Please help...parenting question teenage boy

[jwatza]

To the one who suggests the use of condoms, it is never right to encourage our kids to do wrong even if the consequences on a temporal level seem great. Our Catholic faith teaches that condom use is a grave sin and to give our children permission to use such would be a grave sin.

Also, I think that one thing that should not be underestimated is the power of prayer. God loves our children more than we do. We can and should raise our children well, but we certainly don’t have control over everything they do. We do our part and then it is time to pray and leave them in the hands of a loving Father and a protective mother (Mary–their heavenly mother).

 

[kage_ar]

I totally agree. One of my sons made the team. The other one didn’t.
So the sad thing is, not everyone makes the team.

For my son who worked so hard and was so dedicated in training to make the team, it paid off…And I always know where he is.

Not to hijack your thread but - WOW. You are very blessed to live somewhere where the kids still have to try out for teams. No place we have lived has been that way. You sign up for a sport, if there are too many kids, the league just makes more teams. I

n school, same thing, you sign up for the sports you want to play. It is silly, because a huge percentage of the team will play in an actual game one time during the season for 15 seconds, they spend the rest of the season sitting on the bench. We dress out an ARMY, it looks silly and teaches the kids the wrong lessons.

 

[Jay82]

Not to hijack your thread but - WOW. You are very blessed to live somewhere where the kids still have to try out for teams. No place we have lived has been that way. You sign up for a sport, if there are too many kids, the league just makes more teams. I

n school, same thing, you sign up for the sports you want to play. It is silly, because a huge percentage of the team will play in an actual game one time during the season for 15 seconds, they spend the rest of the season sitting on the bench. We dress out an ARMY, it looks silly and teaches the kids the wrong lessons.

Wow, I didn’t even know their were schools that didn’t have tryouts and accepted all students who wanted to play. I think trying out for the sport and having cuts is an important part of facilitating dedication and hard work. It also adds a bit of prestige to playing on the team as well, something the kids can set as a goal for themselves.

Recreational sports leagues exist to provide teams for anyone who wants to play and they provide this outlet for kids interested. I think the schools should be providing a more competitive environment where kids must try out to make the teams.

 

[stringbeanduck]

Not to hijack your thread but - WOW. You are very blessed to live somewhere where the kids still have to try out for teams. No place we have lived has been that way. You sign up for a sport, if there are too many kids, the league just makes more teams. I

n school, same thing, you sign up for the sports you want to play. It is silly, because a huge percentage of the team will play in an actual game one time during the season for 15 seconds, they spend the rest of the season sitting on the bench. We dress out an ARMY, it looks silly and teaches the kids the wrong lessons.

I suppose it has to do with being fair and not hurting anyone’s feeling. Oh looks little Johnny came in last; no worries Johnny, you’re just the last winner. I agree though. If child has something to be dedicated to, it can teach a number of lessons to them.

 

[Methodi]

Every Child should have a chance to play, unless he is not interested, it`s a terrible thing for a kid to be left out, or feel left out

 

[kage_ar]

Every Child should have a chance to play, unless he is not interested, it`s a terrible thing for a kid to be left out, or feel left out

We are going WAY off topic, but, it is a terrible thing for a child not to understand that everyperson has talent and abilibies, but, not everyone is the same. It is terrible to allow a kid who has no talent or ability at football to be on a school team, just so they don’t have hurt feelings. That develops a sense of entitlement that will handicap the child for life.

If little Johnny has to try out, and he is not good enough at football to make the team, he will go and find something he IS good at. THAT develops good life coping skills.

 

[Magickman]

Good parenting is of paramount importance, and so very challenging.

So challenging, in fact, that I decided at a very young age, never to have children. And I am thankful that I did not lose my resolve.

For those who already have children, you have my prayers and sympathy.

For those not yet so afflicted, be forewarned.

Bottom line:

Do not get married.

Never have children.

 

[whatevergirl]

***My suggestion for your son to join a sports team, or activity after school wasn’t meant to take this thread off topic. It was just a suggestion.

It’s important to build trust in our kids, too. I trust my son, granted he hasn’t given us a reason to not trust him, but if I need to monitor him 24/7, I’m not doing something right as a parent, either. That’s not going to build trust…

Also, why are we thinking that kids only get in trouble after school? lol Kids can find trouble at any time, any day of the week, if that is what they are going to do. Kids getting into trouble doesn’t happen only between the hours of 2:30 pm and 6pm. haha I remember kids growing up, who were in trouble before school even started…so, it’s about training our kids to do right and turn away from wrong, when WE ARE NOT LOOKING.

That’s the key. A true test of anyone’s character is what he/she does when no one is watching.

I will also add, that kids who play sports are not automatically going to avoid trouble. It should lessen their desire to, and because of the time constraints on their schedules, they shouldn’t have the time to get into trouble–BUT–I remember kids back in my day, who were into pot and having sex with girls, and were great football players. It doesn’t automatically mean kids are going to stay out of trouble, but it typically lessens the time and desire for boys to get into trouble.

Girls also can get into trouble, folks. Girls are quite aggressive these days…they are asking out boys left and right, so we need to make sure they are busy with schoolwork, and doing some after school activities/clubs/sports too.

Good luck grace…I have a feeling this will all work out. You’re a great mom, from the sounds of it!! Just hit a speed bump, that’s all. I am praying that your son has learned from this. ***

 

[Methodi]

There is no magic answer, it`s the luck of the draw. Some horrible parents , somehow their kids turn out Beautifully, others who come from good christian families turn out horrible, & U cant know what ur kid is doing 24/7 no way, If U think U do, U are deceiving urself

 

[Methodi]

We are going WAY off topic, but, it is a terrible thing for a child not to understand that everyperson has talent and abilibies, but, not everyone is the same. It is terrible to allow a kid who has no talent or ability at football to be on a school team, just so they don’t have hurt feelings. That develops a sense of entitlement that will handicap the child for life.

If little Johnny has to try out, and he is not good enough at football to make the team, he will go and find something he IS good at. THAT develops good life coping skills.

Every Kid who wants to play, even if he isn`t good at it, he should be allowed, just my opinion, too much emphasis is put on winning, to me sports should be played for fun , for ust what it is. & Look at most big league sports figures, they are a mess

 

[stringbeanduck]

Every Kid who wants to play, even if he isn`t good at it, he should be allowed, just my opinion, too much emphasis is put on winning, to me sports should be played for fun , for ust what it is. & Look at most big league sports figures, they are a mess

Perhaps there is some confusion here. Are you saying every kid should be able to join any sports team he wants even if he ‘lacks the skill’ at it, or that he should be able to play the sport? I agree every kid should be able to play the sport, but I think it is very unfair to the team to stick a kid on there who lacks the good skills to play. That kid should go a on non competive team of some sort. Like a just for fun league.