Science and family:are there ANY good workplace conditions out there?!

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“And when it comes to infertility–you don’t even know (or shouldn’t if you have a fiancee and not husband) yet what your body may do. You’re guessing—and blaming stress.”

Sorry, but THIS is silly. You should know what your body do, no matter if you have sex or not. When you get sick and your doctor tells you “you need to therapy that, because you will be infertile soon and your kidneys don´t work” then this has nothing to do with the state of my relationship.
 
alice24 said:
“And when it comes to infertility–you don’t even know (or shouldn’t if you have a fiancee and not husband) yet what your body may do. You’re guessing—and blaming stress.”

Sorry, but THIS is silly. You should know what your body do, no matter if you have sex or not. When you get sick and your doctor tells you “you need to therapy that, because you will be infertile soon and your kidneys don´t work” then this has nothing to do with the state of my relationship.
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:roll_eyes:

That’s a kidney disorder, not a stress-related one. If your stress is so high it’s causing kidney damage then you need a psychologist.
 
Sorry, but you are not a doctor, aren´t you?

There are stress based diseases, and, as I wrote, stress made it worse, it is (probably) not the main cause.
Not every stress is based on mental disorders. I had to work by night often and to much in general, which caused physical stress alot, I care for a sister with cancer, which is not easy, and I don´t see why a therapist could make this better.
 
alice24 said:
Sorry, but you are not a doctor, aren´t you?

There are stress based diseases, and, as I wrote, stress made it worse, it is (probably) not the main cause.
Not every stress is based on mental disorders. I had to work by night often and to much in general, which caused physical stress alot, I care for a sister with cancer, which is not easy, and I don´t see why a therapist could make this better.
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I am not a doctor.

You are talking in circles.

You refuse to get a job more conducive to having a family.

You have huge struggles in your career and family life but you refuse to get mental help. Most professionals DO recommend psychological help for caregivers of ill people.

You simply want to “be happy”…which is even more reason for professional psychological help. Having a “mental disorder” is not the only reason to speak to a psycologist.
 
Have a friend who recently moved to Germany. She works in the civilian world, so, has exposure to Germany outside of a US Military base.

She went through some culture shock at the difference in the thinking and treatment from the medical community in Germany, so, I can imagine how our American lenses might distort things (she found it is difficult to buy OTC meds like Advil or a cold medicine). Talking to her she sees far more emphasis on stress and how it impacts one’s health, also more stress of natural treatments vs medications in Germany. Seems that there is more of a stigma associated with counseling than we see here in the US.

To the OP, advice we Americans give is going to be based on the system and established treatments we know here.

It is a good idea to look and see what the job market is going to be like 5 or 10 years down the road before you commit more time and money to what may be a useless degree. Could you maybe take your love of art and transform it into a degree in architecture?
 
This is interesting. In most cases, there are more prejudices than real experience, when it comes to america-images, too. And not only about america - my grandma in iran head a heart surgery twice and it was completely free for her. I mean, this is on of the last places I wantto live, but with better health conditions than here.

Well, I thought of this alot. One of the main benefits of the bachelor/master system here they propagated was the “abillity to combine academic fields former unconnected” but this is at most universities a lie. I can´t make a degree in achitecture, I would have to start a complete new study. I only can go for art history or with extra work a teacher exam, but no one here searches history teachers, there are more than enough workless young teachers with exactly this teaching field.
I was looking for a training as auctioneer, but there are no state organised trainings here (not as in austria, for example) and I got an internship at sotheby´s, but higher educational programs there are self payed. I am constantly looking for alternatives, I hope I´ll find a way.
My fiancé is in a later phase of his studies, he can´t start something new with 28 (nothing as a complete new educational way) without loosing years we need to pay for a family.
 
You may need to think outside the box with what you can do with your degree. My bachelors degrees are in English and Sociology. My masters degree is in criminal justice. I’m a business analyst for a bank (In the US, for the record). I started in a lower position where I got experience with fraud and worked my way up.

It’s not necessarily what I thought I would be doing but it’s a good job that I love with lots of stability and flexibility.
 
Yes, I think so, too. I fixed some meetings with different education centers this week and we will collect information from those different fields in the next weeks and decide then, Fiancé has contact with the local city council, the parish and works part time with the rangers in the forest. I try to collect more language certificates and hope to find something new.
 
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