Protestants: Do you ever confess your sins to another person?

[Michael_Howard]

I would be interested in hearing from Protestants who confess their sins to another person on a fairly regular basis and what their experience has been in practicing confession to another individual. I’ll ask this as well: do any of you who are Protestant wish you had someone to confess your sins to? I’m hoping this will not turn into a theological arguement but an honest open discussion.

 

[Truthstalker]

I would be interested in hearing from Protestants who confess their sins to another person on a fairly regular basis and what their experience has been in practicing confession to another individual. I’ll ask this as well: do any of you who are Protestant wish you had someone to confess your sins to? I’m hoping this will not turn into a theological arguement but an honest open discussion.

Well, when I offend someone or sin against someone I often will confess what I did wrong and ask for forgiveness. In that sense I confess to my wife on a fairly regular basis…

The Westminster Confession of Faith actually encourages the confession of sins:

15 SECTION 6: AS every man is bound to make private confession of his sins to God, praying for the pardon thereof; upon which, and the forsaking of them, he shall find mercy;(so he that scandalizes his brother, or the Church of Christ, ought to be willing by private or public confession and sorrow for his sin, to declare his repentance to those that are offended; who are thereupon to be reconciled to him, and in love to receive him

So I confess sins to other people as well. I have to be wise about this, as some people are fools, and at other times it will only make the situation worse.

And there are things I have discussed with my pastor, such as recurrent problems or whatever that may not necessarily be sin or identifiable by type as much as an infirmity or disease or weakness rather than specifically something like “theft.” Guidance when I’ve done something stupid. My boss hears me confess things at work. Not necessarily sins, but mistakes. He’d rather hear about them than find out about them some other way.

 

[puzzleannie]

half our family is Methodist, and one of their classic practices is the leadership confessing to one another, and members confessing grave faults that have damaged the community to the congregation. don’t know if that is universal practice among various branches of that denomination, but that is how they do it in their churches in s. Ohio and KY. I regularly attended conferences in 2 large Texas Methodist churches which have posted announcements about meeting with the pastor for confession, and retreats for confession.

 

[Cat]

PromiseKeepers is an accountability organization for men. They practiced confession of sins to each other in their accountability groups.

Not sure if it’s still around?

Before Promisekeepers, a lot a evangelical Protestant churches that I was involved with encouraged “prayer partners” for women and “accountability partners” for men. (Men often have problems with porn and other addictive sins, and accountability to partners or groups helps them to stay “accountable” and pure.)

Confession of sins was encouraged to the “partners.”

I also think that the Christian 12-Steps groups encourage confession of sins, or at least, confession of falls off the wagon back into addiction.

 

[NonDenom]

I would be interested in hearing from Protestants who confess their sins to another person on a fairly regular basis and what their experience has been in practicing confession to another individual. I’ll ask this as well: do any of you who are Protestant wish you had someone to confess your sins to? I’m hoping this will not turn into a theological arguement but an honest open discussion.

Hi All
I do because Scripture says that I should.

James 5:16 Confess your faults one to another, and pray one for another, that ye may be healed. The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much.

Just because I ask for forgiveness from someone I’ve done wrong too doesn’t mean God has forgiven me.

1Jn 1:9 If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.

I believe that the reason we need to ask for forgiveness from others has two purposes,
1 To help hold us accountable, nobody likes to admit their wrong or that they have done wrong.
2 If we admit our wrong to the other person, they will be less likely to hold a grudge against us, thus not causing them to sin in ways such as anger, slander, or gossip etc.

 

[water]

That is a good thing to do to confess to one another.

Now, my question is if you confess to someone, and he/she does not forgive you, what happened to you and the sins that you have confessed?

 

[LCMS_No_More]

I would be interested in hearing from Protestants who confess their sins to another person on a fairly regular basis and what their experience has been in practicing confession to another individual. I’ll ask this as well: do any of you who are Protestant wish you had someone to confess your sins to? I’m hoping this will not turn into a theological arguement but an honest open discussion.

When I was a Lutheran, I would occasionally confess to my pastor who would proclaim absolution.

 

[Malcolm_McLean]

That is a good thing to do to confess to one another.

Now, my question is if you confess to someone, and he/she does not forgive you, what happened to you and the sins that you have confessed?

Then the sins are not forgiven. But this a problem for Catholics too. People do sometimes withhold forgiveness for sins, and not always just the direct victims. Somehow that situation must be resolved before both parties can enter Heaven.

 

[PC_Master]

Then the sins are not forgiven. But this a problem for Catholics too. People do sometimes withhold forgiveness for sins, and not always just the direct victims. Somehow that situation must be resolved before both parties can enter Heaven.

Do you mean to say that the sins are merely not forgiven by whomever you confessed them to, or do you also intend the implication that God, too, would withold forgiveness?

 

[Truthstalker]

Then the sins are not forgiven. But this a problem for Catholics too. People do sometimes withhold forgiveness for sins, and not always just the direct victims. Somehow that situation must be resolved before both parties can enter Heaven.

This is absurd. The only one who can really forgive sin against God is God. David said that he had sinned only against God even in his sin concerning Bathsheba. God will forgive you even if someone else won’t. Our being forgiven by God is dependent on God, not someone else. You could say that confessing to someone else is an act of penance or demonstration of being contrite or remorseful. There always is some unreasonable person who refuses to ever forgive anyone and resents everything. This is his problem, not mine, and I do not thnk God will prevent anyone from entering heaven because of such a person.

 

[water]

Then the sins are not forgiven. But this a problem for Catholics too. People do sometimes withhold forgiveness for sins, and not always just the direct victims. Somehow that situation must be resolved before both parties can enter Heaven.

No, this is not correct. Let’s suppose that I offended you and asked for your forgiveness. You did not agree to forgave me. I went to confess and told all about this, through the Catholic priest whom I confessed to, God would forgave me.

 

[Zooey]

Unfortunately, the practice of confession is far from universal in the Methodist Church. I suspect that it would be difficult for many people to find anyone to listen to confessions…which is really sad.
If we went back to the days when there was always a “Class Leader” for every 20 to 40 people, that was one of his jobs. My grandfather was Class Leader in my grandparents’ church for many years. It was a real responsibility, which he did not take lightly, because of the fact that he knew that it was not just a matter of “hearing” confessions; it was for him to advise & counsel folks in their spiritual walk…
We need more people who are willing to provide spiritual counsel these days. It would go a long way, IMHO, toward keeping folk from falling into the danger of thinking themselves either too good to need help from anyone, or–at the other extreme–to think they are too far gone to be helped.

 

[ALLFORHIM]

Then the sins are not forgiven. But this a problem for Catholics too. People do sometimes withhold forgiveness for sins, and not always just the direct victims. Somehow that situation must be resolved before both parties can enter Heaven.

If this were truly the case then every person that has ever come in contact with BIL will be going to hell because HE NEVER FORGIVES PEOPLE and ALWAYS HOLDS GRUDGES!!!

Scary thought

I confess my sins to whoever I wrong plus I go to God for forgiveness:thumbsup:

You know my dad and I had a horrible relationship and I tried to repair it before He died but he just didnt want to admit that he wronged me and I know I went about it all wrong. Well, he died before forgivenss on either end was given. What do you do with that!!!

My minister said that if I have truly forgiven him and confessed it to God then I am forgiven by God.

 

[DrPiano]

Hey All,

I’m a protestant (currently at least) and one of my frustrations is that I don’t have anyone that I can confess to - especially my “secret” sins (you know, the ones I do that only I know about). My church encourages the confession of sins in small groups, but I’ve never felt comfortable enough with the people in any small group that I’ve been a part of to confess many of the things I’ve done wrong. There always seems to be some pressure to make everyone think that you’re a good person.

The more I’ve come to learn about the Sacrament of Reconcilliation in the Catholic Church, the more I’ve longed for something similar. It’s one of the things that has moved me closer to possibly becoming Catholic.

 

[whowantsumadebo]

I’ve been involved in a College group of evangelicals and they’re really big on confession to one-another.
They do this thing where they branch off into pairs and confess everything they did or didn’t do and then ask for encouragement. It’s actually a very Catholic practice, but it’s just not to a Priest–it’s to a friend.
I confessed my sins to my evangelical friends, but I’d rather do it to my pastor because he’s actually trained on how to deal with personal failings.
But yes, this is part of the new evangelicalism.

 

[joemizzi]

I answer from a Protestant point of view.

Sin is primarily the breaking of God’s Law, but it also injures human relationships. Therefore the Bible directs us to confess our faults and to forgive one another. “Confess your trespasses to one another” (James 5:16). “And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you” (Ephesians 4:32).

Christ also wants the Christian community to deal with sin in the church, seeking reconciliation between the members and to disciple obstinate sinners (see Matthew 18:15-18).

The church is further instructed to forgive and receive back into fellowship the disciplined member if and when he repents (2 Corinthians 2:7). When a sinner repents, God forgives him, and therefore the church should also forgive and receive him back into the church community.

So yes, we confess our sins to the person or community against whom we sin, and ask for their forgiveness.

But for God’s forgiveness, we confess to God.

 

[Kitty_Chan]

Hey All,

I’m a protestant (currently at least) and one of my frustrations is that I don’t have anyone that I can confess to - especially my “secret” sins (you know, the ones I do that only I know about). My church encourages the confession of sins in small groups, but I’ve never felt comfortable enough with the people in any small group that I’ve been a part of to confess many of the things I’ve done wrong. There always seems to be some pressure to make everyone think that you’re a good person.

Then why dont you speak to the pastor privately?

Also, have you confessed at least to God? some say its a easy pass, but Ive found Him to not let it be. He may already know what it is, He just wants you to admit it, right?

ps joemizzi

Welcome to the boards and nicely worded!

 

[water]

Hey All,

I’m a protestant (currently at least) and one of my frustrations is that I don’t have anyone that I can confess to - especially my “secret” sins (you know, the ones I do that only I know about). My church encourages the confession of sins in small groups, but I’ve never felt comfortable enough with the people in any small group that I’ve been a part of to confess many of the things I’ve done wrong. There always seems to be some pressure to make everyone think that you’re a good person.

The more I’ve come to learn about the Sacrament of Reconcilliation in the Catholic Church, the more I’ve longed for something similar. It’s one of the things that has moved me closer to possibly becoming Catholic.

Awhile back when I wasn’t very serious about my faith, I was too afraid of confessing even to a priest. That was my huge mistake. I wanted to look good in people’s eyes, but in God’s eyes, I was a whole different person.

Thanks be to God - He keeps me closer to Him - I’ve found the Sacrament of Reconciliation in the Catholic Church is a great gift to help me become holy - I am not saying I am holy - I am saying the more I go to confess, the more sins I see in me. The more sins I see in me, the more I realize how much Jesus’ love for us. That is when I want to confess as often as possible. The sacrament has changed me within and made me less prideful.

 

[water]

The sacrament is more than just us confessing our sins to God - it is about God healing us and making us perfect.

 

[DrPiano]

Then why dont you speak to the pastor privately?

Also, have you confessed at least to God? some say its a easy pass, but Ive found Him to not let it be. He may already know what it is, He just wants you to admit it, right?

Yes, I’ve confessed to God - and I’m one of those who finds it “easy.” Too easy really. Its so easy to sin and then say “I’m really sorry, please forgive me and help me not to do it again” - and then go right back and do the very same thing.

As for confessing to a pastor - I’ve thought about that. I think there is one at my church who might be good at listening to it, but it just isn’t really encouraged all that much - so its easy to just let it slide and not bother. She seems so busy anyway, I don’t know if I could get an appointment with her. I keep telling myself I should (and that I should seek some spiritual direction from this person) but I just never get around to it.

However, I was more commenting on my personal experience that when confession has been at all encouraged, it hasn’t been very practical or “safe.”