Nuttiest Things Non-Catholics Have Said or Done Around You Because You're Catholic

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Me: (at the end of a conversation): God Bless! (in the sense of bye, take care)
Him : That won’t get me into Catholic Heaven will it? (A bit cynically)
Me: Catholic Heaven? Well I hope you GO to heaven. You’re a heck of a nice guy.
Him: I don’t BELIEVE in God.
Me: May you be WONDERFULLY Surprised!

He left smiling. Probably unconverted, but ya plant a seed.

My charity was better than my theology that day. And that man is dead now.

RIP (I hope). :sad_yes:
 
JoeMike said:
And vice-versa.

Surprised? It’s true: The Jews also have had funny ideas and stories about us Christians and our “practices.” Some still do, in fact.

Check out “Unorthodox: The Scandalous Rejection of My Hasidic Roots” by Deborah Feldman.
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Oh dear. It seems if any two groups distrust each other for long enough, it always ends up in the fear that the other group are after their babies. It’s like gypsies: there’s an old myth that gypsies snatch pretty children and raise them as gypsies, but the gypsies have an old fear that any gypsy child can/could be legally snatched and adopted.
 
Some Protestant say that the RCC is the Great Whore of Babylon.
I did not even know that there were great and small whores in Babylon. Moreover that Babylon was already erased from the face of the EArth.
But as some repeated the sentence I was puzzled but never had the patience to look for the meaning of the Whore.
I find the sentence to amazingly stupid that I do not dare go for the meaning lest it lose its stupid and funny meaning.
But I know that somehow, somewhere, in the Bible, and in Babylon, this Whore exists. How come to be applied to our XXI RCC is something I do not know.
 
HisIsTheCrown said:
Some Protestant say that the RCC is the Great Whore of Babylon.
I did not even know that there were great and small whores in Babylon. Moreover that Babylon was already erased from the face of the EArth.
But as some repeated the sentence I was puzzled but never had the patience to look for the meaning of the Whore.
I find the sentence to amazingly stupid that I do not dare go for the meaning lest it lose its stupid and funny meaning.
But I know that somehow, somewhere, in the Bible, and in Babylon, this Whore exists. How come to be applied to our XXI RCC is something I do not know.
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CAF has very good track on the subject. It is actually an allusion to the book of revelation.
catholic.com/tracts/the-whore-of-babylon
 
**Catholic Terminology Blooper:
**
Story goes a Catholic guy married a sweet, innocent - but naive unchurched girl.

Their love grew, the girl wanted to learn more and more about his faith - and because of this he became more devout. They went to Mass each Sunday.

Very grateful to God, he decided to give up something TOUGH for Lent. But didn’t tell his Catholic-lite partner.

After a couple weeks of no sex in bed, she gave him a little nudge.

He whispered “I can’t NOW honey. :blushing: Y’see, I’m Catholic … it’s LENT and …”

She: “You … can LEND* it?!” :eek:
(* BTW - not a power Catholics have ... even in Lent)
 
I’ve heard the term “Taliban Catholic” from some very rabid anti-Catholics as of late and it made me headwall. :banghead:
 
Acerunner said:
CAF has very good track on the subject. It is actually an allusion to the book of revelation.
catholic.com/tracts/the-whore-of-babylon
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Yeah, I knew that there should be a quote on that. Thanks for the info.
But to put it simply and without any prejudices, I find that only demented people would made such allusion. It is so mean, so insulting, so lunatic that only people who are in mental disease hospital would dream of making such an allusion.
Now, it seems that Protestant are not exactly demented people…
So, how come?
 
Ian Paisley is still the darling of Bob Jones University types.
Another is Stephen Scott-Pearson in England. He was still pushing the “Mystery Babylon” book years after the author reputiated it.
 
You kids better watch out Inland Security might come knocking on the door looking for the WMCs (weapons of mass Catholizication) & the microchips. It might lead them to the hoards of treasure in the secret vaults under the Vatican. You know, the ones that lead to the Maria Monk tunnels.
 
Darran said:
Where have you been man?
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Worshiping statues and drinking the blood of non-believers, of course! 😃

Good golly. Talk about lack of research.
BListon said:
Clearly, the microchip implanted in his head by the Pope, malfunctioned, and he was not informed of our newest world-domination directives from His Holiness.😉
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Nuts…stupid modern technology.
 
BListon said:
Clearly, the microchip implanted in his head by the Pope, malfunctioned, and he was not informed of our newest world-domination directives from His Holiness.😉
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Yep, but I thought that the microchips were planted in the heads of protestants since the Vatican has a computer registry of all protestants. At least thats what this one reading some evangelist at a christian rock concert. :whacky: Gotta keep tabs on the prods all the time ya know LOL;););)👍
 
My 80 year old dad, a Freemason whose religious education apparently stopped after a couple of years of Christian Scientist Sunday school, thinks that the Catholic Church is the only one that believes in Original Sin. :eek:
 
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