Something I Can't Understand

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CaptainPrudeman

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I honestly don’t get it. I’m a prude through and through; porn disgusts me, discussing graphic sex disgusts me, masturbation disgusts me. But I still struggle with masturbating. I started at 12 and by the time I learned it was a mortal sin, I was in too deep. I’ve been able to drastically reduce it but ever so often it’ll happen. I’ll be screaming at myself to stop but it’s like I can’t control my body anymore. Afterwards I’ll feel terrible but I can’t find a way to stop it. I’m starting to fear being anywhere close to nude because I’m afraid it’ll happen. I pray every morning and night, along with a daily Chaplet of Divine Mercy, and it’s the only mortal sin I commit. Why can’t I stop?
 
The human condition is bizarre. What you desire and what your body desires are two very different things. We’re constantly fighting with ourselves and this is a direct result of Original Sin. Praying is good but this is a physical affliction that requires avoiding triggers and taking cold showers. Just keep dragging yourself along! Maybe when you’re 80 the urges will lessen…
 
Problem is that I can avoid the triggers as long as I don’t ever have my pants off, but everything is a trigger for me.
 
@Capta(name removed by moderator)rudeman

Meditate on these words of the Apostle:

For we know that the law is spiritual, but I am of the flesh, sold under sin. For I do not understand my own actions. For I do not do what I want, but I do the very thing I hate. Now if I do what I do not want, I agree with the law, that it is good. So now it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells within me. For I know that nothing good dwells in me, that is, in my flesh. For I have the desire to do what is right, but not the ability to carry it out. For I do not do the good I want, but the evil I do not want is what I keep on doing. Now if I do what I do not want, it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells within me.
 
Should I talk to the priest about this when I go to confession on Saturday?
 
It’s a thorn in your side to test you. Do your best but keep in mind you’ll fall often :confused:
 
What’s worse is I’m trying to live a holy life so that one of my closest friends might see God through me. I not only let down God by my sin, but I let her down as well. It hurts tremendously.
 
This is a private sin. If you sit out communion it’s nobody’s business. We’re not perfect and we shouldn’t put ourselves on a pedestal. See a priest and go to confession monthly. Don’t burn yourself out! You’re not gonna outrun this temptation. It’s about resolving to be better, accepting your cross, and keep plodding along.
 
Well, I wouldn’t walk up to a friend and say what sin I’m up to… How would they know your sin? They can’t read souls… I would be more concerned with your own salvation versus what your friend perceives. Your friend is better off reading the lives of the saints.
 
I’m young and my parents aren’t exactly gung-ho about following the faith. To do so would be incredibly embarrassing and wouldn’t lead to much.
 
I suppose, but I’m just worried I’m not living like I should if I’m seemingly addicted to a sin. Also, I couldn’t care less about myself if she’s still agnostic. My own salvation is second to hers in my mind.
 
Capta(name removed by moderator)rudeman said:
I suppose, but I’m just worried I’m not living like I should if I’m seemingly addicted to a sin.
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Welcome to Life! We’re all struggling. You could definitely be in worse shape.
Capta(name removed by moderator)rudeman said:
Also, I couldn’t care less about myself if she’s still agnostic. My own salvation is second to hers in my mind.
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I had a Catholic friend who became agnostic. We discussed religion and he eventually wanted nothing to do with me. Your friend is free to do as she wishes. Spending an inordinate amount of time converting someone can actually drive them away. You only have control over your own salvation.
 
I know, but I can’t stand knowing her soul is destined for hell. It’s hard to think about and I feel obligated to help. She’s expressed openness to it, it’s just the whole “getting her there” part with logic. I just know logic isn’t enough always.
 
I’m concerned that you seem to think that being a prude would help you resist temptation. Being a prude simply indicates that you have an unhealthy relationship with the fact that human beings are sexual. That won’t help you responsibly embody your own sexual nature.
 
It isn’t to help me resist, I’m just disgusted by the perversion of sex in culture. I think martial sex is one of the most beautiful things in existence, but if it’s unholy it disgusts me.
 
It’s something I’m called, and in a general sense it’s true
 
You probably got addicted…
Anyhow, you say you say a daily chaplet of Divine mercy, what about saying a daily Rosary?

Perhaps if being naked is your trigger, then avoid being naked unless you take a bath. Prepare to say prayers in the bath tub/shower, like some of the Rosary.

Confess it and know that all your sins are forgiven, gone, you are a new person. No need to go back.
 
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