Please pray for me and myfamily

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TheOldColonel said:
I’m not sure why you care so much about my opinion. It’s just an opinion. I think it’s a small matter because God’s forgiveness is sufficient. Those around him should also be forgiving. There’s no need to ruin a guy’s life over one mistake. Even law enforcement in this case is allowing him to just pay a fine and move on.

Those who judge and ridicule others because of sin will be judged. The Lord has made that quite clear.
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I neither ridiculed him nor judged him. The man is looking for advice on how to handle the situation, and you’re potentially misleading him by minimizing his offence.

I never said God wouldn’t forgive him but, practically speaking, he shouldn’t expect his wife to do so anytime soon. Even if he just made “one mistake,” that one mistake was attempted adultery, and that’s a very serious matter.
 
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I think he’ll be just fine if those around him refrain from making a big deal of it. We all make mistakes. We all learn lessons. That’s part of life.
 
TheOldColonel said:
I think he’ll be just fine if those around him refrain from making a big deal of it. We all make mistakes. We all learn lessons. That’s part of life.
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This wasn’t a little woopsie. He tried to commit adultery through illegal means, and he’s already found out what a serious impact it can have. Forgiveness is possible, but he needs to have realistic expectations, which you are not encouraging.
 
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Hopefully, his wife will forgive him, his employer will give him a second chance and he can resume his life having learned a valuable lesson. Don’t you think that would be a good outcome for him?
 
Let us wish him well. Never underestimate the power of forgiveness to heal us.
 
TheOldColonel said:
Let us wish him well. Never underestimate the power of forgiveness to heal us.
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Wish him well, sure, but don’t give him false hope. God’s forgiveness is a whole different ball of wax from that of human beings, and naivete is a luxury the OP can’t afford right now.
 
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I think you have it backwards. God forgives with greater ease than human beings. Doesn’t that make more sense? All hope comes from God.
 
TheOldColonel said:
God forgives with greater ease than human beings. Doesn’t that make more sense? All hope comes from God.
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That’s what I was saying. God will forgive him if he’s sorry, but he shouldn’t expect the same of his wife right now.
 
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You don’t know that. She might be quite forgiving. I’ve seen that many times in marriages. But there’s always an interesting dynamic at work in such cases.

The less one trusts in God’s kindness and mercy themselves, the harder it becomes to imagine another who has sinned being its recipient. Doubting such forgiveness, one is unable to be merciful, and the tendency then rather becomes to label, to judge, to scold, and to wish punishment upon the sinner.

But Jesus came to show us mercy and to tell us to “stop judging.” Indeed, he commands it.

In scripture, God chooses to forget our sins. Satan chooses to remind us of our sins.
 
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And my theory on that, (name removed by moderator), is the OP has brewed in sin for a long time before this particular occasion. He has likely been addicted to pornography, and has likely had trouble with self-control, and will likely need weeks and weeks of help. I bet you he has also spoken incorrectly about women before this happened. I bet you he has poor impulse control in other areas of his life, such as eating. On the way to the prostitute, he probably had to pick up money from an ATM. He could have stopped his plan then. But he didn’t.

The Old Colonel lives in another time when women would forgive more quickly because there were strong economic imperatives leading to the conclusion that staying together is best. A woman in earlier times would be hard-pressed to find a job or to move out or to move her husband out. Now a woman will have the guy move out without waiting a minute. He will likely stay at some friend’s apartment for a bit and then have to find his own place. I know these are generalizations, but this is the most common scenario.

This is no small thing, Old Colonel. Talk about mercy all you want but 7/10 divorces are led by women these days. I’d say infidelity is one of the greatest causes of this.
 
To the OP:
I will pray for you.

I think CajunJoy and brian_custer already gave you some very good advice, I don’t have anything more to add there.

Jesus is ready to forgive you. You may have to work a little harder to make amends with your wife, and go to counseling. Ask your priest to help you.

Be glad that the Lord willed you to get caught right away before you went too far down this road and got even deeper into sin. Remember that the Lord came to save sinners. Learn from your mistake and don’t do it again.

I will pray for the drug addict named Chris as well.

I have seen other guys go through some public humiliation like this and they were able to bounce back from it if they repented and didn’t do it again. It’s a tough road but you can do it with the help of Jesus and Mary. Offer up your humiliation as reparation to Our Lord. We are all pulling for you.

P.S. Once you have repented and confessed, I note that Divine Mercy Sunday is coming up. if I were you, I would be sure to participate in the Church devotions on that day. It is a good way to receive the Mercy of our loving Lord Jesus Christ.
God bless.
 
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To the OP, get your ship in order. You need to have your shipmates set you straight. And as one of those shipmates, I’m giving you tough love. Start with increasing discipline in all areas of your life. Wake up the same time every day. Eat less. Pray more. Exercise more. Get off the computer, limiting yourself to twenty minutes per day of the internet. Beg your wife for forgiveness when she is ready. Play outdoors with your kids. Have a strict purpose in your work life. Visit your family of origin.
 
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Time is a great healer, go to confession, say the rosary for your marriage. Will pray for you.
 
I pray for you.

It’s just an horrible story. You could be thankful for being caught before it’s will be too late.

I am sorry for your wife and your marriage. It’s so sad…

You seems to understand your sins, be shameful alnd repent. It’s what matters.

See forgiveness from the Lord. Go to confession. Pray all days.
See a way to gain more self control in this area. Perhaps see a psychologist, a conselor? join a paryer group?

And be repent with your wife. Submit you to her, say you are sorry for the bad you’ve done to her, that you will not start again. I hope that ultimately she will forgive you and you will reunited again.
A marriage therapy is perhaps need to overcome the trauma and have a new start.

And see other job if you will finally fired.
 
I read the post. BTW- Please be more polite than to suggest I didn’t read the post.

Remember: Forgiveness heals not only the recipient but the giver as well.
 
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