Road block!

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joshvanrad

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I have been discerning for a while now and I’m kind of getting frustrated!

Before I even mention why I completely realize how selfish it is and I realize it is not an ordered attachment, but it still doesn’t make things any easier.

I don’t want to give up my possessions!
I don’t want to give up being loved by a woman!
I don’t want to have to go back to school!

Sometimes God frustrates me and he always just has to be right. Ugh.

God bless,
Joshua
 
Little_Mary said:
Huh?:confused:
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I believe Joshvanrad is just sharing some frustrations of his with discernement.

However, i will comment on your frustrations, Josh, as i have similar frustrations. I’m somewhat in the middle of discerning if God is calling me to Religious Life.

Only one of your frustrations listed here sounds reasonable. and that is not wanting to give up being loved by a woman. Giving up possessions is something everybody has to do at some point in their lives. And often more than once. When a man or woman gets married, they often have to give up certain things they own in order to fit into a new apartment, or to make their spouse happy (such as throwing away that old gaming system you enjoy playing so much, or old CD’s you just don’t listen to anymore, or clothing that you like but your spouse finds very ugly. Or whatever it might be 😛 Things of that nature…you know? We can all get by with having less clutter in our lives anyway, married or priest, and possessions are just inanimate objects. They dont mean a lot when you really get down to it. Don’t let it bother you to have to give up possessions if you think you’re called to be a priest. But of course, i don’t know what possessions you’re referring to. If you’re talking about a classic muscle car or an expensive mountain bike, or whatever…then i can understand the difficulty.

And having to go back to school isn’t as bad as you think it would be. I went to a two year college and did not enjoy my time there. but if discern that God is calling me to religious life, then i’ll probably be looking at some more schooling in all probability.

But my biggest road block at the moment is that i really would like to be married. And i struggle with lust from time to time, and i find myself very easily attracted to women. The thought of never having kids or a wife makes me very frustrated and angry sometimes.

I hear you, though.
 
In the garden at Gethsemane, our Lord essentially sweated bullets. He asked the Father three times to take the chalice form Him. His human nature was agonizing over the death He would soon suffer. Yet, after that time of fervent prayer and petition, see what He said to the eleven: “Rise, let us be going. See? By betrayer is at hand” He willingly rose to enter into torture and death for our sake.

The discernment process can be very much like this - agonizing, tormenting, emotionally draining. Just like our Lord went through for us. You do have a spiritual and discernment director don’t you?
 
Sorry I did not clarify.

The post is in regards to discernment of vocation. I feel a calling to the priesthood.
 
joshvanrad said:
Sorry I did not clarify.

The post is in regards to discernment of vocation. I feel a calling to the priesthood.
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If it is a discernment to diocesan priesthood then you can at least not worry about giving up all your things. There is no requirement to do that as a diocesan priest. That only happens if you are planning on entering certain religious Orders.

Maybe that can take one worry off your list 😉

Now buying good things on a diocesan priest salary, that might be difficult.
 
po18guy said:
The discernment process can be very much like this - agonizing, tormenting, emotionally draining. Just like our Lord went through for us. You do have a spiritual and discernment director don’t you?
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I have contact with the vocations director and my personal spiritual adviser.
 
Marauder said:
If it is a discernment to diocesan priesthood then you can at least not worry about giving up all your things. There is no requirement to do that as a diocesan priest. That only happens if you are planning on entering certain religious Orders.

Maybe that can take one worry off your list 😉

Now buying good things on a diocesan priest salary, that might be difficult.
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I have thought about that a lot lately and I have far too many things to keep as a diocesan priest.
 
joshvanrad said:
I have thought about that a lot lately and I have far too many things to keep as a diocesan priest.
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I don’t know how good I can be at giving advice on that since I am a Secular Franciscan and any attachment to goods isn’t good for us.

But you should not get to attached to any of your goods. All it takes is a simple fire in your house and all those goods are gone. If your entire world revolves around those things, then the fire will in effect destroy your world. You can’t take those goods with you when you die.

Think about it this way if you are becoming a diocesan priest. Can you take all the goods you own now and shrink them down to the equivalent of what you may have taken to college as an on campus resident? If you have more then that, moving parish to parish will be difficult. Don’t forget that you can almost guarantee you will be transferred several times. At least one transfer will almost always happen at the end of your first year as a priest. I have talked to priests that are getting ready to be transferred and they talk about having to trim down on things because they can’t really take it to their new location.
 
DaddyGirl said:
Perhaps all these feelings mean you are not meant to be a priest?
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This was my thought. Part of discernment is figuring out if you are even called. Just because you’ve thought about it and have contacted the vocations director, doesn’t mean the preiesthood is where God wants you.
 
joshvanrad said:
Perhaps. I am not the one in control here. I have just been going with what he has been giving me.
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All the feelings you are having are normal. It is just whether you can get past those feelings or not will be the ultimate determining factor.
 
What you are clinging to is your personal desires. From Matthew 16:24 and Luke 9:23, we see that we must deny ourselves (personal desires), take up our crosses (attachment to worldly things) daily, and only then are we to follow Jesus. How many times do we reverse this order?

As our Lord said: Matthew 19:29
And every one that hath left house, or brethren, or sisters, or father, or mother, or wife, or children, or lands for my name’s sake, shall receive an hundredfold, and shall possess life everlasting.

I would suggest that you speak with your parish Priest, or other Priests, who have gone through what you are now experiencing. It will make the path less lonely.
 
joshvanrad said:
Sorry I did not clarify.

The post is in regards to discernment of vocation. I feel a calling to the priesthood.
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Maybe you are just not ready…yet.

Try living as a priest…putting all you possessions to the side, maybe you can even live among them and talk about your struggles with them.
 
joshvanrad said:
Sorry I did not clarify.

The post is in regards to discernment of vocation. I feel a calling to the priesthood.
Click to expand...
I am praying for you Josh. I also am having some difficult times in my discernment to become a nun. But in the end God will lead you to your “happy place” with Him. And if He wants you to become a priest, then he will see it done. He will Guide you all the way! He won’t let you fall. sometimes the path gets rugged and you will feel like you are being steered to the smoothed perfect path, but stay on God’s path for you and it will be smoothed out in the end. when you have everything figured out and you will want to give up EVERYTHING for God.
God bless and Good luck in your discernement 🙂
~ Phoenix
 
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