Secretly Catholic

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Do you have access to formed.org?

When you get ready to talk to her (yes, you do need to tell her) ask her if she will watch this video with you first. It is about atheists and other non-believers coming home to the church. She may not have any frame of reference for why someone would even make this choice. The video might be a good way to jump start the conversation.

Convinced - Check out this great movie I discovered on FORMED. https://goo.gl/j2N8Fa
 
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Unless one of you travels extensively for work, is in the military, or for some other reason are in different places most of the time, I cannot fathom how one could hide the practice of their faith.

Do you just lie and say you are going to play golf when you go to Mass? Even on the tricky Holy Days of Obligation like Christmas that falls on Saturday/Monday.

When you don’t eat meat on the Friday’s of lent, maybe you just always decide to go out for fish that day or if you are a vegetarian that would help. The observance of Good Friday/Holy Saturday would be difficult to hide.

How do you propose to be an undercover Catholic?
 
I sound like a broken record, but, spend some time over at:


This will help you have a good, reasoned response to questions or accusations.

Trent Horn’s book “Why We’re Catholic” and Stark’s “Bearing False Witness” would be good to read.
 
Ok, I’m a cradle catholic recently come back to God. The only person who knows is my husband (non-practicing Catholic) and I absolutely needed his support in the early stages. I’ve lied to my family and friends about my whereabouts.

It comes down to 3 reasons:
  1. I don’t want to look silly/backwards. I would also get many many (admittedly funny) jokes from people.
  2. I don’t want to become a spokesperson for Catholicism. I don’t want to have to say/defend Church viewpoints during discussions about gay marriage, abortion etc. I also don’t want to be held to the church beliefs. I prefer people to think a certain way about me.
  3. I don’t want my religion to be thrown back in my face when I sin/ have a disagreement “yeah, you’re very Christ-like”…”do not judge others…” “remember the commandment…”
  4. I’m absolutely embarrassed to admit I seriously believe in God and love Jesus. Whilst I would never say that I didn’t believe in God if asked, I would be very vague about it (as most people are). I would probably make it into a joke.
I have spent a very long time cultivating a persona for myself and I don’t want other people’s perception of me to change.

And this is why I am a bad catholic…
I am going to have to do some serious talking to stop from going to the hot place 😉
 
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I can understand your point of view, especially for someone in the early stages. It is not really fair for someone just leaning about the faith to have be able to adequately defend it. That being said once someone has matured in their faith they should strive to become able to do so. I cant tell you how much deeper I have grown in my faith due to being forced to defend it. It gives me an opportunity to investigate and learn more so I can address someone questions about it. At some point a mature Christian should not be afraid to be open about their faith. Yes people may make jokes about it to you or attack you about it, but that’s part of the faith.

As our Lord said," If the world hates you, know that it has hated me before it hated you. If you were of the world, the world would love its own; but because you are not of the world, but I chose you out of the world, therefore the world hates you"

John 15:20
 
When I made the decision to convert, I was terrified to tell my elderly parents. Every week when I attended Mass I felt as though I was being dishonest with them and like Peter, I was denying Christ. The guilt I heaped on myself caused much anxiety. When I told them, I felt such a weight off my shoulders. Two years later, my mom still is upset about it, but I am so at peace. Blessings!
 
Latetotheparty said:
  1. I’m absolutely embarrassed to admit I seriously believe in God and love Jesus. . . .
    I have spent a very long time cultivating a persona for myself and I don’t want other people’s perception of me to change.
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I pray for you that you get over these feelings. Eventually you will be proud to admit you love Jesus, who after all chose to die in great pain for you. If this were a person in your life, how would you feel about acknowledging his sacrifice?

Yes, there are a lot of stereotypes about Christians, and there are some pretty awful Christians out there. But the Catholic Church has a two thousand year tradition of the greatest thinkers, artists and musicians in history. Anyone with any sense of history can’t help but be impressed by the Catholic church. It’s those who look at it from a narrow point of view, or from the perspective of all the sinners in the church like the child abusers, that have a problem.

Eventually you will want a new persona, I’m guessing that your persona isn’t saint-like, and our goal is to become saints.
God bless you in your journey.
 
One cannot offer advice without knowing why you are keeping this secret.
 
Epiphanius said:
Hi Viki63,

Thank you for your reply.

I’m not Catholic but I have told her that I’ve been thinking about converting and it has caused a bit of tension as she and her family are all atheists and fairly anti-Christian. I think she has accepted that it might happen and I think would work out but right now it’s just something we’re sort of avoiding talking about. We will definitely talk about it more, if and when I feel certain that I want to convert. Right now I’m just asking questions and trying to learn as much as I can. I was really asking from more of a “technical” point of view, for want of a better word! I absolutely hate the idea of going behind her back but it’s just something that pops in to my head every now and then.
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I am glad that you are being upfront about it. I think if you do decide to join the church that you should be upfront about your decision. Keep in mind, there is a possibility that she could see the changes in your life and follow you – eventually. There is a chance that she will leave you, also, down the road. I do think that you should be open and honest at every turn – she is your wife, afterall.
 
Not sure about sinful but this is not something you should keep from your spouse. The NFP issue has been mentioned. Also, since you believe that the Catholic Church is correct I assume you would like to teach your children that, or at least teach them to respect Catholic beliefs.
 
Epiphanius said:
Is it a sin to not tell your wife and family that you’ve converted to the Catholic faith. I understand that it is a sin to lie but if no one asks you directly is it a mortal sin to just not mention it? Of course, this is not at all in the spirit of the faith and I know Catholics are meant to spread the gospel. But isn’t it a matter of prudential judgement when and how one does that?

Thank
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Mark.8
[38] For whoever is ashamed of me and of my words in this adulterous and sinful generation, of him will the Son of man also be ashamed, when he comes in the glory of his Father with the holy angels

You have chosen WISELY to be a member of God’s One true Church and faith.

Learn it well enough to be able to explain it, share it and defend it; and live it PUBLICLY and Joyfully!

The bible passage is from JESUS,
Pray about it,

Patrick
 
You were convicted by the Holy spirit of the truth of the Catholic faith. Thus, your conscience was formed and you followed it. Dr. David Anders of the EWTN radio show “Called to Communion” teaches that a good way to approach parents regarding your conversion is that you followed your conscience. You might begin the conversation by asking if it is a good thing to violate your conscience. Betting they will say, “No.”

Let it drop if they ask no further, but bring conscience front and center once the subject is out in the open.
 
How did you convert?
Did you complete an adult class and get confirmed?. 1st Communion ? 1st confession?
 
A lady I was sponsoring into the Church, asked me if she had to tell her mom and if she did, there would be serious consecvenses for their relationship. My reply was that she is a grown woman and she tells who she wants. Regarding her mother I said that her husband should do the talking as he has been Catholic for many years now and is used to answering questions about the Catholic faith.
 
Bless you, I’m sure it is difficult having a strong desire to convert and living with your wife as an atheist. First, I will say you should talk to your local Catholic priest about this. Second, you are on the right track and do not let anything stop you from fulfilling your desire to be a part of the Catholic Church—we welcome you and your wife, and we love you both. I would pray sincerely about the way she receives your words. Whenever I have struggled wondering how someone would receive something I planned to tell them, I always have gone to Adoration and asked for the Blessed Mother’s intercession. It has NEVER failed me. I do not think this is something you should keep from her, as she is your wife. I do think that if she loves you and her heart is in the right place, everything will eventually be fine. Talk to your Catholic priest, and most importantly PRAY about this and her receptivity. God bless you, I will keep you in my prayers. Peace be with you.
 
what if i am overtly a catholic, but secretly a passive aggressive jerk online. that enjoys annoying people online, is it okay to keep that a secret ?
 
You might be interested in watching the life of St. Augustine. One of his well-known prayers is “our hearts are restless until they rest in thee”.
 
Pray for your wife, for her acceptance of your conversion, for her to come to see the light that you have seen.
 
Via con huevos, amigo.

And in case you don’t see the euphemism, it doesn’t really mean “Go with eggs”. It means “Go with balls”.

Be what you are. Openly. Regardless what that is.

An honest life is the best life.
 
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