Receiving/not receiving Communion in a family

[gardenswithkids]

Young children don’t recieve Holy Communion, and therefore it’s perfectly normal for them. Teach your child that there are reasons for older children and adults not to receive Holy Communion. Explain that people need to prepare themselves for Communion through Confession and fasting.

We should assume the most charitable interpretation to other people’s behavior. Instead of assuming daddy sinned, your child may simple assume you ate too close to Mass. When our children are older, we can do that for them as well, while also making sure our children get opportunities for Confession on a regular basis.

 

[Zosimus41]

I just thought of this yesterday- some is more private- so It’s not easy to share but anyway what can you do.

So I don’t receive while I am in mortal sin. My wife knows that my main mortal sins are missing mass and masturbation- which I somtimes do really well with- going to longer periods not doing this- then I slip of course- this is human. My wife doesn’t give me any grief over this as she doesn’t even believe masturbation is really a sin- another matter entirely though. I know it is.

So when my wife knows I haven’t missed mass and then I don’t receive or say that I need to go to Confession before Communion she pretty much knows what has happened. But like I said; it’s no big deal now. She just sees this as my peculiarity, which is fine and not so related to my basic question in this thread.

But we have a kid (only 3 now) and as she grows and understands the nature of sin and the need to abstain from receiving while in sin- and she sees me not receive she is going to know I sinned seriously. She wont know anything about masturbation of course as, well, that’s inappropriate. But anyway what happens in families where one or the other doesn’t receive. It’s like everybody knows when someone has seriously sinned- and this just seems weird to me. I grew up in a household where everyone just received at every mass. I now know that this can be improper. Also knowing myself; it’s likely that I am going to be the only one not receiving some weeks at mass. I can’t always make it to confession because I can’t drive- have a visual impairment.

Wo what are other folks’ experiences with this issue of families knowing when one member or the other has sinned by them not receiving?

Ive been in your shoes my family mom dad sister and her kids my wife and kids on those days when we all go to mass together and I have a mortal sin and dont go to communion I wonder what they are thinking about me like are they thinking what did he do? My family are the typical catholics they heard somewhere your only required to go to confession once a year and as long as you meet that criteria your good. My wife and I know better.Yes Ive explained it to them but they dont listen.

I remember a time when about half the congregation would get up for communion and you would have to stumble past those who stay seated in the pew.Now everyone gets up to go to communion.

I just bite the perverbial bullet and do whats right.

Going to mass these days seeing people do whatever strikes their fancy… orans posture,holding hands,an army of extra ordinary Eucharistic ministers, female alter servers
(little girls dressed up like a priest makes my blood boil) Female Lectors Loud music
Everyone going to communion.

When we visit a parish and I see the crucifix headed towards the steps of sanctury with a ponytail swaying back and forth behind it I know its going to be a long painful mass for me to stomach. While I watch all this.

Give me a Latin Mass it brings peace to my soul that I take out into the world. When I first started going about a year ago I had no idea when I was supposed to kneel or sit and it didnt matter I just followed everyone else and I felt such a peace and its beautiful.

I learned the alter rail serves both as a barrior between earth and Heaven while allowing you to kneel so you can receive Christ. Its my understanding Vat II did not give instructions to rip out the alter rails to begin with but Im not sure on that.

 

[Mrs_Sally]

Ive been in your shoes my family mom dad sister and her kids my wife and kids on those days when we all go to mass together and I have a mortal sin and dont go to communion I wonder what they are thinking about me like are they thinking what did he do? My family are the typical catholics they heard somewhere your only required to go to confession once a year and as long as you meet that criteria your good. My wife and I know better.Yes Ive explained it to them but they dont listen.

I remember a time when about half the congregation would get up for communion and you would have to stumble past those who stay seated in the pew.Now everyone gets up to go to communion.

I just bite the perverbial bullet and do whats right.

Going to mass these days seeing people do whatever strikes their fancy… orans posture,holding hands,an army of extra ordinary Eucharistic ministers, female alter servers
(little girls dressed up like a priest makes my blood boil) Female Lectors Loud music
Everyone going to communion.

When we visit a parish and I see the crucifix headed towards the steps of sanctury with a ponytail swaying back and forth behind it I know its going to be a long painful mass for me to stomach. While I watch all this.

Give me a Latin Mass it brings peace to my soul that I take out into the world. When I first started going about a year ago I had no idea when I was supposed to kneel or sit and it didnt matter I just followed everyone else and I felt such a peace and its beautiful.

I learned the alter rail serves both as a barrior between earth and Heaven while allowing you to kneel so you can receive Christ. Its my understanding Vat II did not give instructions to rip out the alter rails to begin with but Im not sure on that.

It would be good for you to cultivate a spirit of detachment - both for what other people are thinking about you, and for what other people are doing during Mass (or outside of it).

Certainly we are allowed to have preferences and are blessed when the Mass we attend has those preferences. BUT, we need to be careful about being critical of other’s preferences. If the Mass includes things that are allowed we need to silence our inner critic.

 

[Zosimus41]

It would be good for you to cultivate a spirit of detachment - both for what other people are thinking about you, and for what other people are doing during Mass (or outside of it).

Certainly we are allowed to have preferences and are blessed when the Mass we attend has those preferences. BUT, we need to be careful about being critical of other’s preferences. If the Mass includes things that are allowed we need to silence our inner critic.

Thank you for your response and peace of Christ be with you.

My wife says the same thing you did and perhaps both of you are right. Its just that I believe people in general are stubborn to do things the way they want to and when I see these things the whole congregations involved it bothers me I feel like we are loosing our catholic identity.

I am catholic because I believe in the true presence of Jesus in the Eucharist. As in judgement when Jesus comes again and in receiving the Eucharist I am and will be on my knees on both occasions. This is our faith. When Jesus has his second comming are you going to put out your hand?.. or kneel in reverence and pay him homage? (not meant to be a question addressed to you but for all).

I just think we need to educate people so we can get back on track. Im worried that people dont listen.