SIlence before Mass

[anniemart]

Quote: “Your notions about Mass, I gather, are influenced by some of the unfortunate ways in which the liturgy has been manipulated in the name of reform so as to lose its central meaning. We have, in too many places, become a community turned inward, glaring upon ourselves. Our “worship spaces” are theaters in-the-round. We no longer look beyond ourselves to He who is to come; the King of kings, Lord and Judge of all.”

Conciliar,
What a thoughtful message you’ve posted. From time to time I come across postings that just say so much whether in several words or with just a few. This is one of them. There are other postings here (Paramedic Girl,Donna, Pray4Peaace, etc.) that tug at my heart’s strings.

I agree with you all and believe that mass is about worshiping Our King before anything else. I picture Him sitting there on His throne waiting with anticipation to see all His children. When there are people talking about everything else BUT Him, it makes me very sad. I wonder why others don’t feel the same. As such, we should lead by example. If most of us could stay silent in prayer then those speaking would have no choice but to notice the silence and do the same.

I understand Cat’s POV. Mass is the opportunity once a week for most of us, to come together as a community of saints. I think it’s very important and necessary to build fellowship and kinship with our Brothers and Sisters…but it should be encouraged to take place outside of the church either before or after mass. I think this is when it actually takes more effort and our time to do so, hence making it a true act of charity.

I will print this entire thread for my “church lady” collection. (My kids call me the church lady because I have this large flowered tote bag full of prayer cards, booklets, etc. Just really great reading material).

God Blesses us all every moment of every hour of every day.

 

[airforcemom]

In my small Louisiana church no one talks before or after Mass inside the church and if someone has to it is a whisper and as short as possible. Also, no one leaves before the priest has gone outside and everyone kneels afterward for some private prayer. How I miss my church - can’t wait until it is renovated – just hope when it is ready to reopen most of the parishioners have finished renovating their homes.

 

[Cat]

Quote:I picture Him sitting there on His throne waiting with anticipation to see all His children. When there are people talking about everything else BUT Him, it makes me very sad. I wonder why others don’t feel the same.

You ask why others don’t feel the same?

According to the Bible, we should do everything to the glory of God.

Everything.

“Everything” includes short and hospitable greetings to each other before or after Mass.

E.g.,

“Hello, how was your surgery? Glad you’re back at Mass.”

“Oh, your new baby is so beautiful. ongratulations!”

“Hey, I appreciated your pro-life letter to the Editor. Good job!”

“So what time is your concert at school? I’d like to come see you sing.”

These loving, hospitable greetings and expressions of Christian love are NOT a failure to talk about Jesus. We are the Body of Christ. HE is interested in our human lives and wants to be included in everything we do.

Anniemart, you wonder why others don’t feel the same as you do? In my case, it’s because I think it’s very important for our parishes to be friendly and welcoming, and I think the ideal time to do this is before and after the Mass because THAT’S when people are actually there. I know from experience that it is extremely difficult to get Catholics or any Christians to come to a “social time” outside of church.

BTW, our priests kneel and pray in the sanctuary before Mass. Then they get up and greet various people in the pews. No long conversations, no loud exclamations or excessive noise. Just friendly, loving words of welcome.

And for those who question the orthodoxy of our diocese:

rockforddiocese.org/

Our diocese and our Bishop are considered among the most conservative in the U.S. You won’t see “clown masses” or “liturgical dancing” in our diocese, and you CAN attend several TLMs in our diocese. The NO Masses are conducted with liturgical correctness and reverence, and abuses are dealth with (I’ve seen it happen in minor abuses–a priest adding an extra prayer, etc.) Our Bishop is not to be messed with.

But he seems to have no objection to Christians expressing love and concern for each other BEFORE and AFTER Mass. Many of our churches don’t have the architecture to allow for any kind of fellowship outside of the sanctuary, and our Midwestern winters make it tough to converse outside.

I would not say that our churches are “noisy” before Mass. There is a hush throughout the church, and the short greetings are usually done in quiet whisper. No one yaks about the Bears and the Packers, no one giggles or snorts or guffaws.

But there is freedom in the parishes to just say Hi, how are you.

I am…blown away…to see that many of you consider this “irreverent.” Wow. I am truly glad that I live where I live, because I don’t think I would have become Catholic if no one ever spoke to me in Church. I’ve talked to a lot of Protestants who think that Catholic Churches are cold and unfriendly. I tried to tell them that this isn’t true because I was thinking of the friendly churches in my diocese. Now I know what churches these Protestants visited.

I realize that many of you are very friendly outside of Mass and are involved in fellowship and activities with your friends in your parish. But don’t you understand? A visitor, especially a Protestant, to your church, does not SEE your friendliness outside of church because he/she is not part of your fellowship groups. The only chance he/she has to see Christian love is before and after the Mass!

Yes, I know, the Protestant will see JESUS in the Blessed Sacrament and THAT is all they need to see. But that’s not what Jesus said! He said that non-believers will know that we are Christians by our LOVE for each other!

May I please issue a challenge for those of you who want silence before and/or after Mass? Arrive at the Mass very early, and wait outside of your church. When you see a stranger, someone you don’t know, please speak to that person. Greet them in a friendly way, and ask them if they are regular attendees at your parish. If they are, tell them you are glad to finally meet them. If they are visitors, then please invite them to some kind of gathering where you can get to know them better.

After the Mass, after you have enjoyed your silent prayer before the Lord, run out into the parking lot and if anyone is still around (doubtful), greet them, especially if they are strangers to you. Do the same as above–ask them if they are members of the parish, and invite them to a gathering where you can get to know them better.

 

[anniemart]

I’m sorry Cat but I am not a member of any social groups outside of mass. Don’t seem to fit into their click. I’m also sorry if you mistook my post for your being a “loud” or disruptive person. I never said that you were writing nonsense either. You make many good points here.

I will take you up on your challenge and then I’ll let you know how well I succeeded. And it will be a challenge to me because I’m ususally not that early and most people tend to speed away to their cars and out of the parking lot for fear of being made conversation with ** after **mass (at least that’s what it looks like to me.)

 

[Conciliar]

May I please issue a challenge for those of you who want silence before and/or after Mass? Arrive at the Mass very early, and wait outside of your church. When you see a stranger, someone you don’t know, please speak to that person. Greet them in a friendly way, and ask them if they are regular attendees at your parish. If they are, tell them you are glad to finally meet them. If they are visitors, then please invite them to some kind of gathering where you can get to know them better.

After the Mass, after you have enjoyed your silent prayer before the Lord, run out into the parking lot and if anyone is still around (doubtful), greet them,

Cat,

No doubt you mean well, but you have thus far been insisting it is Christian kindness to chat and disregard the fact that others are preparing for Mass.

How about following your own advice. If you did, and limited your socializing to the “gathering space” outside of the church proper, there would be no issue.

According to the Bible, we should do everything to the glory of God.

Everything.

“Everything” includes short and hospitable greetings to each other before or after Mass.

Everything is OK, as long as we cover it with, “It’s for the glory of God?” That’s just silly. How about regard for time and place, not to mention those around you?

In this discussion, you have totally discounted the solitude that those preparing for Mass, or offering prayers of thanksgiving for Mass, deserve. Why do you think that is OK? Where is your love for these people? They are not the enemy.

The truth is, you can show kindness to everyone, Cat. Follow your own advice by meeting and greeting others outside. It’s actually pretty simple.

 

[airforcemom]

Our usher is always outside church and greets everyone - old and new - our priests before Katrina always asked if anyone was visiting at the beginning of mass and since we are so small we all knew if someone was new. We never let a visitor or newcomer unacknowledged and we still maintain quiet before and after because we feel the presence of the Lord and Holy Spirit in our little church and have had visitors comment on that. Most of us grew up with our parents and priest telling us the Lord is present in Tabernacle and deserves our respect and prayer when we enter His House. Our weather being in the south is usually okay for outside visiting except during hurricanes. The church I’m attending now further north in another state from my hometown people talk loudly before and after and they also stay afterwards sometimes just 2 or 3 feet from the door so it is hard to exit even 10-15 minutes after the mass is over so they do take lots of time for socializing but none have talked to me either before or after - I only know a few people with the church because I went on outing with the Seniors to visit some other churches in the area and have continued joining them for their Mass & Bingo every other week but they go on Saturday and I go on Sunday, so I can’t say that talking churches are any friendlier than quiet churches.

 

[Holland]

Someone told me that their solution to this is to meditate on Jesus carrying His cross to Calvary with the centurions and the persecutors jeering and shouting at Him, making all kinds of noise, and how Jesus was able to keep his mind focused on His Heavenly Father, and how he was able to fulfill His will, even with all the distractions and insults.

Ever since I heard that, it has been easier to block out the dull roar that is predominant in our Churches today.

This is good and I will try it. At this point, I would settle for 5 minutes of quiet before Mass. Last week I had an older couple conversing with a younger couple all through Mass. One of the kids with them had a catalog and was picking out shoes for school. I wish I could do better at blocking this kind of thing out.

 

[Lepanto]

cats touch noses, dogs sniff butts, whales “sing”

But they don’t do that in church.

 

[Apryl]

Find interior quiet.

There is nothing evil about people loving each other. Friendly chat is a way to get to know each other, and this leads to friendship and love, which leades to the world knowing that we are Christians, which leads to knowledge of Jesus and His Church.

I agree that the chatter would be best carried out in the parking lot for the sake of those who long for peace and quiet in this noisy world. But we are humans, not angels, and we forget. We should be slow to criticize and quick to forgive each other’s faults.

Ok… I’m a few days late getting this post (I saw someone’s response to it, and followed my way back here)

I don’t think that any one is suggesting that talking, even in church, even before mass, is evil.

That’s an unneccessary embellishment.

However, we should be respectful.

Respectful of the PLACE where we are: a church. A Holy and Sacred Place. A place that we can call ‘Holy and Sacred’ because of the way we treat it. We treat it as such because this is where we go to receive the Body and Blood, Soul and Divinity of our Lord, Jesus Christ.

We should be respectful of others there. While you may want to chat with the people that you can call on the phone when you get home, some people like the quiet so that while they are in this Holy and Sacred Place, they my pray in a special way.The church isn’t an arena, or a social hall. It is a House of Worship.

We should respect ourselves. Being in church, esp before mass, allows us to silence our own minds and prepare ourselves to hear the Word of God. How better to prepare ourselves than to be still.

While I’m all for forgiveness, we can’t forgive if we aren’t aware. And we shouldn’t forgive if there is no repentance. And why would one repent if they don’t know that they’ve done anything that is not right? With that in mind, shouldn’t we tell others ‘that was inappropriate’?

I don’t think that’s being judgemental, or even critical. It’s being observant.

This is a hot issue with me. I can’t understand the lack of reverence that so many show for a Catholic Church.

I say that because I have seen people that, when in a Catholic Church, don’t see any need for quiet, but when they visit a Protestant Church, would not be so disrespectful. In fact, they wouldn’t be so disrespectful, or unable to have some degree of quiet, in a restaurant.

Please reconsider. Silence, esp in church, is golden!

 

[Brooklyn]

One of the most special things about the Catholic Church is that Jesus Christ is actually present with us, body, blood soul and divinity, in the Blessed Sacrament. The Protestant Churches do not have that. By doing away with the sacraments, they see everything as a symbol, so being at services does not have the meaning that being at Mass has for a Catholic. Therefore, coming to church services is a much more social event for them. For a Catholic, coming to Mass is literally coming to Calvary, to re-present Christ’s sacrifice. Would you be talking about the week’s events and what you’re going to have for lunch while you’re at Calvary standing at the foot of Christ’s Cross?

When I was a child back in the 60’s, no one ever talked in Church unless they had to, either during Mass or at any other time. If they did talk, it was always in a whisper. That always made it like leaving the earth and entering into the Holy of Holies. It was sacred, unlike any other place on earth. So many Catholic Churches have lost that sense of sacredness, and that is so sad to me.

The Mass is a glorius gift from our Savior. Please think about that, and think about where you are when you come to Mass.

Mary

 

[KatieD]

Beautifully said. I think you summed it up exactly - thank you!

 

[maryjk]

It’s great that people are friendly but you can have a conversation
after Mass, outside.

Its 105 today, outside. And it will be in the 100’s this weekend, outside. We are under a heat advisory.

 

[paramedicgirl]

Its 105 today, outside. And it will be in the 100’s this weekend, outside. We are under a heat advisory.

Sounds like good penance to me!

 

[DJgang]

Before Mass last Saturday, about four women on the back row were chattering away…:hypno: Man, what a flashback!

 

[Lorrie]

Before Mass at my parish you can hear a pin drop it’s so quiet. About a month ago a couple came in and the guy was talking so loud, everyone turned to see what was going on, he abruptly closed his mouth (thank God).

 

[CatholicCajun]

This is a difficult thing for me. At my former parish our Priest tried soooooo hard to get people to be quiet before Mass and he did succeed and then Fr. Joe comes along and all that Father B. fought for went out the window. He has brought in the Rosary before Mass again, which I love the Rosary, but do not feel that it should be prayed before Mass in church. Now at my new parish, there is much visiting with each other before Mass, but one day I obsereved that these people really and truly love and care about each other, it is such a caring community and their talking is usually a low wisper, so not too bad. I just OFFER IT UP when it gets to be too much. God Bless.

 

[Apryl]

He has brought in the Rosary before Mass again, which I love the Rosary, but do not feel that it should be prayed before Mass in church.

Why not?

I know you aren’t supposed to pray the Rosary DURING mass, but what is the problem if it is said before mass?

 

[CatholicCajun]

Why not?

I know you aren’t supposed to pray the Rosary DURING mass, but what is the problem if it is said before mass?

OK, hopefully I won’t be crucified for this. First I love our Lady’s Rosary. But have you ever tried to pray before the Tabernacle before Mass, trying to speak to Jesus and those old ladies are praying as loud as can be and you cannot hear yourself think? That was my point. So I do not want to offend anyone, it’s just my thought.

 

[Apryl]

OK, hopefully I won’t be crucified for this. First I love our Lady’s Rosary. But have you ever tried to pray before the Tabernacle before Mass, trying to speak to Jesus and those old ladies are praying as loud as can be and you cannot hear yourself think? That was my point. So I do not want to offend anyone, it’s just my thought.

I wasn’t offended!

It’s just that I wanted to know… I didn’t know until a few years ago that one shouldn’t pray the Rosary DURING the mass… of course, I didn’t get the Memo until after I tried to say a Rosary during mass.

In my church, there are a few of us that pray the Rosary. I, for one, never want to do it in such a way that those that don’t choose to pray the Rosary may still pray, and not be interrupted.

Right now, no one approaches the Tabernacle to pray before mass. We keep the Rosary to 20 minutes before mass.

I’m not trying to justify our actions, but rather, to ask: is this ok what we are doing?

I didn’t grow up with the Rosary. I’m a Cradle Catholic, but wasn’t introduced to the beauty of the Rosary until I was an adult. As such, there are questions that I never knew to ask.

 

[CatholicCajun]

At our former parish, it started that it was to be prayed and finished 20 minutes before Mass, then they added prayers for the hurricane season, and not just one but two, then they added litanines and by the time they finished the Priest was walking up the isle for Mass, so if you wanted to pray, forget it, my husband likes to meditate on the readings before Mass, but that was impossible with all the voices. So what you are doing is good, real good, because you give the people a chance to pray before Mass starts.