Not sure if I mortally sinned

[Mirathiel]

Hey,
I felt like I may have committed a sin of calumny. I insulted a person’s intelligence (I suppose in retaliation to a past hurt this person did to me) while talking to my coworker who did not know this person. I did not name the person, but I knew in my heart it was not the right thing to do and did it anyway. Should I try to get to confession ASAP?
Thanks

 

[po18guy]

Of course, you should go to confession! From the catechism:

2477 Respect for the reputation of persons forbids every attitude and word likely to cause them unjust injury.278 He becomes guilty:

• of rash judgment who, even tacitly, assumes as true, without sufficient foundation, the moral fault of a neighbor;
• of detraction who, without objectively valid reason, discloses another’s faults and failings to persons who did not know them;279
• of calumny who, by remarks contrary to the truth, harms the reputation of others and gives occasion for false judgments concerning them.

 

[michaelmas]

Hey,
I felt like I may have committed a sin of calumny. I insulted a person’s intelligence (I suppose in retaliation to a past hurt this person did to me) while talking to my coworker who did not know this person. I did not name the person, but I knew in my heart it was not the right thing to do and did it anyway. Should I try to get to confession ASAP?
Thanks

It isn’t easy to commit a mortal sin. A lot of thought, planning, and consideration needs to go into it. I am sure you didn’t sit down and think this out and plan on how you were going to say it?

You should still go to confession to get the grace and advice on how to deal with this in the future but in my opinion you did not mortally sin. Take a look at the catechism on mortal sin.

 

[Bookcat]

It isn’t easy to commit a mortal sin. A lot of thought, planning, and consideration needs to go into it.

I would not put it quite like that. One need not have “alot of thought, planning…”.

One needs grave matter, full knowledge and compete consent. Yes.

 

[Bookcat]

Compendium issued by Pope Benedict XVI

1. When does one commit a mortal sin?

1855-1861
1874

One commits a mortal sin when there are simultaneously present: grave matter, full knowledge, and deliberate consent. This sin destroys charity in us, deprives us of sanctifying grace, and, if unrepented, leads us to the eternal death of hell. It can be forgiven in the ordinary way by means of the sacraments of Baptism and of Penance or Reconciliation.

1. When does one commit a venial sin?

1862-1864
1875

One commits a venial sin, which is essentially different from a mortal sin, when the matter involved is less serious or, even if it is grave, when full knowledge or complete consent are absent. Venial sin does not break the covenant with God but it weakens charity and manifests a disordered affection for created goods. It impedes the progress of a soul in the exercise of the virtues and in the

vatican.va/archive/compendium_ccc/documents/archive_2005_compendium-ccc_en.html practice of moral good. It merits temporal punishment which purifies.

 

[SteveGC]

Hey,
I felt like I may have committed a sin of calumny. I insulted a person’s intelligence (I suppose in retaliation to a past hurt this person did to me) while talking to my coworker who did not know this person. I did not name the person, but I knew in my heart it was not the right thing to do and did it anyway. Should I try to get to confession ASAP?
Thanks

Hard to say. When in doubt, confess it for sure.

If you spoke a truth about the person, then it’s not necessarily calumny, but rather detraction. But detraction usually involves disclosing the person’s identity, which you said you did not do. Perhaps you did rashly judge the person, however.

Of course, much of all that is largely semantics, but at first glance it seems to me to be a venial sin. Yet, if your conscience is summoning your attention to this action in this way, it is indeed wise to reconcile sacramentally.

 

[Mirathiel]

Yes, but I also tend to be scrupulous. I’m afraid of going back into a scrupulousity where I was going to confession every single week just out of fear. I feel like I’m just wasting the father’s time then.

 

[Bookcat]

Yes, but I also tend to be scrupulous. I’m afraid of going back into a scrupulousity where I was going to confession every single week just out of fear. I feel like I’m just wasting the father’s time then.

You then need to have a “regular confessor” and to ask him to direct you and give you perhaps some principles to follow.

 

[kozlosap]

Yes, but I also tend to be scrupulous. I’m afraid of going back into a scrupulousity where I was going to confession every single week just out of fear. I feel like I’m just wasting the father’s time then.

I think it sounds like you may be slipping a little backwards towards being overly scrupulous. As long as you are speaking with your spiritual adviser on a regular basis and not killing, maiming or kidnapping, I think you are just fine!

 

[friendlymomma]

This is very interesting to me. I am a Protestant who is seriously studying Catholicism and planning to join the Church. There is so much I love about the Church, but these worries about mortal sins really make me question the Catholic faith. I pray that I do not offend the poster when I question this, but do Catholics really believe they might go to hell if they say something bad to someone behind someone’s back? As a Protestant, I would have never even worried about that for one second. Everything is covered by the blood of Jesus. I have three little boys and it would just kill me if they spent their lives obsessing about venial and mortal sins. How do Catholics deal with this? I notice on this forum that there is even a “Scrupulosity Group,” so I see that this can be a big problem for Catholics.
I would really like to be at peace about this before I make my final plunge.

 

[Mirathiel]

This is very interesting to me. I am a Protestant who is seriously studying Catholicism and planning to join the Church. There is so much I love about the Church, but these worries about mortal sins really make me question the Catholic faith. I pray that I do not offend the poster when I question this, but do Catholics really believe they might go to hell if they say something bad to someone behind someone’s back? As a Protestant, I would have never even worried about that for one second. Everything is covered by the blood of Jesus. I have three little boys and it would just kill me if they spent their lives obsessing about venial and mortal sins. How do Catholics deal with this? I notice on this forum that there is even a “Scrupulosity Group,” so I see that this can be a big problem for Catholics.
I would really like to be at peace about this before I make my final plunge.

I would like to clarify. I never posted this to try to put the Catholic Church in a bad light. I have been diagnosed with generalized anxiety disorder which means I have abnormal anxiety about pretty much everything which includes religion. Please don’t think that is a typical Catholic problem. It is an issue for some people, but we are true believers in the mercy and love of God. I posted this to ask a question, and now to ask for prayers for my anxiety. May God bless you in your journey.

 

[Bookcat]

This is very interesting to me. I am a Protestant who is seriously studying Catholicism and planning to join the Church. There is so much I love about the Church, but these worries about mortal sins really make me question the Catholic faith. I pray that I do not offend the poster when I question this, but do Catholics really believe they might go to hell if they say something bad to someone behind someone’s back? As a Protestant, I would have never even worried about that for one second. Everything is covered by the blood of Jesus. I have three little boys and it would just kill me if they spent their lives obsessing about venial and mortal sins. How do Catholics deal with this? I notice on this forum that there is even a “Scrupulosity Group,” so I see that this can be a big problem for Catholics.
I would really like to be at peace about this before I make my final plunge.

Scrupulosity effects persons from all kinds of backgrounds. Not just Catholics. One ought not confuse those who struggle with such with “the Catholic Faith”…or that it is something that is “Catholic”. It can take many forms in fact. I have had the occasions to give advice to some who have so struggled and even within those who are Catholic it can take various forms.

Here is the basics of what the Church teaches about Mortal sin from the Compendium issued by Pope Benedict XVI:

1. When does one commit a mortal sin?

1855-1861
1874

One commits a mortal sin when there are simultaneously present: grave matter, full knowledge, and deliberate consent. This sin destroys charity in us, deprives us of sanctifying grace, and, if unrepented, leads us to the eternal death of hell. It can be forgiven in the ordinary way by means of the sacraments of Baptism and of Penance or Reconciliation.

1. When does one commit a venial sin?

1862-1864
1875

One commits a venial sin, which is essentially different from a mortal sin, when the matter involved is less serious or, even if it is grave, when full knowledge or complete consent are absent. Venial sin does not break the covenant with God but it weakens charity and manifests a disordered affection for created goods. It impedes the progress of a soul in the exercise of the virtues and in the practice of moral good. It merits temporal punishment which purifies.

vatican.va/archive/compendium_ccc/documents/archive_2005_compendium-ccc_en.html

The question of entering into full Communion with the Catholic Church is a separate question. I entered myself after discovering it is the Church that Jesus founded. That of the early Christians …etc

 

[friendlymomma]

I would like to clarify. I never posted this to try to put the Catholic Church in a bad light. I have been diagnosed with generalized anxiety disorder which means I have abnormal anxiety about pretty much everything which includes religion. Please don’t think that is a typical Catholic problem. It is an issue for some people, but we are true believers in the mercy and love of God. I posted this to ask a question, and now to ask for prayers for my anxiety. May God bless you in your journey.

God bless you. It is not your fault. I was already very concerned with this issue before I saw your post. I tried to start a new thread about it a couple days ago, but haven’t gotten any posts, so I thought I might get some answers here.
One of my sons is a highly anxious person and I am so concerned that this might be an issue for him.

 

[SteveGC]

God bless you. It is not your fault. I was already very concerned with this issue before I saw your post. I tried to start a new thread about it a couple days ago, but haven’t gotten any posts, so I thought I might get some answers here.
One of my sons is a highly anxious person and I am so concerned that this might be an issue for him.

Hi friendlymomma,

Did you delete the thread you tried to start? I would be happy to participate in such a thread if you restart it. Perhaps you need some help doing that? I noticed the only other place you’ve posted was the Meet & Greet thread.

 

[Mirathiel]

God bless you. It is not your fault. I was already very concerned with this issue before I saw your post. I tried to start a new thread about it a couple days ago, but haven’t gotten any posts, so I thought I might get some answers here.
One of my sons is a highly anxious person and I am so concerned that this might be an issue for him.

I will pray for your son. I certainly know how anxiety can take over, but I am getting into the habit of reading the Word everyday to build up hope to combat it. And I will go to a priest I know tomorrow and ask him to help me. Even without the distinction between mortal and venial sin, anxiety can detract from the beautiful gifts that God gives us to build his kingdom. I refuse to let that happen .
Also, as I was reading your post, I was talking to my friend on the phone (who is also Catholic) who is older and wiser than I am. She said your exact words that it was covered by the blood of Jesus as I read your words that that sin was covered by the blood of Jesus. Your post was a confirmation sent to me by God. Thank you.

 

[friendlymomma]

Hi friendlymomma,

Did you delete the thread you tried to start? I would be happy to participate in such a thread if you restart it. Perhaps you need some help doing that? I noticed the only other place you’ve posted was the Meet & Greet thread.

Thanks, Steve,
I will try again to start a new thread about venial and mortal sins.

 

[friendlymomma]

Thanks, Mirathiel,
I appreciate prayers for my son very much.
Sorry I have added to your anxiety.
I am glad that you know you are covered in His blood! That is a happy thought!
I pray that we will both understand more fully the nature of God’s covenant with us, and be at peace.

 

[shawnhd45]

For someone who suffers from a multiple array of mental disorders (specifically panic attacks) I can tell you that you should NEVER fret over sins, yes there is mortal and venial as the scriptures and tradition teach us…BUT people who suffer from mental illness are not always culpable for their sins. Yes, you should still pray without ceasing…BUT trust in Jesus, He knows your true intentions! [SIGN][/SIGN]

 

[underacloud]

God bless you. It is not your fault. I was already very concerned with this issue before I saw your post. I tried to start a new thread about it a couple days ago, but haven’t gotten any posts, so I thought I might get some answers here.
One of my sons is a highly anxious person and I am so concerned that this might be an issue for him.

As Bookcat has noted previously, scrupulosity is more a general mental health issue (OCD) than Catholic specific; it just happens to express in a unique way within the Catholic faith. I’d suggest a few things:

a) I’m not trying to imply anything in saying this, but please consider that one joins the Catholic faith because they beleive it to be the truth. In that regard, there are crosses we all must bear in following the truth. Following Christ and His one true Church is not always easy, but the fact that the faith comes with difficulties is not a good reason to avoid it…even if fear for your son’s welfare is admirable.

b) Confession is a wonderful sacrament and provides an avenue for the spiritual treatment of scrupulosity. A scrupulous Catholic meeting with a regular confessor (aka spiritual director) can find very practical help in dealing with this condition.

c) Sometimes people coming from other Christian demoninations into Catholicism can have a better understanding of some elements of the faith than craddle Catholics who get caught up in a legalistic approach. Mortal sin is a hard doctrine to properly understand…it is not intended to put the fear of God into us with regard to every sin we commit, but to remind us nonetheless that it is possible to reject God and choose to separate ourselves from His love. If we think of mortal sin in these terms (along with the more legalistic description provided in the catechism) we don’t think of God as a judge waiting to pounce on our wrongdoings, but as a loving parent or spouse (both of these analogies are well established in scripture) who longs to be in a relationship with us, but allows our free will to reject Him if that is our choice (we can only choose to love God if we have the free will to also choose the other).

 

[Bookcat]

As Bookcat has noted previously, scrupulosity is more a general mental health issue (OCD) than Catholic specific

Humm…Bookcat would note that Scruples per se does not = OCD

though one who struggles with Scruples can also have OCD.