Question for Muslims about Islamic modest dress

[Silyosha]

Hello. Recently, I began wondering about the practice of wearing the burqa. I know this isn’t even especially common in many Muslim societies, but regarding those where it is, or just the particular women who dress that way, here is my question: Say a woman who wears the burqa becomes engaged to a man. When is it appropriate for him to see her walking around at home in normal “home” clothes–only after marriage or anytime before that? Obviously when she first meets her future husband, he is only an aquaintance, but after they develop a closer relationship, at what point is wearing whatever clothing she wants to wear privately at home (within reason, obviously) in his presence, appropriate? Thanks and God bless! +

 

[koshakoji]

Since the women who wear the burqa/niqab usually fall within the extremist category, most of them would not allow their future husband to see them without their niqab on until after the nikah (marriage contract) has been signed.
In Islam, marriage is not a sacrament but instead a contract where the wife provides unlimited sexual access in return for food and shelter. Therefore, there usually is no “relationship” prior to marriage (at least in extremist circles).

 

[LongJohnSilver]

In Islam, marriage is not a sacrament but instead a contract where the wife provides unlimited sexual access in return for food and shelter.

Really? That’s remarkable. Can you give an online example of such a contract? It would be interesting to read…

 

[jakasaki]

Really? That’s remarkable. Can you give an online example of such a contract? It would be interesting to read…

In Islam, marriage is considered both a social agreement and a legal contract. In modern times, the marriage contract is signed in the presence of an Islamic judge, imam, or trusted community elder who is familiar with Islamic law. The process of signing the contract is usually a private affair, involving only the immediate families of the bride and groom.

Marriage Contract Conditions
Negotiating and signing the contract is a requirement of marriage under Islamic law, and certain conditions must be upheld in order for it to be binding and recognized.

More to read here:

islam.about.com/od/marriage/a/contract.htm

 

[jakasaki]

Hello. Recently, I began wondering about the practice of wearing the burqa. I know this isn’t even especially common in many Muslim societies, but regarding those where it is, or just the particular women who dress that way, here is my question: Say a woman who wears the burqa becomes engaged to a man. When is it appropriate for him to see her walking around at home in normal “home” clothes–only after marriage or anytime before that? Obviously when she first meets her future husband, he is only an aquaintance, but after they develop a closer relationship, at what point is wearing whatever clothing she wants to wear privately at home (within reason, obviously) in his presence, appropriate? Thanks and God bless! +

Wearing a burqa will identify you as a **muslim ** practicing under the religion of islam and not as a Catholic woman.

 

[elwill]

Hello. Recently, I began wondering about the practice of wearing the burqa. I know this isn’t even especially common in many Muslim societies, but regarding those where it is, or just the particular women who dress that way, here is my question: Say a woman who wears the burqa becomes engaged to a man. When is it appropriate for him to see her walking around at home in normal “home” clothes–only after marriage or anytime before that? Obviously when she first meets her future husband, he is only an aquaintance, but after they develop a closer relationship, at what point is wearing whatever clothing she wants to wear privately at home (within reason, obviously) in his presence, appropriate? Thanks and God bless! +

according to islam and aacording to practicing women , they can’t wear whatever clothing they wears privately at home for future husband unill the marriage
i mean that it dosn’t matter if she wear borqa or wear just Hjijab or even dosn’t wear both of them , still she can’t wear private home clothing ( which is un-modest) untill the marriage

as for those who wear borqa , the man can see her face untill he verifies from his emotions toward her before the proposal

 

[Silyosha]

according to islam and aacording to practicing women , they can’t wear whatever clothing they wears privately at home for future husband unill the marriage
i mean that it dosn’t matter if she wear borqa or wear just Hjijab or even dosn’t wear both of them , still she can’t wear private home clothing ( which is un-modest) untill the marriage

as for those who wear borqa , the man can see her face untill he verifies from his emotions toward her before the proposal

Okay, thanks for clearing that up for me! I thought that was probably the way it worked.

 

[John7]

according to islam and aacording to practicing women , they can’t wear whatever clothing they wears privately at home for future husband unill the marriage
i mean that it dosn’t matter if she wear borqa or wear just Hjijab or even dosn’t wear both of them , still she can’t wear private home clothing ( which is un-modest) untill the marriage

as for those who wear borqa , the man can see her face untill he verifies from his emotions toward her before the proposal

do these dress codes apply to 7-year old wives?

 

[Ashurie]

The head covering is not forced onto women, sure to Western society it might be the case. During my history essay on Islamophobia, I discovered that most views are given is from the media, and it actually untrue. The head covering worn by women is a modest covering, protecting them from the perverted eyes of many men, and it is also a covering to show they are modest.

Similar to women covering their hair and being modest in traditional Catholicism, right?

It is in the Qu’ran, were it says that women should cover themselves from the eyes of men.

The Burka (which is the full on face covering) is actually worn by a minority, and places like Afghanistan is forced on to women.

However, in Western society, many Islamic women do not wear the head-covering because of the racist remarks from those who do not understand. And many young women wear it, as a symbol of their ethno-religious background.

This is what I have learn, from my essay and from some Muslim friends I have, all of which where the head scarf - one is from Turkey and the other Indonesia.

 

[Silyosha]

Yes, I think there are huge simularities between traditional Catholic headwear and Muslim headwear (not burqas, but hijabs, etc). I think it’s sad and stomach-turning that we as Christians think it’s okay to make all these catty little remarks about our Muslim brothers and sisters just because of what one small group of extremists has done. I was just asking a question, directed to Muslims who know the answer; not opening up an opportunity to be uncharitable. Thank you.

 

[Ashurie]

So true so true, but in all honesty, can you expect our Muslim brothers and sisters to open up, when they are faced with such negativity? Personally I do not blame them really…but I have found they will open up, if you are genuinely interested in their faith and are polite. My Indonesian friend explained about the Muslim wash rooms we have a University, she told us what they are for and the Muslim practice behind it.

 

[Silyosha]

So true so true, but in all honesty, can you expect our Muslim brothers and sisters to open up, when they are faced with such negativity? Personally I do not blame them really…but I have found they will open up, if you are genuinely interested in their faith and are polite. My Indonesian friend explained about the Muslim wash rooms we have a University, she told us what they are for and the Muslim practice behind it.

I agree 100%. When I’m at school and I hear people ragging on Christians in general and Catholics in particular, the last thing I want to do is open up to others! Everyone, let’s just be polite and respectfully disagree where need be.

 

[elwill]

Okay, thanks for clearing that up for me! I thought that was probably the way it worked.

you are most wellcome

 

[John7]

I think it’s sad and stomach-turning

lighten up

that we as Christians think it’s okay to make all these catty little remarks about our Muslim brothers and sisters

I don’t

just because of what one small group of extremists has done.

if you’re commenting about post #8 then you have no clue what you’re talking about…Muhammad himself, you know the one who started Islam, had a 7year old wife, did she or didn’t she take part in the dress behavior, its a simple question

Marriage to Aisha
Main article: Aisha Marriage to Muhammad
Aisha was six years old when betrothed to Muhammad. She stayed in her parents’ home until the age of nine or ten, when the marriage was consummated in Medina.
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Muhammad%27s_wives

 

[elwill]

if you’re commenting about post #8 then you have no clue what you’re talking about…Muhammad himself, you know the one who started Islam, had a 7year old wife, did she or didn’t she take part in the dress behavior, its a simple question

i think that her comment was for Ashurie in the fact

as for responding to your question about Aaisha , i’m sure that she was one of the first women who obeyed the command of dress code when it was revealed to her husband , but what was her age in that time , i’m not sure

 

[Silyosha]

lighten up

I don’t

if you’re commenting about post #8 then you have no clue what you’re talking about…Muhammad himself, you know the one who started Islam, had a 7year old wife, did she or didn’t she take part in the dress behavior, its a simple question

Marriage to Aisha
Main article: Aisha Marriage to Muhammad
Aisha was six years old when betrothed to Muhammad. She stayed in her parents’ home until the age of nine or ten, when the marriage was consummated in Medina.
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Muhammad%27s_wives

I wasn’t talking about Aisha. I didn’t even mention her. My post had no indications of approval of wearing a burqa, or even of following Islam. As you can see, I am a Catholic; I do not agree with Islam, but I do agree with politeness to all. Mohammad may have done any number of terrible things–I’m not well-versed on the origins of Islam myself–that I have no knowledge about, and nevertheless, that doesn’t mean Muslims today need to be held responsible or treated as if they personally comitted those acts. I don’t really appreciate your rude tone.

 

[Ashurie]

if you’re commenting about post #8 then you have no clue what you’re talking about…Muhammad himself, you know the one who started Islam, had a 7year old wife, did she or didn’t she take part in the dress behavior, its a simple question

Mate, that happened over 1000 years ago, when marriages like this was allowed. In those days, girls were married at 13, as it was their best chance to survive child birth I am sure our dearest Mother, was not very old herself when she gave birth to the Lord. It was the norm back then and head covering and modest wear stems from Abrahamic religions, such as Judaism, Christianity and Islam…and would have been adopted from Judaism, as that is the likely source us Christians’ get it from, and also from our Mother.

And furthermore, if you are going to reference something do not use wiki…as it can be edited by everyone and anyone…no very reliable

 

[AngryAtheist8]

Yes, I think there are huge simularities between traditional Catholic headwear and Muslim headwear (not burqas, but hijabs, etc). I think it’s sad and stomach-turning that we as Christians think it’s okay to make all these catty little remarks about our Muslim brothers and sisters just because of what one small group of extremists has done. I was just asking a question, directed to Muslims who know the answer; not opening up an opportunity to be uncharitable. Thank you.

Its a significantly large percentage of the Muslim population unfortunately. Especially in places like Saudi Arabia.

Sharia law is no joke (unless your into gallows humor)

 

[Sister_Amy]

Actually…

A couple is supposed to see each other before they get married. There’s a difference of opinion regarding how much he is able to see of her–whether just her face, or what she shows in front of her family, for instance. But just once.

The couple doesn’t date, or live together, or even hang out alone really before they get married. When they get married she can wear in front of her husband whatever she likes. I know quite a few women who cover their faces in public (i.e., in mixed company), and they’re all quite quick to uncover their faces when just around women or won’t be seen by men. And I’m not sure how comfortable any woman would feel marrying a man who had never, ever seen her face.

But it is part of Islam that a couple is supposed to actually see each other before getting married–it will foster love and affection between them.

I hope that answers your question. I’ll try to stick around to answer any follow-ups.

 

[Silyosha]

Actually…

A couple is supposed to see each other before they get married. There’s a difference of opinion regarding how much he is able to see of her–whether just her face, or what she shows in front of her family, for instance. But just once.

The couple doesn’t date, or live together, or even hang out alone really before they get married. When they get married she can wear in front of her husband whatever she likes. I know quite a few women who cover their faces in public (i.e., in mixed company), and they’re all quite quick to uncover their faces when just around women or won’t be seen by men. And I’m not sure how comfortable any woman would feel marrying a man who had never, ever seen her face.

But it is part of Islam that a couple is supposed to actually see each other before getting married–it will foster love and affection between them.

I hope that answers your question. I’ll try to stick around to answer any follow-ups.

Thank you! This is the kind of response I was looking for. It makes sense, I suppose…I was kind of picturing how odd it would be for both the husband and wife after marriage if he had neverseen her face before.