Proper Dress and Behavior for Catholic Men

[Kilo1Mike21]

Agree…

 

[trenford3]

I generally go with slacks and a dress shirt, with a tie in fall/winter. I wear polo shirts and slacks through the spring/summer.

 

[palmas85]

If you were going on a job interview what would you wear? If you were going to meet the President of the United States, what would you wear? If you were having a private audience with the Pope, what would you wear?

I would truly hope that one would have at least the same respect and hopefully more for Christ in the Blessed Sacrament and the Holy Sacrifice of the Mass as they would for the above three examples.

However, it would seem that many do not.

My question would be and has been for many years why they do not.

 

[Extempore]

If you were going on a job interview what would you wear? If you were going to meet the President of the United States, what would you wear? If you were having a private audience with the Pope, what would you wear?

I would truly hope that one would have at least the same respect and hopefully more for Christ in the Blessed Sacrament and the Holy Sacrifice of the Mass as they would for the above three examples.

However, it would seem that many do not.

My question would be and has been for many years why they do not.

I agree, which is why I think the financial arguments about not dressing up for Church are overblown.

I’d like to hazard a guess that the vast majority of the population - regardless of economic circumstance - would show up to a private meeting with the President wearing a suit and tie.

Sad to say, we’re lazy and Church has become less important than it should. I’d love to hear other explanations but this seems to be the inevitable conclusion.

 

[Extempore]

For those who are still confused about what to wear to Mass and would like some visual aids, we have:

GOOD:

http://careers.slu.edu/images/Attire/MaleBusCas.jpg

BETTER:

https://www.murrayontravel.com

BEST:

http://www.frankcasey.co.nz/images/suit_morning_00.jpg

BAD:

http://www.ultimatepartyshop.com/shopimages/products/normal/25260.jpg

WORSE:

- Mooncostumes

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www.mooncostumes.com

WORST:

http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/319IhcdtvmL.AA280.jpg

 

[Ottaviani]

I’m guessing this would still be unacceptable:
http://www.funpicsfree.com/photogallery/newfunnypics031508/redneck-man.jpg

 

[damooster]

I would truly hope that one would have at least the same respect and hopefully more for Christ in the Blessed Sacrament and the Holy Sacrifice of the Mass as they would for the above three examples.

However, it would seem that many do not.

My question would be and has been for many years why they do not.

I personally wear dress pants and a collared shirt, but how does clothing material equate to reverence?

To elaborate, what if someone spends just as much time preparing their jeans and polo shirt as I do preparing my slacks and shirt? Is that not reverent enough? Pressing jeans is a lot more time consuming than pressing a pair of slacks is.

My personal opinion, and this is just my opinion, is that people spend so much time dressing up for Church as a sort of reminder that they are about to participate in something fantastic. But people can be just as reverent in a pair of jeans as they can in a pair of slacks.

And let me reverse your “what would you wear in front of the President question:” if I were the President, and I invited you to come over to the White House to chat, I would want you to dress in a matter that is comfortable for you so that more time can be spent on what we’re meeting about. In other words, I want you to come as you.

Not trying to be argumentative, just my opinions.

 

[DavidPalm]

And let me reverse your “what would you wear in front of the President question:” if I were the President, and I invited you to come over to the White House to chat, I would want you to dress in a matter that is comfortable for you so that more time can be spent on what we’re meeting about. In other words, I want you to come as you.

Hint: We don’t go to Mass to “chat” with Jesus. I "chat’ with our Lord at night when I’m in bed in my pajamas. No problem.

The Holy Sacrifice of the Mass on the Lord’s own day, that’s a different matter I think.

 

[damooster]

Hint: We don’t go to Mass to “chat” with Jesus. I "chat’ with our Lord at night when I’m in bed in my pajamas. No problem.

The Holy Sacrifice of the Mass on the Lord’s own day, that’s a different matter I think.

And we don’t go to job interviews to worship the Human Resources Manager.

My point was that I see people, wearing jeans and t-shirts, participating more deeply in Mass than I see a lot of people in suits. My sponsor wears jeans to Mass and he is the most reverent person I know.

 

[palmas85]

I personally wear dress pants and a collared shirt, but how does clothing material equate to reverence?

To elaborate, what if someone spends just as much time preparing their jeans and polo shirt as I do preparing my slacks and shirt? Is that not reverent enough? Pressing jeans is a lot more time consuming than pressing a pair of slacks is.

My personal opinion, and this is just my opinion, is that people spend so much time dressing up for Church as a sort of reminder that they are about to participate in something fantastic. But people can be just as reverent in a pair of jeans as they can in a pair of slacks.

And let me reverse your “what would you wear in front of the President question:” if I were the President, and I invited you to come over to the White House to chat, I would want you to dress in a matter that is comfortable for you so that more time can be spent on what we’re meeting about. In other words, I want you to come as you.

Not trying to be argumentative, just my opinions.

I notice that you did not answer the question. Not surprising actually because almost everyone knows what the answer would be. The question was what would you wear for a private audience with the Pope, a meeting with the President and to a job interview.

And I offered the opinion that going to meet Jesus Christ in the Blessed Sacrament is at least as important an event as these three examples.

Wouldn’t you agree?

And to respond yes, someone can be very reverent in jeans, robes or totally nude for that matter. The question is though why someone would object to dressing as nicely for Mass as for other important occasions.

It isn’t as much about reverence as it is showing respect for the dignity of who we are meeting and what we are doing while we are there.

I notice that you are in the RCIA Class of 2009. Welcome. I hope that your RCIA team taught you in an orthodox fashion and explained the faith to you correctly. Sad to say that many programs do not.

 

[damooster]

I notice that you did not answer the question. Not surprising actually because almost everyone knows what the answer would be. The question was what would you wear for a private audience with the Pope, a meeting with the President and to a job interview.

I did not answer this because it’s up to the individual meeting the President or Pope (unless there is a dress code in canon law that I don’t know about, I’m still new to the Church). I would personally wear my best, but who am I to tell someone what they should wear?

And I offered the opinion that going to meet Jesus Christ in the Blessed Sacrament is at least as important an event as these three examples.

Wouldn’t you agree?

Absolutely! But again, it’s up to the person unless there are specific, written rules. Now, I tried to find specific rules from my parish and diocese websites, and I found none. So, how can I tell someone how to dress when the parish does not even do so?

Again, not trying to be argumentative. I personally agree that dress should be appropriate for a place of worship. I just disagree with the notion that I should look at someone as being less reverent because they’re in jeans.

God bless you.

 

[palmas85]

I did not answer this because it’s up to the individual meeting the President or Pope (unless there is a dress code in canon law that I don’t know about, I’m still new to the Church). I would personally wear my best, but who am I to tell someone what they should wear?

Absolutely! But again, it’s up to the person unless there are specific, written rules. Now, I tried to find specific rules from my parish and diocese websites, and I found none. So, how can I tell someone how to dress when the parish does not even do so?

Again, not trying to be argumentative. I personally agree that dress should be appropriate for a place of worship. I just disagree with the notion that I should look at someone as being less reverent because they’re in jeans.

God bless you.

I never said nor implied there was less reverence. But if you would dress up to meet the President, to meet the Pope and to get a job, why not dress up to come face to face with Jesus Christ?

I find that to be a much more important event than any of the three examples that I have given and should be treated as such. And no, there are no laws or guidelines. It is all up to you how you choose to appear in front of Jesus Christ.

And I wasn’t asking about anyone else. I was asking about you.

 

[roselily]

Yeah lol. I live in a VERY warm climate but I still don’t wear shorts or tank tops to Mass. So during the summer, I really hate seeing the guys in the shorts and t-shirts. At least make an effort.

In fact I don’t like shorts, period. On men or women, but that may be more of a personal preference. I like the collar standard someone mentioned above. When men dress up or at least try to make the effort, it’s very nice.

True.

 

[damooster]

And no, there are no laws or guidelines. It is all up to you how you choose to appear in front of Jesus Christ.

That was my only point.

 

[palmas85]

That was my only point.

You are totally correct. It is up to you whether or not you have enough respect for Jesus Christ to dress in at least the same way as you would to meet an important human being.

That is a choice that you must make. If you are comfortable showing more respect to a human being than to Jesus Himself, then that is certainly your own concern.

And I notice that you still never answered the question.

Buts that’s OK. I really didn’t think that you would since you so deftly avoided it he first two times.

In any event, take it any way you want. I believe that God deserves my complete and total respect, devotion and love, much more than any human being and so, when I enter His house, I will dress appropriately, just as I always have. Not to impress anyone but to show Him that He is important and that I do have respect for Him, particularly in His house.

How you dress and others dress is totally up to you and them.

 

[damooster]

And I notice that you still never answered the question.

Buts that’s OK. I really didn’t think that you would since you so deftly avoided it he first two times.

My friend, I did answer your question after you pointed out that I did not. Please scroll above, and you’ll see that I said:

I did not answer this because it’s up to the individual meeting the President or Pope (unless there is a dress code in canon law that I don’t know about, I’m still new to the Church).** I would personally wear my best**, but who am I to tell someone what they should wear?

Perhaps you missed it the first time. No problem, it happens .

 

[benedictgal]

At the good suggestion of the user eichenb:

Since no one else has started this discussion, I thought that I might as well jump in.

Especially pertaining to attire during Mass, I think it is fair to say that the standard of dress for men has also decreased significantly.

I am interested in hearing suggestions/sources for standards of attire and what tradition to say about the behavior and dress of good, Catholic men?

(As an aside, I noticed that the Brooks Brothers clothing stores carry a variety of etiquette books for men. Has anybody picked one of these up or can your recommend a Catholic alternative?)

I realize that we should not be judgmental, but, I had to vent about something that I saw last night at the Cathedral’s vigil Mass. We had a Quincenera (young lady celebrating her 15th birthday). Her parents were escorting her down the aisle. Prior to Mass, I noted that her father still had on his zoot suit fedora on his head. He looked like an Hispanic Billy Ray Cirus (when he wears his Hannah Montana disguise). I asked the sacristan to tell the man to remove his hat. Nothing happened. The administrator, who saw him right before the entrance procession, said nothing. The man had the hat on for the entire Mass.

After Mass, I glared at the administrator and told him that he should have said something. He looked at me rather sheepishly. Had the original rector been there, I can assure you that the fedora would have been long gone. Men just do not have any respect for the Church anymore.

 

[damooster]

Men just do not have any respect for the Church anymore.

This is not a fair statement to make, and frankly, I’m offended.

 

[benedictgal]

This is not a fair statement to make, and frankly, I’m offended.

The same has also been said about women. Folks complain about the women and the spaghetti straps, mini skirts, tube tops, halter blouses and strapless dresses.

Men are not completely blameless in all of thsi and are just as bad. I have seen them walk in with shorts, flip-flops, expensive Cowboys football jersies, Spurs jersies (mind you, I love the Spurs, but, save the fandom for the game) and the hip-hop gear. If you are going to a Sean John concert, have at it, but not for the Mass. Down here, they also wear their hats and have to be reminded to remove them while they are in Church.

Remember, too, the parable that Jesus told about the king who had invited the entire town to his son’s wedding. When he went to greet the guests, he discovered that one of them did not have the proper garment on for the festivities. When he asked him what happened, the guest said nothing. The king promptly had him thrown out.

While you may dismiss appropriate attire as important, I would say that this, with all due respect, is the wrong approach to take. You dress up for a date, correct? I would imagine that if you were going out on that date you would at least get cleaned up and look your best. This is more than a date and more than meeting the President. This is your weekly meeting with the Lord. I am not talking vanity here, neither. My mother (and the nuns) taught me that we should always make the effort to go to Mass in our Sunday best.

There were a couple of times when I did go to Mass in warmups. I was recovering from the flu and the church was right next to the dorm so I literally ran inside to avoid the cold. It was also very cold that day. I wore my heavy coat over my warmups, but, I also wore a nice sweater to go with the pants. I was neat and clean.

 

[damooster]

The same has also been said about women. Folks complain about the women and the spaghetti straps, mini skirts, tube tops, halter blouses and strapless dresses.

I hate to sound so elementary, but two wrongs do not make a right. I never said anything like you’ve described and should not be blasted for something I did not do.

Men are not completely blameless in all of thsi and are just as bad. I have seen them walk in with shorts, flip-flops, expensive Cowboys football jersies, Spurs jersies (mind you, I love the Spurs, but, save the fandom for the game) and the hip-hop gear. If you are going to a Sean John concert, have at it, but not for the Mass. Down here, they also wear their hats and have to be reminded to remove them while they are in Church.

Not trying to be rude, but are you even an adult? I’ve never heard an adult use such sweeping generalizations! Would it be fair to lump all women in to one category in the same manner with which you categorize men? You complain about men doing it, yet you are quick to do it yourself. It’s appalling really.

While you may dismiss appropriate attire as important, I would say that this, with all due respect, is the wrong approach to take. You dress up for a date, correct? I would imagine that if you were going out on that date you would at least get cleaned up and look your best. This is more than a date and more than meeting the President. This is your weekly meeting with the Lord. I am not talking vanity here, neither. My mother (and the nuns) taught me that we should always make the effort to go to Mass in our Sunday best.

Once again someone completely misunderstands my point. My point was that I personally dress my best, but it is not my place to determine what others should wear if there is no written dress code from the parish or diocese.

There were a couple of times when I did go to Mass in warmups. I was recovering from the flu and the church was right next to the dorm so I literally ran inside to avoid the cold. It was also very cold that day. I wore my heavy coat over my warmups, but, I also wore a nice sweater to go with the pants. I was neat and clean.

How do you know others aren’t suffering from similar symptoms?