Jay, i hope you can get some comfort from this poem i came accross a while ago, its called
Prayer for Consolation
i’ll lend you for a little while , a child of mine God said,for you to love the while she lives and mourn for when she’s dead. It may be six or seven years or forty two or three; but will you till i call her back take care of her for me, She’ll bring her charms to gladden you, and should her stay be brief you’ll have her lovely memories as a solace for your grief. I cannot promise she will stay since all from earth return; But there are lessons taught below i want this child to learn. I’ve looked the whole world over in my search for teacher’s true, and from the things that crowd lifes lane, i have chosen you, Now will you give her all your love, nor think the labour vain, nor hate me when i come to take this lent child back again. I fancied that i heard them say Dear Lord, thy will be done, for all the joys thy child will bring the risk of grief we’ll run. We’ll shelter her with tenderness. We’ll love her while we may, and for the happiness we’ve known forever grateful stay. but should thy angels call for her much sooner than we planned, we’ll brave the bitter grief that comes and try to understand.
still Praying for you. God bless