Sins against purity/chasity

[jason3477]

I was wondering, why do a lot of men/young men get sucked into watching porn and hooked???

For me it was becasue my Parents never instructed me about sexuality-and they weren’t practicing catholics…

 

[Castello]

Only a few years ago, in order to access pornography one had to go find it - go to an adult bookstore, to a magazine stand and ask for the magazines that were hidden under the counter, ordering expensive videos by mail order gave way to the local movie rental store that had a “back room” and people were embarrassed to be seen coming in and out of that back room.

Today, almost every American household has a faucet where they can get hot and cold running porn for free 24X7X365 and no one has to know. Heck, if there suddenly popped up a faucet in your bedroom that despensed cocaine the same way, many people would be coke heads.

We have no shame, no sense of sin.

 

[JRKH]

Why smoke? Why Drink? Why drive fast and reckless? Why chase girls for a kiss and whatever…?

Youth - inexperience, exploration, peer pressure, hormones, the rebellious nature of feeling “grown up”…

All of these things play a part.
Yes the activities should be avoided, and each can be addicting, but there is also a “draw” to them that is, at least to a point, virtually irresistible.
Many - in growing up experiment with things and move on. Some get “hooked” and the issues of chastity and purity are some of the more difficult since, for most people “sex” going to be a part of their life.
I mean - one can try smoking and then never smoke again. One can try getting drunk and then never drink again, but for most, sexuality remains a part of their life. One looks for a life mate and sexuality, sexual attraction etc remains a part of that.
It’s a little bit like a person knows they must go on a diet. They may be “Addicted to food” in an unhealthy way but, unlike cigarettes or booze, they can’t “give up” food.

I know this does not give a good clean answer but it’s the best I can do…

Peace
James

 

[Newsy]

I was wondering, why do a lot of men/young men get sucked into watching porn and hooked???

For me it was becasue my Parents never instructed me about sexuality-and they weren’t practicing catholics…

When I was young, it was never addressed. Masturbation was never addressed as wrong, the next step was to porn. It is very available today, society tells us its ok, its a natural progression. Pornography is, by its very nature, addicting. When we sin by seeking our own pleasure, we are never really satisfied. We continue to go a little farther down the path that leads to perdition.

As a society, we have sent the wrong message to young people. As men, we have failed to lead our kids and our families into virtue. If the women in the films were related to us, we would be disgusted and outraged, but we have removed the “person” from the “body”.

Just my :twocents:

Newsy

 

[Hokomai]

Long before human beings evolved, sexual attraction developed among our ancestors.

 

[Nelka]

I was wondering, why do a lot of men/young men get sucked into watching porn and hooked???

For me it was becasue my Parents never instructed me about sexuality-and they weren’t practicing catholics…

It’s easy to find and it is seen as acceptable.

Long before human beings evolved, sexual attraction developed among our ancestors.

:nope: They had pornography did they?

 

[Achilles88]

I became hooked on it for years and knew i was sinning but could not stop. Thankfully after a very good confession over 10 years ago and a lot of prayers i managed to kick satan out of my life forever. Now i can turn my eyes away from any occassion of sin. God is good. Why people get hooked on it I don’t know but i believe peer pressure and the hidden aspects of it. Something to do with knowing it is wrong and taboo. We can only pray.

 

[TheRealJuliane]

With other forms of sin, you aren’t left with visual images burned in your brain forever. For men especially, this is torture, and really interferes with their sexuality, probably for the rest of their lives. For women, we can fantasize about emotional scenarios the way men do about physical parts. Our sexuality is a gift from God and is extremely powerful in our lives. It is meant for marriage, to one person, and not used for perversion or personal gratification. There are lots of sins that we can purge from our lives, porn and masturbation are 2 that fit together and are very, VERY difficult to eradicate.

 

[jason3477]

And it seems like the secular culture here in the USA is gnostic-they disconect the body/sexuality from the soul.

But also, what is the difference between lust and love???

 

[Castello]

And it seems like the secular culture here in the USA is gnostic-they disconect the body/sexuality from the soul.

But also, what is the difference between lust and love???

Lust wants what feels good to me in this life right now.

Love wants what will help the other person get to heaven.

 

[1inICXC]

And it seems like the secular culture here in the USA is gnostic-they disconect the body/sexuality from the soul.

But also, what is the difference between lust and love???

Lust is self seeking- uses a person as an object for personal pleasure

Love is self-giving. 1st seeks the good of the other and sacrifices oneself for the other.

People get hooked on porn because it is ATTRACTIVE and everything else Castello said in his first post.

 

[MidnightSun12]

Masturbation is not taught to be wrong in secular society. It is even taught to be a normal/healthy way to develop as a teenager. In Canada, we are adjusting our curriculum now to teach kids how to masturbate in Grade 6.

I know from my own experience that the fires of lust are difficult to beat with Christ on your side, they’re nearly impossible without him. Imagine how hard it is for a teenage boy who is being told by his teachers that this is ok!!!

Make no mistake, masturbation can not only send you to hell but it can turn this life into a hell also. You will have difficulties meeting and attracting women during courtship since you are unable to project confidence due to the cowardly, selfish act that you are committing. If you ever get married, you will have difficulties maintaining a healthy sexual relationship since you will find that the fantasies and images that you are exposing yourself to are more appealing then is your wife. You will always be drawn toward pornography and you will find out how easy it is to land yourself in trouble at work or even with the law.

Masturbation is possible to beat but you need to stop lust at its source. When you notice yourself being tempted or that you’re starting to feel that dirty, aroused feeling try asking Christ for help immediately. This could be at the mall or when you’re walking to work in the morning and you see a lady walking by who’s dressed immodestly. Just ask Him to take that dirty thought from you and visualize yourself holding it up for Him to take away. You’ll have to do this LOT’s, but once you develop the habit it will become much easier. You may have wet dreams at the beginning but those will go away with time as well (your subconscious needs to get past the misconception that your body actually needs to expell semen from your body when the truth is that your body can just naturally re-absorb the excess back into your blood stream).

You can stop it, I promise! After a 10 year-long chronic masturbation addiction I discovered these forums and I resolved to stop masturbating this past summer. It’s been almost three months since I have masturbated and the temptation isn’t nearly as strong anymore. It gets easier, believe me!

God bless.

 

[admonsta]

I think…

We are fallen. Therefore our flesh is often a stronger motivator than our spirit. If we are not training and strengthening our spirit all the time, then we give our flesh a good chance to win the struggle (CS Lewis says some great stuff about our fallen state - our flesh and spirit should be unified and complimentary, but as it is, there is conflict).

Each of us has our particular struggles of the flesh - whether it is lust, greed, jealousy, laziness, self-loathing or something else. Men have a particular propensity to lust issues, because it’s more in their nature (I dunno, it’s just how I see it).

The devil knows what we struggle with and will take every opportunity to put things in our way to tempt us. To have a thought is not necessarily sinful. It’s what we do with the thought - do we let it linger or do we squash it straight away? Do we act on it? In the heat of the moment, we must rely on the strength of our spirits, because there’s no time to contemplate and weigh up the pro’s and con’s of our actions. We just act. Therefore we should make sure we are strong enough before the temptation is presented.

Also, every time we resist a temptation, I think we get a bit stronger spiritually, and it will be a tiny bit easier next time. Confession gives us sanctifying grace which is God’s way of helping us to grow stronger spiritually and turn more towards Him.

But, in my opinion, the best thing to do is deny the flesh in order to strengthen the spirit, stay close to the sacraments and avoid occasions of sin. The last one is very hard in this world, but even when we mess up, we need to try again, and keep trying until we die.

 

[Paddy1989]

Masturbation and erotica whether it be pornography is something now embraced by the VAST majority of secularist’s as normal. Maybe if sexual image’s weren’t plastered everywhere then it would be easier to avoid, imagine a teenage boy hitting puberty and seeing this. It’s like being hit by a brick wall of temptation, one in which your not used to controlling not to mention that unfortunately the most beautiful women in society whether it be movie’s, music or even out on a night out are mostly dressed and act in a immodest way. Men’s mind’s change therefore on their view woman in general if they become accustomed to this as we already have in society. Therefore look at how attractive that some of the woman are in this industry and you can start to see why. So sad that beauty which is a gift from God is being used in such a destructive way

 

[Jordan719]

I was wondering, why do a lot of men/young men get sucked into watching porn and hooked???

For me it was becasue my Parents never instructed me about sexuality-and they weren’t practicing catholics…

My parents weren’t anything and we were aloud to watch just about anything. I remember watching very inappropriate movies around seven years old.

 

[Hokomai]

:nope: They had pornography did they?

Well, our non-human ancestors created no images of any living thing, but there is evidence from our hon-human relatives that had they been able to do so, yes, they would behave much as we do. :yup: Human sexuality is difficult to manage because much of it is hard-wired in our brains. This is not to say it should not be managed in some ways, but it provides a good answer to the OP.

guardian.co.uk/science/2005/feb/13/research.science

 

[Smugleaf]

With other forms of sin, you aren’t left with visual images burned in your brain forever. For men especially, this is torture, and really interferes with their sexuality, probably for the rest of their lives. For women, we can fantasize about emotional scenarios the way men do about physical parts. Our sexuality is a gift from God and is extremely powerful in our lives. It is meant for marriage, to one person, and not used for perversion or personal gratification. There are lots of sins that we can purge from our lives, porn and masturbation are 2 that fit together and are very, VERY difficult to eradicate.

Women don’t have sexualities, just emotions, then? I don’t understand why so many people here appear to believe only men need or want sex. It amazes me so much more when women say it, too. It perpetuates the stereotype that Catholicism is anti-female-sexuality, even though I don’t believe it is in the way the Church teaches it.

You don’t wonder why the women get sucked in, too?
Or you already know that answer?

This.

 

[Dan_Daly]

Sexual temptations certainly do affect both men and women.

In general they affect men and women differently though. Some women are addicted to pornography. Far more men are. Some men do get wrapped up in self image- obsess about clothes, hair, etc, develop eating disorders, and so on. Far more women do.

Those generalities are true. But as generalities, they are not true for every individual. I don’t think there is any need to assume the OP meant to slight women by not including them in his question. He might simply have been asking about men- nothing wrong with that.

It’s like when people replace words like “brother” with “each other” or “men” with “them” in hymns. It’s just silly. For one thing “men” can mean mankind- men and women. But furthermore, isn’t possible that some songs were simply…written about men? Just as other songs are written about women.

Sins against purity are rampant in our culture- both among men and women. May God have mercy on us all, and may Our Blessed Mother protect us.

Pax Christi

 

[severus68]

Masturbation and erotica whether it be pornography is something now embraced by the VAST majority of secularist’s as normal. Maybe if sexual image’s weren’t plastered everywhere then it would be easier to avoid, imagine a teenage boy hitting puberty and seeing this. It’s like being hit by a brick wall of temptation, one in which your not used to controlling not to mention that unfortunately the most beautiful women in society whether it be movie’s, music or even out on a night out are mostly dressed and act in a immodest way. Men’s mind’s change therefore on their view woman in general if they become accustomed to this as we already have in society. Therefore look at how attractive that some of the woman are in this industry and you can start to see why. So sad that beauty which is a gift from God is being used in such a destructive way

Please do not try to make women responsible for the sin of others/men.

 

[severus68]

Women don’t have sexualities, just emotions, then? I don’t understand why so many people here appear to believe only men need or want sex. It amazes me so much more when women say it, too. It perpetuates the stereotype that Catholicism is anti-female-sexuality, even though I don’t believe it is in the way the Church teaches it.

I wonder about that too. Good post.