L
lovedance4ever
Guest
Hi all! Since Christmas is quickly approaching, a few issues have flared up in my family and I am in need of a bit of advice…
Some of you might know from my past posts that there are “problems” (to say the least) on my dad’s side of the family, specifically with my nana and his one sister. My nana is 88 years old and although she lives alone, her daughters (my aunts, obviously) are constantly in her life…and not always for the better; they are so nasty to her, are demanding of her time and money, and scream at her for little things. It’s horrendous. I just want to crawl in a hole and die when I witness it. One time, my aunt asked my nana to purchase a large package of bottled water for my cousin. Not only did my nana do that, but at 85 years old (at the time), she carried it all the way to the third floor of the dorm…by herself…without the help of my cousin!!!
You see, my father is, to put it plainly, the black sheep of the family. Although I have my disagreements with him, I love him dearly and after what he has pulled through in his life, he is my hero. His father, an alcoholic, left the family when my dad was seven, forcing my nana to go to work. At that young age, he raised, and I mean raised his two baby sisters all on his own. He cooked and cleaned the house, picked them up from school, and took care of their needs, all while my nana scrubbed toilets for 25 cents an hour.
When he was 18, he got his girlfriend pregnant, and wanted to do the honorable thing by marrying her. They did, but soon after, she cheated on him and wanted a divorce - he also discovered that while he was on the road working, she was physically abusive to my sister, as well. After the divorce, my daddy worked full time as a truck driver, while caring for my sister to the best of his abilities…completely alone. His mother changed the locks on him at the request of his sisters, and he ended up having to live in a rat and bug infested, condemned apartment with my sister. But he fought, even though he wanted to die…my dad, my hero, never gave up.
I felt the need to give some history before addressing this current problem. He has remained a good son to my nana throughout all of these trials. He calls her on the phone everyday, and is at her home in a heartbeat when she needs something fixed. Regardless of his faithfulness and love, she abuses him verbally. His youngest sister is and has always been very spoiled by my nana; she gives my cousins EVERYTHING they want, and favors them. Personally, I do not care if she does not give me anything. I just want to be loved…she is my only living grandparent.
So here we are, four days before Christmas. My dad does not want to go to my nana’s home for the Christmas Eve celebration to avoid conflict. However, today my nana specifically asked me if I would come. Even though she abuses me, I still love and respect her…her life was not peaches and cream either. But the dilemma is…do I disrespect my nana and not go solely to appease my dad? I am 100% on my father’s side, but…what if this is her last Christmas? Will it hurt my dad?
Finally, I am asking for prayers to heal this somewhat broken family. My cousins are not practicing Catholics, but my nana and aunts are, as are my parents and myself. Please pray that God helps us all through this pain - especially my father. He truly is a hero in every essence of the word. I do not think I would have the strength or will to do what he did - my sister lived a good life because of the sacrifices he made. So during this holiday season, please pray that he is able to overcome the wounds inflicted on him by his family. He suffers from severe depression, especially around Christmas time…all the old feelings re-surface.
God bless,
Christa
Some of you might know from my past posts that there are “problems” (to say the least) on my dad’s side of the family, specifically with my nana and his one sister. My nana is 88 years old and although she lives alone, her daughters (my aunts, obviously) are constantly in her life…and not always for the better; they are so nasty to her, are demanding of her time and money, and scream at her for little things. It’s horrendous. I just want to crawl in a hole and die when I witness it. One time, my aunt asked my nana to purchase a large package of bottled water for my cousin. Not only did my nana do that, but at 85 years old (at the time), she carried it all the way to the third floor of the dorm…by herself…without the help of my cousin!!!
You see, my father is, to put it plainly, the black sheep of the family. Although I have my disagreements with him, I love him dearly and after what he has pulled through in his life, he is my hero. His father, an alcoholic, left the family when my dad was seven, forcing my nana to go to work. At that young age, he raised, and I mean raised his two baby sisters all on his own. He cooked and cleaned the house, picked them up from school, and took care of their needs, all while my nana scrubbed toilets for 25 cents an hour.
When he was 18, he got his girlfriend pregnant, and wanted to do the honorable thing by marrying her. They did, but soon after, she cheated on him and wanted a divorce - he also discovered that while he was on the road working, she was physically abusive to my sister, as well. After the divorce, my daddy worked full time as a truck driver, while caring for my sister to the best of his abilities…completely alone. His mother changed the locks on him at the request of his sisters, and he ended up having to live in a rat and bug infested, condemned apartment with my sister. But he fought, even though he wanted to die…my dad, my hero, never gave up.
I felt the need to give some history before addressing this current problem. He has remained a good son to my nana throughout all of these trials. He calls her on the phone everyday, and is at her home in a heartbeat when she needs something fixed. Regardless of his faithfulness and love, she abuses him verbally. His youngest sister is and has always been very spoiled by my nana; she gives my cousins EVERYTHING they want, and favors them. Personally, I do not care if she does not give me anything. I just want to be loved…she is my only living grandparent.
So here we are, four days before Christmas. My dad does not want to go to my nana’s home for the Christmas Eve celebration to avoid conflict. However, today my nana specifically asked me if I would come. Even though she abuses me, I still love and respect her…her life was not peaches and cream either. But the dilemma is…do I disrespect my nana and not go solely to appease my dad? I am 100% on my father’s side, but…what if this is her last Christmas? Will it hurt my dad?
Finally, I am asking for prayers to heal this somewhat broken family. My cousins are not practicing Catholics, but my nana and aunts are, as are my parents and myself. Please pray that God helps us all through this pain - especially my father. He truly is a hero in every essence of the word. I do not think I would have the strength or will to do what he did - my sister lived a good life because of the sacrifices he made. So during this holiday season, please pray that he is able to overcome the wounds inflicted on him by his family. He suffers from severe depression, especially around Christmas time…all the old feelings re-surface.
God bless,
Christa
). It’s your Dad, and someday, when he’s gone, you’ll be glad you honored your father and you’re keeping the commandment, which would be the priority. So, you’re still a minor - under 18? Have you thought about talking over a little more with your dad your wanting to see Grandma on Christmas Eve? Perhaps after he’s sober, and has just eaten his dinner 
. Maybe he will agree to let you go and bring her your present and visit for an hour or two. You’re a kind person to ask for prayers for your family. I’ll pray for you guys this Christmas. Merry Christmas!