RCIA. I think I did it wrong

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BadPizza

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New to the forums. Didn’t know where to go for first answers. TLDR at the bottom.

Almost three years ago our family entered the Church through RCIA. We had attended a RC parish pretty regularly, but never took communion. Made friends, got invited to RCIA, and the rest is history. All the people were great. Priest was awesome. However, looking back, it seems my RCIA experience was a bit “glossy” and avoided alot of the tough issues.

For illustration, I remember having a discussion with the Priest and not being fully on board with how mortal sin/confession works. I got a polite smile and a shrug. And it was just left there. Same thing with purgatory (of which many “theories” were discussed), Papal Infallibility, the Assumption, and some others. I was always encouraged to keep my eyes on the main message of salvation and the Eucharist. Details and understanding of other doctrine would eventually come later. Salvation and Eucharist were central, other issues were side issues.

So kept moving forward with that theory, but with doubt. In fact, even on the day we were accepted into the Church I was asking myself whether I should be going forward. But it was kind of too late. Wife was in, kids were in, didn’t want to disappoint anyone with my internal issues. So I just focused on the Eucharist and trusted.

After doing my own research on teachings, I eventually realized I don’t agree with quite a few. As soon as I realized where I was with that, I stopped taking Eucharist. I couldn’t be a liar or a pick and choose kind of Catholic. I haven’t taken Eucharist in over a year. Most of this is on me, I should have realized what was going on and pulled the brakes. But everyone was super nice and supportive, so I went with the flow. 100% my fault.

I have not gone to our Priest about it. We have a new one who is uber old-school strict. I don’t know how it would help. He might toss me out on my ear.

TLDR: Went through a nice RCIA with lots of cookies and nice people, not sure I discerned correctly. What do I do know?
 
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@(name removed by moderator), yes good advice, also may I add pray and seek the guidance of the Holy Spirit, who “will lead you to all Truth.” (John 16:13) 😀
 
Greetings BadPizza. Welcome to CAF
BadPizza said:
After doing my own research on teachings, I eventually realized I don’t agree with quite a few. As soon as I realized where I was with that, I stopped taking Eucharist. I couldn’t be a liar or a pick and choose kind of Catholic.
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Is it safe to say your belief in the Eucharist is everything the Catholic church says it is?

Peace!!!
 
Don’t be too hard on yourself! It’s hard to put on the brakes when those leading the program and sweetly sweeping you along and encouraging you not to worry about “the details.” You trusted them & didn’t worry!

I also don’t think you’re in such a dreadful place as you seem to fear. If you cannot understand all the Church’s teachings can you instead have faith that the Church is wiser than you and is mostly likely correct while it’s your understanding that needs to grow over time? That’s Faith! We can’t expect to full grasp the fullness of Church teaching immediately. And I don’t think we’re asked to. But if you can go at this with trust & humility vs a “prove it to me!” attitude… I think you are golden! “Lord, I believe! Help my unbelief,” we pray. Even the saints have prayed that.

When you can, go back to Communion. Jesus hs surely missed you!
 
BadPizza said:
I was always encouraged to keep my eyes on the main message of salvation and the Eucharist. Details and understanding of other doctrine would eventually come later. Salvation and Eucharist were central, other issues were side issues.
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This is what you were taught, this is what you said you believed. If you have changed your mind since, that does not mean the RCIA was handled incorrectly, by you or your teachers. Jesus is what is important, and they saw enough faith in Jesus to complete your initiation. That faith continues, I hope.

Everyone “doing their own research” discovers things they do not agree with. Rarely do they put any distance between you and your faith in Jesus. Instead they deepen your faith and strengthen your commitment to what is true. Sometimes further research will show you that you already hold the Church’s position. Sometimes it will show you do not believe with the Church. As has been said, talk to your priest and see if he thinks you do not have faith or hope. Do not just go by your own research, others may help you understand better.
 
BadPizza said:
… I don’t agree with quite a few …
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One does not have to understand, rather to assent to the teaching of the Church giving the assent of faith to issues of faith and normal assent to other magisterial teachings. Some of the most important teachings are mysteries.
 
For me, at the beginning and every decades later with some, assent means “I have a different opinion from the Church, however, I acknowledge that if either of us is wrong, I am the one in error.”
 
TheLittleLady said:
For me, at the beginning and every decades later with some, assent means “I have a different opinion from the Church, however, I acknowledge that if either of us is wrong, I am the one in error.”
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This is like with Galileo such that while he was not to hold or defend the heliocentric theory (which had no conclusive proof at the time) as truth, could conjecture it.
 
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That’s an area where I’m okay with understanding it as a mystery. I believe in the Eucharist, not in the way the Church understands it though. Not into the whole flesh thing, but it appears as bread and wine to me. If the Church says it is something else, fine. But to me its bread and wine with Jesus in there somehow. Not going to get too bent around the axle on that one.
 
Thanks for taking the time to read and reply. My predicament was that I don’t believe I was fully taught and more importantly, I didn’t fully discern. I had many doubts going in. I have not had the deepening faith experience you speak of. I wish I had. It’s kinda been the opposite.

I will talk with someone, but I understand this situation would have prevented had I been stronger in addressing my conscience instead of convenience. It’s something I’m trying to rectify now.

Thanks again.
 
Thanks to everyone. I think I need to do some talking with the man upstairs and some smarter folks than me in the Church. I definitely can’t assent to certain things, whether those are gamechangers or not I don’t know.

Just hoping I didn’t commit some heinous unforgivable sin by going along with the flow when I should have been listening to my protesting conscience. I.e…agreeing to enter the Church when I clearly wasn’t ready.
 
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BadPizza said:
Just hoping I didn’t commit some heinous unforgivable sin by going along with the flow when I should have been listening to my protesting conscience. I.e…agreeing to enter the Church when I clearly wasn’t ready.
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Not at all. God knows your heart even better than you do. He will assist and guide you on your journey to Him.
 
I am also a convert to the Church going through RCIA about 15 years ago and I can understand where you are coming from. You said you did research on the Church’s teachings that you don’t agree with. However, I’m wondering–did you read an apologetic view of WHY the Church teaches what she does on the individual doctrines or did you just read WHAT the Church teaches like in the Catechism? For me, whenever I had questions about individual teachings that were bothering me, I would come on here to Catholic Answers and read a few articles from various authors on the particular topic. Inevitably, I would conclude–“Yes, that makes sense!” I needed to learn why the Church teaches it. Maybe you’ve done this and still you don’t agree. But if not, I would start there. There are also a number of good books here at CA that explain the whys. Having said that, I will say that there are still a few things that I still struggle with but not enough to disturb my conscience. I guess I feel like John Henry Newman, another convert to the faith, that while there may always be difficulties with certain things, “Ten thousand difficulties do not make one doubt.” Hang in there, you’re in my prayers!
 
Well if you are still open to it I would concentrate on Authority. Everything derives from that, even the bible.
When examining any issue or situation, we must begin by being open to the truth and what is right.
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I would suggest a book called Jesus, Peter and the Keys: A Scriptural Handbook on the Papacy

As far as the Eucharist…just a reminder…those former disciples of Jesus in John 6 that no longer followed Him after His Bread of Life discourse knew exactly what He was saying.
 
Totally get your point on Eucharist and the Bread of Life discourse. I don’t understand how it works, just that it does.
 
Faith is a lifelong journey. A seed does not burst forth into a fully grown walnut tree. You received basic education.

Now, it’s your turn.

Read. Scripture, but also apologetic books which will help you understand. Words without explanation lead astray - which is why we have teachers. Listen to Catholic radio and podcasts. Dive into the pool. Of course, ask questions along the way.

However, if recurring doubts and intrusive or repetitive thoughts haunt you, it might be a cognitive difficulty rather than a crisis of faith. In that case, ask Father; ask doctor.

You are meant be experience a growing level of peace.
 
BadPizza said:
I don’t understand how it works, just that it does.
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None of us does. We accept it on faith.

You made a comment about the"flesh" thing; We believe Christ is sacramentally presnet, body, blood, soul and divinity in the Eucharist.

John 6 shows that some of his followers left him over the teaching; they could not understand it either, nor accept what he said on faith.

And the Apostles and those disciples who remained accepted it on faith.

FWIW, I would recommend, if you want to read a bit further on the matter, Brant Pitre’s book (or CD of DVD) Jesus and the Jewish Roots of the Eucharist. It is written for people like you and I.

Oh - and as to your comment about the older priest - you might find him very helpful. Nothing ventured, nothing gained.
 
let me try to help you brother

From the beginning, Christians understood Communion to be the real presence of Jesus, but from 1540 as people were drawn away from the church that Jesus built into a myriad of now 40,000 Protestant sects and they all started teaching different Gospels.

And they often fail to read Corinthians.The cup of blessing which we bless, is it not a participation in the blood of Christ? And the bread which we break, is it not a participation in the body of Christ? Because there is one bread, we who are many are one body, for we all partake of the one bread. 1 Cor. 10:16-17

For I received from the Lord what I also delivered to you, that the Lord Jesus on the night when he was betrayed took bread, and when he had given thanks, he broke it, and said, ‘This is my body which is for you. Do this in remembrance of me.’ In the same way also the cup, after supper, saying, ‘This cup is the new covenant in my blood. Do this, as often as you drink it, in remembrance of me.’ For as often as you eat this bread and drink the cup, you proclaim the Lord’s death until he comes. Whoever, therefore, eats the bread or drinks the cup of the Lord in an unworthy manner will be guilty of profaning the body and blood of the Lord. 1 Cor. 11:23-27
[ Also see John 6, and the Didache, Sts Clement, Ignatius, Justin Martyr, Cyprian, Athanasius etc.]
 
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