Shaking Hands

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freudmacher

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Add your comments. You can also discuss the whole holding hands during the Our Father if you’d like.
 
I go to an OF Mass and the parish I go to does not have the hand shake and does not hold hands during the Lord’s Prayer.

I just switched to this parish from one that both were common. Near the end of my time there I was refusing the hand shakes and I never did the hand holding.
 
Just touched on this in the “Good things about the NO” thread.

I can’t stand the shaking hands thing. Especially since its right before Communion when we’re supposed to be focused on God, not ourselves.

Also, holding hands is distracting. I don’t get the point of it. In my years as a Protestant we only ever held hands if the pastor told us too, that way we all did so in unity and then the prayer began. During Mass, the hand holding doesn’t start until the prayer does and not everyone does it so its anything but a sign of unity, its just a nuisance. Same with people who do the motions like the priest. I find that wrong, since only the priest is supposed to do that. Plus, its just as distracting and brings attention to those who do it. Which is not what we should be doing since we’re supposed to be worshiping as a community in unity, not individually any way we’d like to make others look at us and think “ooh look at them praying so openly!” Those actions are very Protestant and attention seeking and so I don’t like them. Had I wanted everyone to be distracting and crazy during worship I’d have stayed Protestant.

Honestly, if these things would be banished from the Mass I might be willing to attend the NO again.
 
homewardbound said:
Just touched on this in the “Good things about the NO” thread.
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That was one reason I posted this. That thread was starting to go in the direction of the Shaking Hands thing. Plus, I didn’t know it was a bother to others until reading that.
 
I wouldn’t mind the “shaking of hands” at the Sign of Peace if people could remember to keep it to their immediate neighbors and maintain decorum, quietly saying “Peace be with you.” You wouldn’t really have to shake hands, you could just say the “PBWY.” I’d much prefer it to be moved to after the Confietor.
 
Neither the hand shaking nor the holding of hands are ideal, and both are innovations that can be done away with. Still, it’s not really that much of a problem. I shake hands and say “Peace be with you” quietly to those nearest me, and during the Our Father I simply clasp my hands and don’t give people a chance to grab them.
 
WanderAimlessly said:
I go to an OF Mass and the parish I go to does not have the hand shake and does not hold hands during the Lord’s Prayer.

I just switched to this parish from one that both were common. Near the end of my time there I was refusing the hand shakes and I never did the hand holding.
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Among about a zillion other things, this is one thing I truly love about Grotto. The hand shaking thing is always so disruptive to me. And call me picky - but I can’t stand coming back after receiving Holy Communion, kneeling down to pray, and smelling someone else’s perfume/cologne on my hands. 😛

~Liza
 
Wow. I’m very surprised by the negative comments.

Maybe you all would prefer to watch the mass on tv?
 
Joel_Tunnah said:
Wow. I’m very surprised by the negative comments.

Maybe you all would prefer to watch the mass on tv?
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Nope. I prefer to worship quietly and reverently with my brothers and sisters in the presence of Our Lord in Mass. Just because I don’t like socializing and signs if disunity and disruption at Church means I shouldn’t be there? I’m not against anyone else liking it or doing it, to each their own. But I don’t feel I should be forced to break my worship of God for other’s sake. I think, if it must be done, people should respect those who choose not to participate in it and leave them alone to reflect on God.
 
homewardbound said:
Nope. I prefer to worship quietly and reverently with my brothers and sisters in the presence of Our Lord in Mass. Just because I don’t like socializing and signs if disunity and disruption at Church means I shouldn’t be there? I’m not against anyone else liking it or doing it, to each their own. But I don’t feel I should be forced to break my worship of God for other’s sake. I think, if it must be done, people should respect those who choose not to participate in it and leave them alone to reflect on God.
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Well said. My thoughts exactly.
 
I often go to churches where the priest doesn’t tell us to shake our hands. I like that MUCH more. I don’t know…maybe it’s a nice symbol but I honestly don’t find much value in it. It’s just too artificial. Also I find it a bit distracting…especially when it turns into a ‘handshaking orgy’. 😛

As for holding hands…when I lived in S. America for a while I know that this was a big thing there. I found it highly annoying. Our Father shouldn’t turn into a prayer during which we concentrate on how sweaty the neighbor’s hands are or how we just saw him sneezing into his hands. Nothing says it should be introduced so we should conclude that it shouldn’t be done. Thanks God, no one is trying to grab my hands over here.
 
freudmacher said:
Add your comments. You can also discuss the whole holding hands during the Our Father if you’d like.
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The peace is given very respectfully in my church by bowing first to the altar and then to your neighbours. Ergo, I don’t mind it or find it an interruption.
 
homewardbound said:
Nope. I prefer to worship quietly and reverently with my brothers and sisters in the presence of Our Lord in Mass. Just because I don’t like socializing and signs if disunity and disruption at Church means I shouldn’t be there? I’m not against anyone else liking it or doing it, to each their own. But I don’t feel I should be forced to break my worship of God for other’s sake. I think, if it must be done, people should respect those who choose not to participate in it and leave them alone to reflect on God.
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AMEN!! I stand there with my hands clasped in prayer, my head bowed and my eyes closed so why did a fellow worshiper walk across the chapel to tap my arm to get me to hold her hand during the Lord’s prayer? How much clearer could I have been?
 
A bit off topic, but now that we are mentioning hand motions…I must include clapping during mass.
 
I was suprised to learn that the handshake at the sign of peace began in Europe in 1968. It began as part of the first “teen” Mass. Father Bugnini, the architect of the New Mass, has this in his book Reform of the Liturgy pg 428
“ At the same time [1968] a more specialized phenomenon, “ youth Masses,” came on the scene…the lively character of the celebration was impressive…from songs and music…from lively homilies…the voicing of spontaneous intentions during the prayer of the faithful; and finally, from the handclasp at the greeting of peace.” Footnote: “ All these things are now taken for granted…. Some people thought them a desecration.”
 
homewardbound said:
Nope. I prefer to worship quietly and reverently with my brothers and sisters in the presence of Our Lord in Mass. Just because I don’t like socializing and signs if disunity and disruption at Church means I shouldn’t be there? I’m not against anyone else liking it or doing it, to each their own. But I don’t feel I should be forced to break my worship of God for other’s sake. I think, if it must be done, people should respect those who choose not to participate in it and leave them alone to reflect on God.
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:clapping: :amen: :clapping:
could not of said it better myself!
 
If this is meant as the Kiss of Peace, it should be an embrace, not merely handshaking.
 
I like the hand shaking, but I agree that some overdo it. Its the placement that makes it disruptive, I think. What about moving it so that its not stuck between the Eucharistic prayer and Communion? For those that don’t care for it, would you like it better if it were at the very end of the Introductory Rite? It might make more sense, we arrive, express sorrow for our sins, give glory to God, offer peace to one another, then listen to the Word. Seems to fit in there better.

As for the hand holding - I am mixed on this one. I like holding hands with my family. I don’t have a problem holding hands with others, and it can be done quiety and solemly with disrupting the prayerful attitude. But it can get out of hand, also. I would prefer to limit it to within families, but I don’t see a practical way to do that.
 
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