest will fall into place in God’s own time.

As for dating, don’t push it, let God lead you if it’s meant to be… He will show you how, where, when and who. It would be better to start out making friends and see where things go from there.
 
I discerned religious life for at least 4 years before meeting my husband 2 years ago. I had never dated and I was sometimes convinced I was going to be a nun. My advice is to live life and don’t over think it. In each moment take the next best step which leads you closer to God. Don’t be afraid to date as it may reveal your true vocation one way or another. Walk closely with God and listen for his voice. He will lead you! Be not afraid! Life turns out exactly as He plans if we live our lives closely connected to God’s commandments and the church’s teachings. Anxiety is the devil’s trap. Be at peace always, trusting in God’s goodness. God bless you!
 
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I’m in the same boat. No dating prospects and I’m not gonna go wildly dating using Tinder. So here I sit amidst the shattered ruins of my existence. ALONE. ALONE!!!
 
Trying to sort out a religious life on an internet forum isn’t the best option, you are going to get 1000s of different views, your best bet is to stop seeking guidance online, talk to your parents, stay invloved in your parish, talk to your bishop or priest, find a spiritual director, and live your life with out stressing out over what to do.

If you find yourself being to wishy washy and stressing out over and needing (name removed by moderator)ut constantly, that is no good, if you have good anxiety over a choice, then you are moving in the right direction.

{ Disclaimer, read my previous disclaimers }
 
Got a spiritual director now. He’s a guy from the Diocese at the Newman Club. Only really did spiritual direction once as of this post since we started SD on Saturday.

He said something along the lines about perhaps looking into the priesthood or being a deacon. Of course, this was our first SD session so things may change. I didn’t really mention how I struggle with a high libido.
 
Is he a priest? A seminarian? Did you ask him to be your SD or did you just have a talk.
I’m wondering what SD talks vocation to the religious life at that first meeting.
But hey, if it gets you talking and saying what you have already told millions here…that’s a very good thing.
 
I don’t know what he does for the Diocese exactly, but I think he’s the Lay Minister for the college.

I asked about SD in one of the meetings and he offered to be my SD. I asked him to be my SD on Saturday at a Prayer Hike event which unfortunately only me and him could attend.
 
Yes, it was indeed a fortunately. If some of the others were there I don’t think I would have been comfortable asking/telling him some stuff. 😳
 
My dear friend,
  1. TALK to your Pastor ASAP
2 End EVERY Prayer with THY WILL BE DONE IN MY LIFE LORD
  1. Pray through Mary VERY much
May God guide your path

Patrick
 
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