K
kwray
Guest
Here’s some more info related to your previous post (sorry, I didn’t do the quotes properly):
>>I honestly don’t know everything she does. We have not had a formal class, but have learned from different people informally over many years. She is a naturopath (in training) and so also uses techniques (like muscle testing) that vary from non-traditional to wacky, depending on your point of view. Her main tool is an electronic fertility monitor that uses urine sticks. She also checks cervial mucous (don’t know if that’s the same as cervical fluid) and charts/counts days in her cycles (she used to be very regular).<<
When a woman is not ovulating regularly, counting days and using electronic monitors (the vast majority of which employ rhythm method calculations) are not going to be helpful. You need to be able to identify when she is infertile without waiting around for ovulation to occur.
>>We talk about taking an NFP class but they are too expensive for us and they are usually scheduled at times we can’t attend - I work days and nights during the week, and all day Sat. and Sun., and she is driving kids everywhere, etc.<<
My husband and I teach the Billings Method. I don’t know what policies are where you live, but we do not charge for instruction, just for supplies. In some areas there is a one-time fee. I have never heard of Billings instructors charging ongoing fees for follow-ups. There is an initial presentation (about an hour) and then follow-ups can happen by phone. There is also the possibility of learning remotely, if you don’t have an accredited instructor in your area. Also, most NFP teachers will waive all or part of the fees if there is serious financial need. Whatever method you choose, the investment of time it will take to learn it with an instructor will be well worth it… the alternative is always being uncertain about your wife’s state of fertility until she is no longer having any signs of fertility, which may be years away.
>>I have heard others say that sperm cannot survive more than 24 hrs or so in “non-fertile” cervical mucous, but I also saw a post somewhere (maybe on this forum) from a man who said he had 2 children as evidence to the contrary. <<
Sperm live less than 30 minutes without fertile mucus. That being said, if a couple has not properly learned a method (or is not properly following the rules), they may conceive on a day they thought was infertile. This can be because the observations are not being made correctly (for example there may be too small of an amount of mucus to be visible, but the woman can still sense the change in sensation - but if she has been taught to rely on visual observations only, she will conclude she has no mucus). Or, the couple may have intercourse in the morning, and the fertile mucus may have begun during the night and the woman may not have noticed it yet. Learning a method properly (ie. with an instructor, and receiving regular follow-up) is the best way to remove that uncertainty.
>>Maybe we’re not using NFP to its full potential, but unless there are highly reliable techniques we don’t know about that work even during (peri)menopause, I don’t know if it will work for us. Maybe it would be better to say we’re using a combination of NFP (when its highly accurate/reliable) and abstinence (when NFP is too risky).<<
There are 3 methods of NFP which have very high effectiveness ratings across all stages of reproductive life, including perimenopause (Billings, symptothermal, and Creighton). You can check their websites for more detailed numbers. We are Billings teachers, so perhaps we are biased that way, but I personally like that there’s only one thing to observe, and you get a positive identification of infertility, even when ovulation is not happening regularly. I know the other methods are effective, too… it’s just that taking temperatures becomes less helpful as ovulation happens less regularly. I would definitely recommend learning one of these methods, since as your wife becomes less and less fertile, your current method will result in you having to abstain more and more often. Periodic bleeding usually continues for some time after ovulation has stopped.
>>I honestly don’t know everything she does. We have not had a formal class, but have learned from different people informally over many years. She is a naturopath (in training) and so also uses techniques (like muscle testing) that vary from non-traditional to wacky, depending on your point of view. Her main tool is an electronic fertility monitor that uses urine sticks. She also checks cervial mucous (don’t know if that’s the same as cervical fluid) and charts/counts days in her cycles (she used to be very regular).<<
When a woman is not ovulating regularly, counting days and using electronic monitors (the vast majority of which employ rhythm method calculations) are not going to be helpful. You need to be able to identify when she is infertile without waiting around for ovulation to occur.
>>We talk about taking an NFP class but they are too expensive for us and they are usually scheduled at times we can’t attend - I work days and nights during the week, and all day Sat. and Sun., and she is driving kids everywhere, etc.<<
My husband and I teach the Billings Method. I don’t know what policies are where you live, but we do not charge for instruction, just for supplies. In some areas there is a one-time fee. I have never heard of Billings instructors charging ongoing fees for follow-ups. There is an initial presentation (about an hour) and then follow-ups can happen by phone. There is also the possibility of learning remotely, if you don’t have an accredited instructor in your area. Also, most NFP teachers will waive all or part of the fees if there is serious financial need. Whatever method you choose, the investment of time it will take to learn it with an instructor will be well worth it… the alternative is always being uncertain about your wife’s state of fertility until she is no longer having any signs of fertility, which may be years away.
>>I have heard others say that sperm cannot survive more than 24 hrs or so in “non-fertile” cervical mucous, but I also saw a post somewhere (maybe on this forum) from a man who said he had 2 children as evidence to the contrary. <<
Sperm live less than 30 minutes without fertile mucus. That being said, if a couple has not properly learned a method (or is not properly following the rules), they may conceive on a day they thought was infertile. This can be because the observations are not being made correctly (for example there may be too small of an amount of mucus to be visible, but the woman can still sense the change in sensation - but if she has been taught to rely on visual observations only, she will conclude she has no mucus). Or, the couple may have intercourse in the morning, and the fertile mucus may have begun during the night and the woman may not have noticed it yet. Learning a method properly (ie. with an instructor, and receiving regular follow-up) is the best way to remove that uncertainty.
>>Maybe we’re not using NFP to its full potential, but unless there are highly reliable techniques we don’t know about that work even during (peri)menopause, I don’t know if it will work for us. Maybe it would be better to say we’re using a combination of NFP (when its highly accurate/reliable) and abstinence (when NFP is too risky).<<
There are 3 methods of NFP which have very high effectiveness ratings across all stages of reproductive life, including perimenopause (Billings, symptothermal, and Creighton). You can check their websites for more detailed numbers. We are Billings teachers, so perhaps we are biased that way, but I personally like that there’s only one thing to observe, and you get a positive identification of infertility, even when ovulation is not happening regularly. I know the other methods are effective, too… it’s just that taking temperatures becomes less helpful as ovulation happens less regularly. I would definitely recommend learning one of these methods, since as your wife becomes less and less fertile, your current method will result in you having to abstain more and more often. Periodic bleeding usually continues for some time after ovulation has stopped.
No fair!
But that is getting off topic…
