Good post! I agree. Life is too vast and uncertain to try to go it alone. The Love of God is too vast for my inadequate human mind to comprehend, much less second-guess. Much arrogance is attached to the profession of atheism…I know, I used to be one. If I am wrong, I disappear into oblivion, if I, and God are right, I will enjoy an eternity of happiness with my Lord. Atheists are rolling the eternal dice.
I have to admit, I once knew a man full of compassion that was liked by just about everyone. He was sweet, sincere, honest, the love and caring in his eyes were unbelievable. And he was an atheist. I couldn’t believe it when he told me that. He said I was lucky I had an experience that caused me to change my beliefs, but he had not had anything like that. Yet, he also believed in psychics and most probably that type of spirituality. I prayed for him everyday, and when I remember him, I still pray for him. I think in time, he will (or possibly already has) convert. It doesn’t really matter if it’s to Catholicism or some other Christian denomination, if he just believes, God will lead him home.
It really is something when you start to believe, even if just a little, and at that point, your understanding starts to increase. When I didn’t believe, or didn’t care too much either way if there was a God or not, I obviously didn’t understand. I didnt’ understand the Bible and certainly didn’t understand or even agree with much of Catholicism. Even after my first “experience”, I didn’t understand and kind of pushed it aside and tried to forget about it. Then one day my mom told me to pray a chaplet. I threw the pamphlet aside, as I did to any religious book or item.
When I started having extreme difficulty in life and it seemed on the verge of falling apart, I figured “what would it hurt if I said a prayer?” So I decided to pick up that Chaplet my mom gave me and say it. It wasn’t too long afterwards I started understanding things I never could. It’s only gotten more intense since then. I don’t know what happened to me, but I’m glad it did. I have a much more profound sense of peace and order and no longer hate people (okay, I hate the way the world is going, but I don’t hate individuals, no matter how much they may get on my nerves or upset me.) And at times, not initiated by myself - times when I’m not expecting it - I have this wash of peace and contentment come over me. It doesn’t last long at all, but it’s definitley worth “feeling” (in a sense). When it happens, you don’t ever want it to leave you.
I guess you can say I’m a “recovering ex-Catholic”. Actually, does anyone happen to have an idea of what you would have called me when I wasn’t a practicing Catholic? I didn’t know if God existed and I really didn’t care if He did or not. I didn’t even want to think about anything religious. Perhaps it was a lukewarm Catholic? Or an agnostic? I can’t seem to find the term that classifies myself properly during that period of my life. Perhaps simply “secularist”…
