Should I go to Disneyland with a friend who likes molesting people?

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starrygirl

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I have a friend who have unfortunately developed a habit of doing dirty things. Such as glancing at your chest constantly and then smiling to herself. When my friend went out with her once, my friend said she keeps on touching her.

Should I go to Disneyland alone with this friend? She’s also a girl, so would giving her the opportunity to touch me wrong?
 
starrygirl said:
I have a friend who have unfortunately developed a habit of doing dirty things. Such as glancing at your chest constantly and then smiling to herself. When my friend went out with her once, my friend said she keeps on touching her.

Should I go to Disneyland alone with this friend? She’s also a girl, so would giving her the opportunity to touch me wrong?
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Ask her what she would do. I do not think you can go (you are doubting) unless you clear things out.

Maybe you will help her. Maybe no one told her anything…
 
starrygirl said:
I have a friend who have unfortunately developed a habit of doing dirty things. Such as glancing at your chest constantly and then smiling to herself. When my friend went out with her once, my friend said she keeps on touching her.

Should I go to Disneyland alone with this friend? She’s also a girl, so would giving her the opportunity to touch me wrong?
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Would you go with a man who did exactly the same things? Would you in fact have anything to do with such a man?

The fact that this particular ogler is a girl is no different.
 
starrygirl said:
I have a friend who have unfortunately developed a habit of doing dirty things. Such as glancing at your chest constantly and then smiling to herself. When my friend went out with her once, my friend said she keeps on touching her.

Should I go to Disneyland alone with this friend? She’s also a girl, so would giving her the opportunity to touch me wrong?
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Why would you even consider going anywhere with someone like that?
 
Before she developed this habit, we went to Disnand quite a few times alone and she never did that. It’s our favourite activity in summer. But then she started doing this kind of stuff.

But how can I decline her?
 
starrygirl said:
Before she developed this habit, we went to Disnand quite a few times alone and she never did that. It’s our favourite activity in summer. But then she started doing this kind of stuff.

But how can I decline her?
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Tell her “No, I’m not going to go with you.” Simple as that. If she asks why, tell her why!

You have every right to not go with her if you don’t want to. Even if there wasn’t any reason, you are under no obligation to go anywhere or do anything with her that you don’t want to!
 
Take BJJ (brazilian Jiu-jitsu)classes and threaten to choke her unconsciuous or snap her arm if you catch her doing anything off-limits. You owe that to yourself and to other potential victims. I can sense right away that you’re a person of integrity (you’ll have to look that one up, I guess).
 
Ya know----I can’t even believe some of the questions people are asking on the forums and this is a good example of one of them.

Do you honestly feel like you need a resounding “NO” from everyone to convince yourself that this person is out of line.

Why would you even allow yourself to be in such a situation ?

You don’t just automatically feel/think this is weird and inappropriate behavior?

You can’t answer this for yourself ?🤷
 
Call me naive, but I really thought nothing will happen, after all the times we have been going there together alone. My friend said she has gotten used to it and they still go out shopping together. What makes it so hard to decide is that I really like her as a person and so I thought maybe it’ll be like the past times.

Yes, I know I lack confidence in my own judgement. But for me, while I am making decisions, I need reassurance that mine is the correct one.

I do appreciate all the advice given to me.
 
starrygirl said:
Call me naive, but I really thought nothing will happen, after all the times we have been going there together alone. **My friend said she has gotten used to it **and they still go out shopping together. What makes it so hard to decide is that I really like her as a person and so I thought maybe it’ll be like the past times.

Yes, I know I lack confidence in my own judgement. But for me, while I am making decisions, I need reassurance that mine is the correct one.

I do appreciate all the advice given to me.
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Translation of the bolded: “…she got use to being treat like an [sex] object instead of a person…” You owe it to your friend to tell her to snap out of it and stop letting herself be treated this way. The friend who is doing the inappropriate toucing needs to be confronted in a lovnig manner about the inappropriatenes of the behavior. There may be an underlying cause to this new behavior she is exhibiting that needs to be addressed. Why is she doing it? What sense of satisfaction is she getting out of doing this? Has something changed/happened recently to spark this inappropriateness? You are all friends…you should be able to talk this out with one another in a friendly manner and correct this behavior.

If the one friend will not cease the behavior…well…she’s not really much of a friend is she?
 
Personally, I wouldn’t even want to be friends with such a person, let alone go somewhere alone with her.
 
Robertanthony said:
Take BJJ (brazilian Jiu-jitsu)classes and threaten to choke her unconsciuous or snap her arm if you catch her doing anything off-limits. You owe that to yourself and to other potential victims. I can sense right away that you’re a person of integrity (you’ll have to look that one up, I guess).
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Ah yes, Islam the religion of peace. Oh wait, this is a catholic board. Never mind.
 
starrygirl said:
I have a friend who have unfortunately developed a habit of doing dirty things. Such as glancing at your chest constantly and then smiling to herself. When my friend went out with her once, my friend said she keeps on touching her.

Should I go to Disneyland alone with this friend? She’s also a girl, so would giving her the opportunity to touch me wrong?
Click to expand...
I don’t think you would be asking the question if you felt comfortable with her. It sounds to me like she is accustomed to violating other people’s boundaries. You don’t need to go with her, and you don’t need to tell her why.

If you do want to tell her why as a friend, then you may do so, of course.
 
horselvr said:
Ya know----I can’t even believe some of the questions people are asking on the forums and this is a good example of one of them.

Do you honestly feel like you need a resounding “NO” from everyone to convince yourself that this person is out of line.

Why would you even allow yourself to be in such a situation ?

You don’t just automatically feel/think this is weird and inappropriate behavior?

You can’t answer this for yourself ?🤷
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I could be totally wrong, but the OP sounds like a teen who has received little or no parental/moral guidance. Perhaps she doesn’t have anywhere else to go for moral advice?
We should be as charitable as possible.
 
starrygirl said:
I have a friend who have unfortunately developed a habit of doing dirty things. Such as glancing at your chest constantly and then smiling to herself. When my friend went out with her once, my friend said she keeps on touching her.

Should I go to Disneyland alone with this friend? She’s also a girl, so would giving her the opportunity to touch me wrong?
Click to expand...
No you should not go to disneyland with her.

Yes it would be wrong for at least one if not possibly two reasons
  1. If you might get pleasure out of her touching you then it is an occasion of sin (which you did NOT seem to imply)
  2. If she cant keep her hands to herself than by giving her close access to you you are scandalizing her weakness, thus helping her commit sins.
Pray for her and be kind but never the less refuse the invitation.
 
Holly3278 said:
Personally, I wouldn’t even want to be friends with such a person, let alone go somewhere alone with her.
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Pretty much. Why would you be friends with someone who makes you uncomfortable? I don’t know if this girl is genuinely creepy and perhaps malicious or just unaware that her behavior is inappropriate. Maybe someone should bring up this topic with her. If these characteristics developed suddenly, then maybe something happened to her to cause a change in her behavior. She might need some type of help. If she’s an otherwise good friend and person, then I think maybe you or another friend should ask her why she is doing this and let her know that it makes some people uncomfortable. If she’s a worthwhile friend, she’ll be alarmed to know this and be thankful that you brought it to her attention.
 
I have known her for 3 years. She just developed this habit half a year ago, after we became friends. She had been generally humorous and a fun person to be around, less so now.

I do want to help her, by what my friends told me she had been reading porn.

I know this question sounds pathetic but I really am a teen with some peer influence that made me feel going there alone with her is not a big deal. I am sure now, I will not go with her and I do hope I can find a way to help her.
 
My friend invited me to go to Disneyland and she also invited that friend I had been talking about.

I think it is fine to go as she promised not to do anything to me and she looked pretty serious when she said so. I have also asked my other friend who said she has been touching people a lot less lately and from what I have observed, she haven’t ogled me in moment that I had expected her to when I chatted with her recently. She didn’t ogle me at all, in fact, and her eyes are not as dark as before. She has those dark looks whenever she thinks something dirty. Perhaps after a lot of our friends repeatedly shown they are tired of her behaviour, she has changed. Her behavior seemed to have gotten back to normal.

So, I think it is fine to go.
 
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