Raising Kids Catholic

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Irishmom2 said:
Look, you need to lead by example. You sound like you are trying to be P.C. Pray that your wife has a conversion.
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I will. I appreciate that she’s very strong in her faith. I will pray she reads the right materials to understand why the Catholic faith is the faith founded by Christ.

That said, I pick my battles on what’s truly important and try to avoid the small issues. Baptism is the most important sacrament as it forgives sins and you receive the Holy Spirit for the first time.
 
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No, the question is more why she doesn’t believe the Catholic Church is the way…
 
Irishmom2 said:
So you are going to let them decide?
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Hopefully not. It’s my job as a parent to get them a Catholic religious education. As kids, they don’t understand the need for Christian instruction. And that would be a promise that I made when I got married.

It’s necessary to require what’s best for them.
 
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Irishmom2 said:
No, the question is more why she doesn’t believe the Catholic Church is the way…
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She doesn’t realize that mass is being in Heaven and that the homily/sermon is not the most important part of the mass. There have been a couple homilies that have touched her but they are just too few and far between.
 
Well, you really need to step up now and let your wife know where they will be going. The time to discuss this is now, not later.
 
edward_george1 said:
Yes. So you shouldn’t set your family up for division and confusion by letting their religious upbringing be bifurcated in this fashion.
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Glad I ran thru my thoughts thru the forum. It’s better than allowing my teaching of the faith to be disorganized. I might need to get some help with how to teach them the Catholic faith as well as to be the spiritual leader of the household, something my wife wants me to be.
Irishmom2 said:
Well, you really need to step up now and let your wife know where they will be going. The time to discuss this is now, not later.
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Yep, it can’t be solved simply be avoiding it.
 
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whichwaytogo47 said:
something my wife wants me to be.
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Not if she’s going to challenge that authority by insisting that the children be baptized so late and in her church. Talk to your priest, and talk to your wife about this. Sooner rather than later.

You didn’t really answer my question upthread: is your wife actually insisting on this, or are you speculating she will, and making decisions based on a fear of confrontation?
 
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Mass is being in heaven? No wonder she is confused. Please get some good books and watch some videos. Perhaps @(name removed by moderator) and @TheLittleLady can make some suggestions that will be helpful to you.
 
edward_george1 said:
Not if she’s going to challenge that authority by insisting that the children be baptized so late and in her church. Talk to your priest, and talk to your wife about this. Sooner rather than later.

You didn’t really answer my question upthread: is your wife actually insisting on this, or are you speculating she will, and making decisions based on a fear of confrontation?
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Her insistence is on getting them baptized as soon as they are a believer. She wants to raise them Christian (both Catholic and evangelical). This has been confirmed. But I don’t think I can get my kid into CCD until they’re baptized.

Thanks. I’ve got some learning to do.
 
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I meant some suggestions for reading, and of course, Fr. Mike Schmidt clips. 🙂
 
Not if it’s presented the correct way. We’ve had some lively discussions with our friends whom share these interfaith differences.

It’s so important to show where each faith is coming from - in my wife’s case why they believe in solo scriptura and faith alone and that sanctification comes from that faith and why Catholics believe in faith plus works of the Spirit as well as faith + tradition (aka the magisterium of the church).
 
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There will be several meetings. We’re not having kids for some time. It’s definitely difficult to discern between the Christian faiths, unless you have a solid grounding formed by the Holy Spirit on the Catholic faith. Some of the best ways to understand Catholicism have been retreats I’ve been on. They are the best at showing how important it is to have Jesus at the center of your life.

Thanks for your suggestions and thanks in advance for your prayers. It’s probably a couple of years before we’re going to have children.
 
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whichwaytogo47 said:
Not if it’s presented the correct way.
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Either you believe what the Catholic faith teaches or you don’t. There is no presenting to be done. Live your Catholic faith or you will not be teaching it to your children. You sound like you want to be inclusive and you need to lead.
 
Irishmom2 said:
Either you believe what the Catholic faith teaches or you don’t. There is no presenting to be done. Live your Catholic faith or you will not be teaching it to your children. You sound like you want to be inclusive and you need to lead.
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Why am I so bad at presenting the Catholic faith to my wife? Is it that I’m wishy washy and don’t want to hurt feelings - trying to be diplomatic rather than correct?

Why does her church continue to gain membership where the Catholic church in many areas have shrunk in size? I moved from an area that young people like me being in church was nearly non-existent to an area that has a vibrant youth community in the Catholic Church.

Again hugs for the advice so far. It can be easy to get confused, to want to please, and where you try to say that the Eucharist is the most important part of being a Catholic where the sacraments help guide and provide a foundation for your faith. Sometimes I feel that my wife gets by with 66 books and baptism better than a lot of Catholics get by on 6 out of 7 sacraments and 73 books.

How can I use the 73 books and 6 sacraments (assuming I never get Holy Orders) to have a better relationship with God? How do I pray daily (not just meals) so that I am a better example? I have a lot of ways to improve on my faith walk to be a better leader by example in my Catholic faith.
 
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The fact that you are asking those question makes me believe that yes, you want to spare her feelings, but perhaps you want to keep the peace more than anything. You need to learn more about Catholicism so you can lead her and someday, your children.

As to your second comment, I believe that the other churches continue to grow because some people don’t like rules. They go to church to feel good, hear the choir and listen to God’s word, and not have too many rules. The Catholic Church has lost people because they “don’t change with the times.” That is a good thing for many Catholics, but not for those that choose to leave.
 
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