Praying and negotiating with God

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Firstly, I am posting this not because I am encouraging people to make a deal with God. I am not in a position to say whether it is ok or not because I don’t know. I am posting to ask if anyone has experienced asking God for something important to you, that you went so far as to negotiate with God, such as promising to do something etc.

I ask because I came across Sr. Burns’ tweets, attached here. She wanted to find her ToB materials and promised God to do something everyday for the rest of her life. She says it has to be a big sacrifice, but doable.

I read of a mom who prayed for her child’s conversion, and at one point in her frustration, told God to do whatever He wants with her so long as her son converts. Shortly after she was found to be gravely ill, but her son did convert, although he didn’t know at that time what his mom prayed for.(Please Note: This uploaded content is no longer available.) (Please Note: This uploaded content is no longer available.) (Please Note: This uploaded content is no longer available.) (Please Note: This uploaded content is no longer available.)
 
I personally don’t tend to make deals with God, but you could do it I imagine.

My impression is that Sister Helena was kind of wanting to do the thing she promised anyway, or thinking about it, and God gave her a little push.

The concern I would have is that, unless it was a promise to do something I’m supposed to be doing anyway (e.g. make every effort not to sin; go to Mass every Sunday; etc.) I might get lax or unable to keep the commitment to God and then I would be breaking my promise. I don’t want to promise things that I might not be able to do.

Sister Helena is, I’m sure, aware of that pitfall and is likely used to negotiating with God and it’s how she and God get along. Might not work for everybody and I especially wouldn’t recommend it to somebody at a more basic level of spiritual development than a Sister who has gone through a lot of formation.
 
Right, I also do not want to make promises if I’m unsure I could keep them. Making promises isn’t something to be taken lightly.

I am still interested to know if anybody has made a promise or ‘deal’ with God and what followed after that.

Any examples?
 
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fin said:
Any examples?
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Well, as a kid (I’m from non-practicing family) I used to try doing deals with God, and they never worked out. I offered Him many things- be it from being better person or start practicing my faith, even going to Church. God never did his part, so I guess he relieved me of doing mine too- mercy, if you ask me now.

For me, deals with God never worked out, so I stopped doing them. I simply ask and plead, and set my goals, but never as condition for something. However, I used to be scared that if I fail with my goals, God won’t hear my pleas either. It’s not that I ever make deal with God, because it feels to me like saying “if you dont grant me X, I won’t do Y”. That’s my personality, I guess there are some people who are able to do deals with God rather fine.

What I sometimes do is tell God that if something happens, I will do something else. This is mostly about things that are my choices, not really stuff that’s obviously good or bad spiritually. It’s usually something along the lines of “if this girl appears now I’ll invite her to lunch, otherwise I’ll invite other one”.
 
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fin said:
that you went so far as to negotiate with God
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I imagine we’ve all done something like this somewhere along the way. But really, what do I have that God could use in such a barter exchange? My Manchester United game jersey is hardly what He’s looking for. I prefer the old “ask and it shall be given”.
 
I used to, when I was little.
But I’m older now, and don’t believe that God “holds out” on us just for the lolz. I believe my Father can do anything, and what little puny things can I do in return? If there is something, I should prolly be doing it anyway, but that’s besides the point.

At the risk of falling into the trap of saying that if we work up enough faith, we can get everything we want, I do believe it’s possible for us to block the flow of blessing and grace.
For instance, maybe we’re estranged from a loved one, and we get tense and overreactive when we’re around that person. Then that’s sets off a cycle of frustration and misunderstanding.
In that case, we can bring ourselves to God, ask for His healing over the situation, and then figure out how to break our part of the negativity with this other person.
Maybe that means praying more, more frequent confession, whatever.
 
Prayer is for confirming our will to His not the other way around.
 
Thanks for the replies. As I said in the original post, this is not an endorsement of negotiating with God. That is why I made it clear from the onset. I am simply asking if anyone had done so. Thanks to those who provided examples.

It does not have to be too big. For example some people promise to publish thanks when they receive ehat they asked for. They received, and would go on to publish their thanks to St Anthony or St Jude.

Anyone else?
 
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Thank you for providing examples and actually reading my original post, at least someone did.
 
Negotiating with God is something I will never do.

For example I would never tell Him I need money really fast and if I win the lottery I will never miss Mass again. I would think He would be highly offended.

Anytime I ask for anything through prayer I always add “if it be His will” or “if it be Your will”
 
Thank you for your testimony. But I was asking about those who had done so. I am not recommending anyone to make a deal eith God. Please read my OP.
 
I remembered that I told God that if I win a big prize in the lottery, like the jackpot, I’ll split it with him. 😃
It was more like a humorous bargain though, I didn’t really expect him to give me the prize. Probably because he thinks it wouldn’t be good for me.
But I would keep the promise if I did win a big prize.
 
I read the entire thread before I posted.

Just relating my thoughts on the matter.
 
Tis_Bearself said:
I remembered that I told God that if I win a big prize in the lottery, like the jackpot, I’ll split it with him. 😃
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I worked with a lady who used to go to casinos a lot and she tithed all her winnings.
She said it was her deal with God.
She never won enough to quit her job, though.
 
I had a cheesy little side job to make extra cash for a while and I split everything I made with God. It was kind of fun picking out churches and charities to send money to. I had to quit the side job though when people all started dying like flies in my family and my real job got busier.
 
When people start making deals with God, there are generally two things at play:
  1. they are trying to control God; it is “bargaining”; if I do this, then you will do that…right?
  2. Often, they are not willing to give the matter to God, and let God be God (as in, sometimes the answer is “No.”, and sometimes the answer is “NO!”)
 
Decades ago, Rita Rizzo, lying paralyzed on a bed, pleaded with God: “Lord, You did not bring me this far only to leave me paralyzed on this bed. If you allow me to walk, I will build a shrine in the heart of the bible belt.”

Worked out pretty well for Mother Mary Angelica and EWTN.
 
CelticWarlord said:
I prefer the old “ask and it shall be given”.
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Right. I think that’s reasonable. Though many people feel like God does not give when asked, and feel like they should banter something in exchange. Especially when they feel like he would not grant that wish normally. It’s also a nice thing to do stuff for God while asking, but to me it feels like thin ice to walk on.
 
OrbisNonSufficit said:
Though many people feel like God does not give when asked
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I think a great deal depends on our expectations of what, exactly, constitutes answered prayer, as well as what and why we are requesting. For me personally I don’t seek intervention when it comes to situations I am expected to handle without the need of a miracle. What I ask for, and am always given, is the strength and fortitude, the insight and enlightenment, the mettle and the reason for entering into various aspects of life which seem both unfair and unreasonable. It can be very difficult and unpleasant, but no worse than what Jesus put up with. 🙂
 
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