Our first argument over religion

[Evania]

Just offering some support, hell is a catholic belief not a literal place

You are right that Hell is a Catholic belief, which is why your reply is absurd…considering you’re on Catholic Answers.

In answer to the OP, pray the rosary for your husband. Continue to lead by example, such as St. Monica and St. Rita. Ask these saints to intercede for you! A wise priest once told St. Monica in regards to her concerns about her son, St. Augustine: “Work like it all depends upon you, but pray like it all depends upon God.”. Not only did St. Augustine convert, but he became a bishop, a great saint, and a Doctor of the Church! He credited his conversion upon the prayers of his mother. Keep in mind, God wants a relationship with your spouse. He will not neglect to hear your prayers.

God Bless!

 

[leamar3]

Thank you to all who have offered words of comfort. I didn’t mention this in the previous post, but I think that the influence DH has had on my oldest son is part of what worries me the most. I suppose that part of my reasoning behind sharing with DH that I think he needs to seek a relationship with God is because of the effect that he’s having on him. My son wants me to prove to him that God exists, and my husband claims that because he is a good person, that when his time comes (“If there is a God”) he will be judged based on his character. I find all of this to be incredibly frustrating, which is probably part of what kept fueling the argument. The notion of wanting to keep my marriage happy and fulfilling was over-coming my need to seek a fulfilling relationship with God.

I was sincerely questioning the effect my efforts were going to have on my marriage, and whether or not I should continue my journey toward the Catholic faith. I think the flaw with being part of the Methodist church is that there doesn’t seem to be much emphasis on the having reverence for God, and with DH and DS being raised in the Methodist church, I think this has affected their judgement. I could be completely wrong, and I don’t mean to offend anyone who is of the Methodist faith, this is just the conclusion I have come to through experience. I will continue to pray for my husband-and my oldest son, thank you again for the support.

 

[Contra_Mundum_1]

Leamar,

you will have to include your son into your prayers, preferably the Rosary. If your son is open to discussion then by all means use that opportunity. Learn as much as you can, ask questions here and engage with him. You be the one who asks him tough questions. Turn the tables a bit.

 

[aprilfloyd]

My apologies,

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So… Warning teachers about a shooter is inappropriate? Or sounding fire or tornado alarms is inappropriate? All warn people about very real things.​

Of course we should warn people, but if there was a hell, it would be front page news! - Hell is a catholic belief - I know that, but not a very real thing

I have noticed since joining this forum that a lof of people seem to be taking a more and more literal view of catholic teachings than when say compared to my experience in the 70s and 80s for example where things were viewed more symbolically and metaphorically.
Why is this?

 

[Steveabrous]

I have noticed since joining this forum that a lof of people seem to be taking a more and more literal view of catholic teachings than when say compared to my experience in the 70s and 80s for example where things were viewed more symbolically and metaphorically.
Why is this?

Because the poor catechisis, and liberal attitude towards orthodox teaching has caused a whole genration to walk away from the Catholic faith. I think you (from what you told me in a different thread) personify are the reason. You were raised Catholic, but reject it’s teachings and walked away from the faith. And it’s not your fault it’s the fault of the liberal 70’s and 80’s We woke up and realized that the children we raised “Catholic” were Co-habitating, living homosexual lifestyles, having abortions, etc. But not attending mass or living the faith.

 

[aprilfloyd]

Because the poor catechisis, and liberal attitude towards orthodox teaching has caused a whole genration to walk away from the Catholic faith. I think you (from what you told me in a different thread) personify are the reason. You were raised Catholic, but reject it’s teachings and walked away from the faith. And it’s not your fault it’s the fault of the liberal 70’s and 80’s We woke up and realized that the children we raised “Catholic” were Co-habitating, living homosexual lifestyles, having abortions, etc. But not attending mass or living the faith.

Thanks for that steveabrous and is a fair summation of my experience(s). I have been made to feel very unaccepted here just because my experiences of catholics and Catholicism don’t sit tidily with others - i don’t feel what I have to say is any less valid

 

[Mark121359]

Dear OP,

please don’t let your husband’s lack of belief keep you away from the church. I think it is very unusual for an unbelieving spouse to be just fine and happy about such a conversion. (The same applies if the spouse is a believer but not Catholic.) There are plenty of us in the same boat. No, it is not easy. Arguments happen. There is resentment, often on both sides.

I have found that the only way to cope is to leave it in God’s hands. Talking religion to a person who is antagonistic never helps, on the contrary, it drives them even further away. Just pray for him and don’t pressure him into anything. Be kind and loving and show him that your new faith will make you a better person and a better wife, and not drive you further apart, as he fears.

As for his salvation, what you can do is limited. You can be a good example and you can pray for him and never lose hope, but you can’t make him believe. Don’t burden yourself with this, because it is not up to you. Just be at peace and trust God.

Excellent!

I hope this has helped a bit. God bless.

 

[Mark121359]

Dear OP,

please don’t let your husband’s lack of belief keep you away from the church. I think it is very unusual for an unbelieving spouse to be just fine and happy about such a conversion. (The same applies if the spouse is a believer but not Catholic.) There are plenty of us in the same boat. No, it is not easy. Arguments happen. There is resentment, often on both sides.

I have found that the only way to cope is to leave it in God’s hands. Talking religion to a person who is antagonistic never helps, on the contrary, it drives them even further away. Just pray for him and don’t pressure him into anything. Be kind and loving and show him that your new faith will make you a better person and a better wife, and not drive you further apart, as he fears.

As for his salvation, what you can do is limited. You can be a good example and you can pray for him and never lose hope, but you can’t make him believe. Don’t burden yourself with this, because it is not up to you. Just be at peace and trust God.

I hope this has helped a bit. God bless.

Excellent!

 

[miguel]

Thanks for that steveabrous and is a fair summation of my experience(s). I have been made to feel very unaccepted here just because my experiences of catholics and Catholicism don’t sit tidily with others - i don’t feel what I have to say is any less valid

God loves you. If he accepts you, who am I not to accept you. You are my sister. What if hell is real? Wouldn’t you want to know that? Denial is not in anyone’s best interest. Does denial make the reality go away?

 

[Steveabrous]

Thanks for that steveabrous and is a fair summation of my experience(s). I have been made to feel very unaccepted here just because my experiences of catholics and Catholicism don’t sit tidily with others - i don’t feel what I have to say is any less valid

Your opinions are valid. I am sorry you were made to feel unaccepted. But you must realize that this forum assumes church doctrine is truth. This is not the place to challenge doctrine.

Look, sometimes this forum can be harsh ( myself included apparently). i have felt what you are feeling about this forum. But realize. this forum was set up so Catholics can talk to one another without our doctrines being constantly challenged as they are everywhere else. So when you come challenging doctrine it’s not going to be welcomed. That doesn’t mean your a bad person, or God doesn’t love you, or we hate you. But i’m sorry you do have to conform a little bit to be on this forum

 

[aprilfloyd]

Thanks,

Can you suggest another forum? With different religions on here I just assumed it would be OK to try and establish if catholic doctrine is true, which is more what I am interested in.

It’s the truth that interests me rather than blind acceptance - that is just too easy.

 

[Steveabrous]

Thanks,

Can you suggest another forum? With different religions on here I just assumed it would be OK to try and establish if catholic doctrine is true, which is more what I am interested in.

It’s the truth that interests me rather than blind acceptance - that is just too easy.

Conduct rules:

1. Non-Catholics are welcome to participate but must be respectful of the faith of the Catholics participating on the board.
2. Catholics must be charitable in their discussions about non-Catholic belief and practice.

Perhaps we are both guilty and just need to be more charitable with each other. I think there are non-catholic threads on this forum.

 

[adrift]

Thanks,

Can you suggest another forum? With different religions on here I just assumed it would be OK to try and establish if catholic doctrine is true, which is more what I am interested in.

It’s the truth that interests me rather than blind acceptance - that is just too easy.

You know it isn’t so much the challenge but the way that challenge is presented. I found it abrasive to read god when referring to my belief in God. Your challenges felt more like a troll than a sincere inquiring.

 

[aprilfloyd]

You know it isn’t so much the challenge but the way that challenge is presented. I found it abrasive to read god when referring to my belief in God. Your challenges felt more like a troll than a sincere inquiring.

Thanks again,

I can understand that, I tend to say god in the sense of all the different gods. I can forget that the christian tradition is capitalise so God, like Jehovah or John as in the name God rather than god as in greek gods christian gods, no offence is intended. Plus I come from a very large multicultural, family and the idea of one of the gods is the right one would be simply offensive as they all have different ones, with me be ‘the catholic’ so I tend not to suggest that the ‘catholic god’ is the only one

 

[adrift]

Thanks again,

I can understand that, I tend to say god in the sense of all the different gods. I can forget that the christian tradition is capitalise so God, like Jehovah or John as in the name God rather than god as in greek gods christian gods, no offence is intended. Plus I come from a very large multicultural, family and the idea of one of the gods is the right one would be simply offensive as they all have different ones, with me be ‘the catholic’ so I tend not to suggest that the ‘catholic god’ is the only one

The more I have seen of your post the more I realize this. I was trying to explain to you why the less than cordial response. Remember when in Rome…

 

[Anglewannabe]

I told him the other day that I’m really worried that because he doesn’t go to church, and he doesn’t have any faith that he won’t have salvation.

I want to be VERY careful with what I say here because I am not 100% sure but… saying ‘you won’t be saved’ has a very protestant sound.

 

[Tantum_ergo]

Thanks,

Can you suggest another forum? With different religions on here I just assumed it would be OK to try and establish if catholic doctrine is true, which is more what I am interested in.

It’s the truth that interests me rather than blind acceptance - that is just too easy.

Acceptance of a truth does not imply it is BLIND acceptance. Trying to make a false dichotomy --that the truth is somewhere OUTSIDE acceptance of the Church’s teachings–will only lead you to more confusion.