M
Mystical_Seeker
Guest
Even as I like to talk about how I’m not worried about the afterlife, according to most Catholics who say they speak the Church’s truth, I cannot be “assured of my own salvation.”
But based on my experience at risk management, and predicting the “useful life” of parts expected to last many years after it’s too late to find out, there are ways to put it into perspective. Mathematically, or at least a bit of arm waving helps me at times.
Well, what can I be assured of? If I’m reasonably sane, I have some idea what sorts of behavior I am likely to willfully participate in within the next five minutes. Or hour, day, week, or more.
For example, I bet my own lives and those of my loved ones, that I’m not about to spread gasoline around the house and torch it up, within the next five minutes. Sure maybe somebody will shoot an arrow through my head and I’ll run berserk and do that. So yes it’s possible. But likely? If it were more than a chance in 100 million according to anybody credible, I’d be locked up right now.
And I have experience at doing some really weird things for really weird motives so I can understand some pretty strange behavior.
Here’s another thing I’m not about to do. I’m not about to get a gun, go shoot people, and then yell that God hates me and I am joining Satan, and then shoot myself. Some think that anybody might “snap” at any time. Possible, yes. Likely? No.
Let’s say I’m not planning my life around it. Yes, an airplane might crash into the roof of my house and kill me before I press “Enter” another time, but if I actually think that is worthy of my constant attention – as in having greater awareness or vigilance will keep any stray planes away from my roof – then IMO I’m spending a lot of resources on a long shot, to the point I waste my life worrying about something that is possible yes but unlikely. But moreover outside my control except not to do anything to make myself a target like build my house right across the street from a runway.
So: how likely is it that I’m going to “mortally sin” within the next five minutes? Hour? Day? What does it take – full knowledge and consent? That means that within the next five minutes, am I likely to say to God on any issue, “I understand exactly what you want me to do God, but I refuse and accept damnation because I’m now taking my own path instead of the one I believe you want me on,” which is in my mind about what mortal sin really is like doing.
St. Teresa of Avila put it much more poetically. I can’t find it now but I’ll add it if I do.
So realistically, unless we’re in the midst of a faith crisis that is pretty strong and unpredictable, how many of us really envision ourselves going, “oops decided to willfully defy God today on something He really wants me to do.”
Yes I may be wrong in discerning His will or whatever, but am I going to intentionally turn away from him? Isn’t that the essence of mortal sin, that I have free will to choose, full knowledge to make an informed decision to go against God, and after all that, do it anyway?
Why is “mortal sin” such a scary day-to-day topic? It’s a very serious issue, but one that we have to always be looking for, like it’s hiding around the corner to catch us off-guard just in case we’re not watching?
All I’m asking is a perspective: except for scrupulosity or near cases of it, who actually lives in seemingly realistic fear of morally sinning any time soon, and then even after so doing dies before confessing? Faith crisis, you may not be able to answer confidently so I’m not trying to tweak anyone here but to share some ideas.
Is it like a fear that if I get shot then in my last few thoughts I think something sinful or blasphemous? To me that’s only a real threat if I’ve lived my life hiding all kinds of sinful junk that I have not addressed, which can be very burdensome and I maybe I’m answering my own question in part. It can be a scary thing because it’s the Worst Possible Thing. But how can my worrying about it help, in addition to having no desire to defy God? I suggest, maybe none.
MS
But based on my experience at risk management, and predicting the “useful life” of parts expected to last many years after it’s too late to find out, there are ways to put it into perspective. Mathematically, or at least a bit of arm waving helps me at times.
Well, what can I be assured of? If I’m reasonably sane, I have some idea what sorts of behavior I am likely to willfully participate in within the next five minutes. Or hour, day, week, or more.
For example, I bet my own lives and those of my loved ones, that I’m not about to spread gasoline around the house and torch it up, within the next five minutes. Sure maybe somebody will shoot an arrow through my head and I’ll run berserk and do that. So yes it’s possible. But likely? If it were more than a chance in 100 million according to anybody credible, I’d be locked up right now.
And I have experience at doing some really weird things for really weird motives so I can understand some pretty strange behavior.
Here’s another thing I’m not about to do. I’m not about to get a gun, go shoot people, and then yell that God hates me and I am joining Satan, and then shoot myself. Some think that anybody might “snap” at any time. Possible, yes. Likely? No.
Let’s say I’m not planning my life around it. Yes, an airplane might crash into the roof of my house and kill me before I press “Enter” another time, but if I actually think that is worthy of my constant attention – as in having greater awareness or vigilance will keep any stray planes away from my roof – then IMO I’m spending a lot of resources on a long shot, to the point I waste my life worrying about something that is possible yes but unlikely. But moreover outside my control except not to do anything to make myself a target like build my house right across the street from a runway.
So: how likely is it that I’m going to “mortally sin” within the next five minutes? Hour? Day? What does it take – full knowledge and consent? That means that within the next five minutes, am I likely to say to God on any issue, “I understand exactly what you want me to do God, but I refuse and accept damnation because I’m now taking my own path instead of the one I believe you want me on,” which is in my mind about what mortal sin really is like doing.
St. Teresa of Avila put it much more poetically. I can’t find it now but I’ll add it if I do.
So realistically, unless we’re in the midst of a faith crisis that is pretty strong and unpredictable, how many of us really envision ourselves going, “oops decided to willfully defy God today on something He really wants me to do.”
Yes I may be wrong in discerning His will or whatever, but am I going to intentionally turn away from him? Isn’t that the essence of mortal sin, that I have free will to choose, full knowledge to make an informed decision to go against God, and after all that, do it anyway?
Why is “mortal sin” such a scary day-to-day topic? It’s a very serious issue, but one that we have to always be looking for, like it’s hiding around the corner to catch us off-guard just in case we’re not watching?
All I’m asking is a perspective: except for scrupulosity or near cases of it, who actually lives in seemingly realistic fear of morally sinning any time soon, and then even after so doing dies before confessing? Faith crisis, you may not be able to answer confidently so I’m not trying to tweak anyone here but to share some ideas.
Is it like a fear that if I get shot then in my last few thoughts I think something sinful or blasphemous? To me that’s only a real threat if I’ve lived my life hiding all kinds of sinful junk that I have not addressed, which can be very burdensome and I maybe I’m answering my own question in part. It can be a scary thing because it’s the Worst Possible Thing. But how can my worrying about it help, in addition to having no desire to defy God? I suggest, maybe none.
MS
