Priest Chatting With Kids During Mass..?

[robwar]

I can assure you, my title was not meant to mislead. I was trying to think of how to word the title…and I came up with “chatting” because that is what is done (asked if they are nice to their siblings, if they had a nice week, excited about Christmas, etc). I honestly did not know it was called the “children’s liturgy” as I’m not familiar with it. At any rate, I will definitely not seek out another parish, I love mine! The priest who does the “chatting” is retired and isn’t there every week. Honestly, it just makes me sad. Like another poster said, it has a very Protestant “feel” to it, which is fine…except we’re not Protestant.

Oh, and yes, they come back after the host has been transformed.

to be honest with you, this is a ridiculous complaint. The priest talks to children leaving at the liturgy of the word geared for them. So he is friendly and maybe asks a few questions etc. So what. Give it a rest. There are enough real problems in the Church keeping young families involved and attending Masses than this attitude. The priest smiles and talk to children. What a major problem issue this is. There is such a false notion of what is or isn’t reverent here. Also, i would stop the “protestant” feel comment. Unless you have been to a “protestant” church service, I would suggest you hold the false comparison. “Protestant” can range from high liturgy Anglican to low Church pentecostal. Most “protestant” searches don’t have a CLOW going on. So according to you, a priest that actually talks to children when dismissed in a CLOW is a big issues and liturgy abuse. So reaching out to young children is just a worst. Oh please.

 

[dailey]

I stand by my opinion that chatting in front of the blessed sacrament is disrespectful…and by the replies that I have received, it seems that others agree.

I have a suggestion for you that works well for me. If I come across a post that upsets me, and it definitely seems like this one hit a chord with you, I just move on. No point in getting yourself worked up, it’s just not worth it.

 

[SMHW]

Children’s Liturgy is not new nor is it an abuse…If this is done right, the children are typically called up to the front after the introduction and Collect by the priest or deacon (I have been asked many times to address the children and send them out) and a very short message is given to them and possibly a blessing. While out of Mass they go over the Liturgy of the Word just like the rest of the congregation, same readings which are taken from the Mass of the day.
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If what you witness is different than this then maybe you have a local problem.

A local problem is what it seems like to me.

Not every Catholic is a fan of Children’s Liturgy of the Word but if it is done correctly then it is certainly **NOT **an abuse.
But if the OP is correct and the children do not return on time and are doing crafts rather than participating in an actual Liturgy then this is a VERY faulty implementation of Children’s Liturgy of the Word.

 

[Lapey]

I can assure you, my title was not meant to mislead. I was trying to think of how to word the title…and I came up with “chatting” because that is what is done (asked if they are nice to their siblings, if they had a nice week, excited about Christmas, etc). I honestly did not know it was called the “children’s liturgy” as I’m not familiar with it. At any rate, I will definitely not seek out another parish, I love mine! The priest who does the “chatting” is retired and isn’t there every week. Honestly, it just makes me sad. Like another poster said, it has a very Protestant “feel” to it, which is fine…except we’re not Protestant.

Oh, and yes, they come back after the host has been transformed.

If this is done right it is not protestant at all, on the contrary it is very Catholic.

Where are our roots, the Jewish faith. What do the examples of the Jewish celebrations show us about this? Were there children present in the temple and/or synagogues? Remember now, Jesus as a 12 year old would have been equivalent to our kids at 18 or 20 year olds, young adults. The temple would have been attended by adult males. Now I ask you, would the children and females not been taught the faith? I would say they most definitely would have been taught.

I know I am over simplifying this but this is what the children’s liturgy is, educating the little ones on their level until they are able to enter fully into the celebration as older kids.

I underlined the largest issue in your example. They need to be present for the Sacrifice.

 

[TimothyH]

I was not aware that this practice is as widespread as people on this thread seem to indicate and I am very surprised.

There simply is no theological reason for the children to be absent for any part of the Mass. It deprives them of tremendous graces to miss the consecration. This is the most spectacular event in all of creation. God comes down out of heaven, hides himself under the appearance of bread, ministers to us and makes himself available to us. As baptized members of the Church they have a right to be present. It is an injustice to the children to deprive them of these graces. It is worse than denying them food.

And Mass is worship. Mass is not catechesis. Worship is an obligation we have to God because of who he is who we are. He is the creator who holds us in existence from moment to moment and worship is his by right. It is an injustice to God not to give him the worship which is his by right and that applies to children as well. Parent have a moral obligation to teach their children how to worship.

I would never permit my children to be deprived of the graces of Mass nor abdicate my responsibility as a parent to teach them proper worship by example.

Then children were brought to him that he might lay his hands on them and pray. The disciples rebuked the people; but Jesus said, “Let the children come to me, and do not hinder them; for to such belongs the kingdom of heaven.” (Matthew 19:13-14)

Don’t these people read the Bible?

-Tim-

 

[Lapey]

I stand by my opinion that chatting in front of the blessed sacrament is disrespectful…and by the replies that I have received, it seems that others agree.

I have a suggestion for you that works well for me. If I come across a post that upsets me, and it definitely seems like this one hit a chord with you, I just move on. No point in getting yourself worked up, it’s just not worth it.

Are your words aimed at me? I hope I didn’t make you think I was upset if they are meant for me. That wasn’t my intent. Simply stating that what you describe is not what children’s liturgy should be and I described what it SHOULD look like. If those things you say happened, then there are serious problems.

 

[SMHW]

I was not aware that this practice is as widespread as people on this thread seem to indicate and I am very surprised.

I certainly hope what was described by the OP is not widespread.

There simply is no theological reason for the children to be absent for any part of the Mass. It deprives them of tremendous graces to miss the consecration.

Exactly.

But the Mass is divided in to two parts: The Liturgy of the Word and the Liturgy of the Eucharist. Children’s Liturgy of the Word is an approved way for children to attend a Liturgy of the Word that happens concurrently with the one which takes place in the nave of the Church but which uses an approved Children’s lectionary rather than the standard Missal.

It is expected that children are back in the nave to participate in the Liturgy of the Eucharist.

 

[Steve_Timm]

I can understand how some would feel about this!!

At my Church, (I am Lutheran) the kids are brought up to the front of the altar and the Pastor gives a short kids lesson. I have found I learn a lot from the kids lesson!! It has been my experience in the Church that the kids are quite well behaved. I have never really noticed any serious misbehavior.

I do agree though that kids need to learn the solemnity of the Mass and be taught not only what the Mass is and what it contains, but why it is important to be respectful during the homily, Eucharist etc.

God Bless!!

 

[7_Sorrows]

Are your words aimed at me? I hope I didn’t make you think I was upset if they are meant for me. That wasn’t my intent. Simply stating that what you describe is not what children’s liturgy should be and I described what it SHOULD look like. If those things you say happened, then there are serious problems.

No. I don’t believe they were aimed at you.

 

[ProVobis]

Do you go to my church, lol??? We sit in the front row and I cant tell you how many times I’ve had people come up to me and my husband after mass and tell me how well behaved our kids are. My daughter said to me one time “of course we don’t misbehave, we are in church” She could not understand why anyone would make a big deal about it, lol

At the local weekly Spanish Mass, the kids (at least most of them) sit up front and the parents more in back. Seems to work okay for the priest and everyone else.

 

[Vasallus]

There are bigger things to worry about. Kids are easily bored. If the priest engages them, they may not stop coming to mass when they’re 16.

 

[dailey]

Are your words aimed at me? I hope I didn’t make you think I was upset if they are meant for me. That wasn’t my intent. Simply stating that what you describe is not what children’s liturgy should be and I described what it SHOULD look like. If those things you say happened, then there are serious problems.

No Lapey, you’re good!

 

[CommonWeal]

I know some churches dismiss kids (under the age of 5) during mass to learn about the scriptures…then bring them back during the Our Father. I don’t know when or why this started, personally, I think it’s a bad idea but that’s just me. At any rate, we have 2 priest at our parish. One of them quickly dismisses the kids and when it’s time for them to come back, does is discreetly. However, the other priest chats with the kids before they get dismissed and then chats with them when they get back. And then we are always told to clap for the kids as they turn around and show us their drawings.

I just don’t get it. Mass is not playtime and I find it very, very upsetting, for lack of a better word, that these kids are not being taught to have the UTMOST respect for mass service. This priest did mention that if anyone found his “chattyness” too much to let him know. I admit, I have been tempted to write him a brief letter stating my feelings (probably would never do it though because I wouldn’t want to hurt his feelings). Lastly, what I find as really surprising…is that most of the parishioners laugh and clap and seem to enjoy this mini “break” in mass??

Just wanted to throw this out there to see what you all have to say…

Oh Dear God.

 

[CommonWeal]

I don’t agree with sending kids away during Mass. There is no good reason.

Children nowadays are not taught to sit still and be quiet but are given almost constant stimulation. They can’t function unless they have video’s in the back of the minivan and headphones in their ears as they get older. They need to be taught how to sit still and be quiet when time and place demand it and no time and place demand it more than Church.

Sitting still aside, there is no theological reason why they should not be exposed to Mass or should only be exposed to parts of the Mass. They should be present for the word of God, all the prayers, and see mom and dad giving money.

Part of the problem with misbehaved children is that they are kept in the back. No kid wants to look at some guys back or the back of some lady’s head. They should be seated in the front row where they can see the priest and the servers. The best behaved children at my parish all sit in the front rows. The ones in the back are making all the noise.

-Tim-

Amen. Amen. Our two year old sits with us during Mass. In fact, our entire parish is filled with many large families and their adorable little ones, all of whom are well behaved. It comes down to intentional parenting as a Catholic mother/father. In the life of a child, there will always be times when it is appropriate to remove children, either because they are very young and crying, or older and need to be disciplined. But those times should be understood as the exception and not the rule.

 

[Phemie]

There are at least two parishes in my town that do this.** I think it’s technically allowed, for the children to have their own Liturgy of the Word, but I’m pretty sure it has to be focused on the Mass readings that the adults are hearing, and not just “Bible stories” **such as Noah’s Ark or Jonah. (Unless the readings are about those stories.)

Yes, according to the Directory on Masses with Children, it’s allowed for the children to be dismissed to their own Liturgy of the Word, and you’re correct, it should be the readings of the day, at least the Gospel and one other. The Canadian Bishops have issued a document on this practice. Their take:

• it’s to be infrequent, to conform to what the “Directory…” says;
• it’s to be a true Liturgy of the Word;
• if a pencil or crayon comes into play you’re doing it wrong.

But they are to return before the Liturgy of the Eucharist and they should be returning to their parents during the collection or at some point before the Prayers over the Offerings. Missing almost the entire Liturgy of Eucharist is not was is envisaged by that document.

 

[CommonWeal]

I was not aware that this practice is as widespread as people on this thread seem to indicate and I am very surprised.

There simply is no theological reason for the children to be absent for any part of the Mass. It deprives them of tremendous graces to miss the consecration. This is the most spectacular event in all of creation. God comes down out of heaven, hides himself under the appearance of bread, ministers to us and makes himself available to us. As baptized members of the Church they have a right to be present. It is an injustice to the children to deprive them of these graces. It is worse than denying them food.

And Mass is worship. Mass is not catechesis. Worship is an obligation we have to God because of who he is who we are. He is the creator who holds us in existence from moment to moment and worship is his by right. It is an injustice to God not to give him the worship which is his by right and that applies to children as well. Parent have a moral obligation to teach their children how to worship.

I would never permit my children to be deprived of the graces of Mass nor abdicate my responsibility as a parent to teach them proper worship by example.

Then children were brought to him that he might lay his hands on them and pray. The disciples rebuked the people; but Jesus said, "Let the children come to me, and do not hinder them; for to such belongs the kingdom of heaven." (Matthew 19:13-14)

Don’t these people read the Bible?

-Tim-

Amen. Amen.

 

[TimothyH]

I certainly hope what was described by the OP is not widespread.

Exactly.

But the Mass is divided in to two parts: The Liturgy of the Word and the Liturgy of the Eucharist. **Children’s Liturgy of the Word is an approved way for children to attend a Liturgy of the Word that happens concurrently with the one which takes place in the nave of the Church but which uses an approved Children’s lectionary rather than the standard Missal.

It is expected that children are back in the nave to participate in the Liturgy of the Eucharist.**

This makes sense and sounds reasonable.

Missing the consecration and making crafts, not so much.

-Tim-

 

[TimothyH]

There are bigger things to worry about. Kids are easily bored. If the priest engages them, they may not stop coming to mass when they’re 16.

They are not bored if they sit in the first row and can see the readers, priest, deacon, servers, cantor and all the action. They are bored because they are stuck in the back looking at the back of some guys head.

The kids in the front row are typically well behaved. The ones in the back are the one’s making all the noise.

-Tim-

 

[Vasallus]

They are not bored if they sit in the first row and can see the readers, priest, deacon, servers, cantor and all the action. They are bored because they are stuck in the back looking at the back of some guys head.

The kids in the front row are typically well behaved. The ones in the back are the one’s making all the noise.

-Tim-

Sometimes. And there’s still nothing wrong with a priest that interacts with them.

 

[robwar]

Yes, according to the Directory on Masses with Children, it’s allowed for the children to be dismissed to their own Liturgy of the Word, and you’re correct, it should be the readings of the day, at least the Gospel and one other. The Canadian Bishops have issued a document on this practice. Their take:

• it’s to be infrequent, to conform to what the “Directory…” says;
• it’s to be a true Liturgy of the Word;
• if a pencil or crayon comes into play you’re doing it wrong.

But they are to return before the Liturgy of the Eucharist and they should be returning to their parents during the collection or at some point before the Prayers over the Offerings. Missing almost the entire Liturgy of Eucharist is not was is envisaged by that document.

Any parish that I’ve seen have CLOW has the children return during the collection. This is also usually done at one Mass and if Op is so bothered by the priest being friendly or smiling at children before being dismissed, attend another Mass.