Non-catholic at mass, when should I leave?

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Hello,

I am not Catholic, so when I go to mass is it best to duck out right before everyone goes to the front for communion? Or should I stay until the end? Which is proper? I thought I remember hearing “catechumens depart” or something along those lines one week, but I didn’t last week. So, I wasn’t sure what to do.

Thanks!
 
cloudcar said:
Hello,

I am not Catholic, so when I go to mass is it best to duck out right before everyone goes to the front for communion? Or should I stay until the end? Which is proper? I thought I remember hearing “catechumens depart” or something along those lines one week, but I didn’t last week. So, I wasn’t sure what to do.

Thanks!
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That depends. Are you a catechumen or not? If you are a catechumen, you should leave when they dismiss you and go to class - hopefully the catechist in RCIA class discussed this with you all.

If you are not a catechumen, stay until the end of mass, just don’t go up for communion.

Good luck, and God bless!
 
Stay until the end of the closing song. Don’t worry about staying seated durning communion. It is common and a lot of people do it for many reasons. You won’t be the only one and you won’t get weird looks.

Please stay until the end of the closing hymn. I dislike the mad dash that lots of people make to the door during the song.
 
You can stay to the end if you like, just remain seated during communion. As to “catechumens depart,” were you at an Eastern Catholic or Eastern Orthodox liturgy? Most of them, as I understand it, retain this line. If you were at a Roman Catholic Mass, they might dismiss catechumens in a group for their class, but I’d be surprised if they used the phrase, “Catechumens depart!”
 
the_hazel_nut said:
That depends. Are you a catechumen or not? If you are a catechumen, you should leave when they dismiss you and go to class - hopefully the catechist in RCIA class discussed this with you all.

If you are not a catechumen, stay until the end of mass, just don’t go up for communion.

Good luck, and God bless!
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He can go up for a blessing right?
 
VetA said:
He can go up for a blessing right?
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Some say yes and others no.

Only the priest can give a blessing so going to a EM or Deacon accomplishes nothing.
I would recommend that he/she remain seated or standing in the pew and not go up.

Peace
James
 
I’m not all the way across the Tiber yet and I stay until the end.

What I find somewhat bothersome is when I notice people ducking out right after receiving the Eucharist.

I know, I know… I shouldn’t “judge” others. They may have some place really important they must get to and may have been taking a chance on being late by staying that long. Give them the benefit of the doubt.

note to self - add this to confession list :o
 
Poco said:
I’m not all the way across the Tiber yet and I stay until the end.

What I find somewhat bothersome is when I notice people ducking out right after receiving the Eucharist.

I know, I know… I shouldn’t “judge” others. They may have some place really important they must get to and may have been taking a chance on being late by staying that long. Give them the benefit of the doubt.

note to self - add this to confession list :o
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Growing up, there was a parish across the street form my house. I always marveled at the “Catholic Grand Prix” which occurred like clockwork at the end of mass. I hear this was where Mario Andretti learned to drive…

Seriously, correction is not judgment. You are being called to set a good example for those Catholics who seem to have better things to do than be reverent and fellowship with brothers and sisters after mass.
 
kmuestwin said:
Stay until the end of the closing song. Don’t worry about staying seated durning communion. It is common and a lot of people do it for many reasons. You won’t be the only one and you won’t get weird looks.

Please stay until the end of the closing hymn. I dislike the mad dash that lots of people make to the door during the song.
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I from time to time get some very dirty looks when I don’t go up for communion, but not very often.
 
Stick around to the end and one up these guys by staying for prayer as well, very few of us do that and too often people dine and dash, just pitiful guys…
 
Thank you!
po18guy said:
Seriously, correction is not judgment. You are being called to set a good example for those Catholics who seem to have better things to do than be reverent and fellowship with brothers and sisters after mass.
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At the risk of going a bit off topic here…

For what seemed like many weeks when I first started attending this parish, there was always something going on in the parish hall after Mass. So, no coffee and donuts. I was like, “What’s up with this?! Not only can I not receive the Eucharist yet, I can’t even get a cup of coffee after Mass?” 🤷

Now I just look at it as maybe some kind of test to see how serious I was! 😃
 
Poco said:
Thank you!

At the risk of going a bit off topic here…

For what seemed like many weeks when I first started attending this parish, there was always something going on in the parish hall after Mass. So, no coffee and donuts. I was like, “What’s up with this?! Not only can I not receive the Eucharist yet, I can’t even get a cup of coffee after Mass?” 🤷

Now I just look at it as maybe some kind of test to see how serious I was! 😃
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I still find it difficult even when there is coffee afterwards, still don’t fit in so don’t bother wasting my time to mingle. We have a lot to learn from our Protestant brethren in this regard, they do with us in a different context though, what a concept if we could take the best of both and combine the two. Reverent, full mass and service combined with genuine fellowship afterwards and perhaps some better music in the process.
 
prodigalson12 said:
I still find it difficult even when there is coffee afterwards, still don’t fit in so don’t bother wasting my time to mingle. We have a lot to learn from our Protestant brethren in this regard, they do with us in a different context though, what a concept if we could take the best of both and combine the two. Reverent, full mass and service combined with genuine fellowship afterwards and perhaps some better music in the process.
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This is one of the reasons I am so glad for converts. They can help us tremendously. 👍

Peace
James
 
prodigalson12 said:
Stick around to the end and one up these guys by staying for prayer as well, very few of us do that and too often people dine and dash, just pitiful guys…
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I too asm saddened by the few who remain after mass. Personally I just don’t see the point in dashing out just to sit in traffic in the parking lot. What is the point in hat. 🤷

On another note and a defence in a sense.
Catholic Churches generally have several masses scheduled on Sunday morning. At our Parish there are three scheduled 2 hours apart but I know there are others with more, and scheduled more tightly. This can make things difficult to, “mingle” and “fellowship” for very long as the parking lot needs cleared for the next mass.

I’m not saying that we shouldn’t do more, on the contrary, but there are factors in some parishes that can complicate things.

Peace
James
 
Lutheranteach said:
I from time to time get some very dirty looks when I don’t go up for communion, but not very often.
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I’ve never noticed any “dirty” looks when I don’t go up. Just some quizzical looks and some irritated looks as people have to walk past me , though.
 
Poco said:
I’m not all the way across the Tiber yet and I stay until the end.

What I find somewhat bothersome is when I notice people ducking out right after receiving the Eucharist.

I know, I know… I shouldn’t “judge” others. They may have some place really important they must get to and may have been taking a chance on being late by staying that long. Give them the benefit of the doubt.

note to self - add this to confession list :o
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I, too, feel disturbed when I am aware of the same people ducking out right after the Eucharist.

I can’t “judge” them as the Lord only knows how ignorant they may be as to giving thanksgiving and remaining with the Lord after receiving him, or if they have a charitable appointment to keep.

It would be helpful if the priest would tactfully address that at an opportune time. (after the homily?).

We can all use correction (which is Scriptural) in some way or another.
 
Vet A,

NO, OP cannot enter the Communion line and go up for a blessing. This topic has been discussed extensively on this forum in several threads.😦 But, he/she should stay until the end of the final hymn.

Everyone receives a blessing at the end of the Mass. Please do not enter the Communion line with crossed arms for a blessing.

:amen:
 
I’ve attended Mass twice and stayed until the end of the last song without any problem. I thought it was polite to.

I just stayed sitting during Communion (the second time I think I knelled because others were), and let people out if need be. I would have felt rude leaving before everyone else did–I guess that’s English reserve ;)–though I noticed others did or arrived late.
 
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