Son wants to wear chapel veil

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Yes, historically. Women always kept their hats on indoors when visiting or in public (not wanting to mess up their hair plus the holding of these sometimes very voluminous hats would make them awkward to carry). So the rule was women kept their hats on and men ALWAYS took their hats off indoors, especially in houses of worship and of course when greeting a lady.
 
HumblePilgrim said:
There is so much vitriol in this thread. I thought I was speaking to Traditional Catholics who this is a custom being primarily revived by them. I’m sorry for causing the drama.
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I wouldn’t pay too much attention to that. Some people like to argue. We go over this one at least once a week around here.

(If it helps, I’ve been seriously considering restarting my personal practice of covering my head. I think I’d probably just confuse people if I showed up with a mantilla though - you don’t exactly see jeans, short cropped hair, and a mantilla together much.)
 
Mintaka said:
Actually, in many parts of the US, older women
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Yes, I specifically noted that senior citizens still continued to do it. I could go today or any time in the last 50 years into any number of churches in any Midwest or East Coast city and find old ethnic women who never stopped doing it.

I’m talking about people in their teens, 20s, 30s and 40s.
 
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LadyLillian said:
It’s normally disrespectful for women to cover their heads indoors as well,
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Not during the 20th century, ever. Women in North America and in at least some parts of Europe kept their hats on when visiting in others’ homes, when in church, when eating lunch out. You can see this in about 10000 old movies. The only exceptions were for formal evening wear, when she might wear a tiara or some sort of hair decoration instead of a hat.
 
HumblePilgrim said:
There is so much vitriol in this thread. I thought I was speaking to Traditional Catholics who this is a custom being primarily revived by them. I’m sorry for causing the drama.
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We’re an easily distracted bunch. 😐

I think some other posters made some fair points about just veiling anyway and firmly telling your son, “No.” Honestly, it’s going to depend on your son’s temperament and level of sensitivity. Maybe that will work for him. You’ll have to discern what will work best.

This is a place for discussing “Traditional Catholicism,” but that doesn’t mean all posters would self-describe as “Traditional Catholics.” So, yes, there are going to be disagreements. Some of those have taken the discussion a bit off your original question. Alas, these things happen.
 
I’m totally stealing “Mantilla Madness” the next time someone starts a topic on “veiling” and knowing CAF that will be in approximately… :(name removed by moderator)uts dates: :adjusts dials: …2 days.
 
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Explain to him the outward differences between boys and girls, and make it clear veils are for women and girls, perhaps give him something special only or mostly only boys do or use to help him feel unique
 
As long as women like consensus dressing (and consensus in lots of other things), there will be contentiousness in any fashion thread. We are the sex that goes to the bathroom in groups and stares into mirrors, secretly giving upchecks and downchecks to all the other ladies who are secretly doing the same thing.

It’s a good thing there wasn’t an Internet for house decoration back in the day, or there would have been blood. 🙂
 
It’s unfortunate for the women who humbly and piously wish to wear (and discuss their reasons for wearing) head coverings that they should be so criticized (subtly or not). And yet there are those who ask for it when they imply criticism towards those who do not wish to wear head coverings. The problem is, often when it comes to dress, subtext is rife with criticism and/or read into.
 
Well, I know I’m really in the minority here, but I can assure you, I’m not a vile or hateful person. Still, I find women who wear a head covering in church, other than a modest hat, prideful. I think they want to say, “Hey, look at me. I’m holier than you are.” They have to know they are drawing attention. Second, I think it just looks silly in the US in 2018. (I realize it might be the norm in countries like Spain and Italy, where I’ve seen women wearing the lace mantillas.) It’s not the custom in the US, however. I don’t mind seeing some very elderly women wearing them, though none at my parish do.

Still, it’s not a crime or a sin, and, though I can’t help having negative feelings, I try not to judge the women who want to cover their head. It is, after all, their choice.

But I still think one’s son is far more important than indulging the urge to cover one’s head, when covering one’s head is unnecessary and not the norm in the US today.

Edit: I should have said the above was my emotional reaction. I don’t judge any woman who covers her head or pretend to know what she thinks. I know enough to realize my emotional responses aren’t always right.
 
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You could get a cute hat with flowers on it; maybe your son would then understand that it’s a “girl’s hat”. Boys don’t wear hats with flowers.​

(Incidentally, when my nephew was very little, he put earrings on because he noticed my aunt doing it. His father had a fit!) These were regular clip-on earrings which young men do not wear although they wear studs in their ears.
 
I think a hat is a good idea. Flowers on it would be fine. Even a suede sort of beret would work and not get in the way of other parishioners. Most women don’t wear hats, but some do. It wouldn’t draw attention unless it looked like something worn by the British royalty. (No offense meant to the British royalty, I know outlandish hats are just a part of their fashion culture.)
 
When did it become disrespectful for women to wear hats indoors?? Women used to wear hats to all sorts of occasions, weddings, teas, etc.
 
Not to mention colonial times in the US as well as the Enlightenment and the Industrial Age eras in Europe; mob caps, lace caps, turbans of silk; bonnets in the pioneer U.S., bows, boaters (straw hats), leghorn hats (turn of the century 19th/20th), the cloche hats of the flappers, the Buck Rogers ‘space age’ hats of the 30s, the man-tailored Hepburn fedoras of the 40s, the pillbox of the 50s and 60s; and going back the wimples, hennins, Juliet caps, of the 12th-15th centuries; not to mention our neighbors to the South with the rebozos, mantillas; various shawls worn over the head throughout the ages. . . And even after the 1970s and 80s love affair first with the Age of Aquarius women and the Fro for men, followed by 'big hair out to there", by the 1990s women and men nearly always have a ballcap on their heads. (And don’t let’s even go to last year’s ‘pink hat’ which ruined one of my cute knit hat patterns for that color at least).
 
Well, I do enjoy wearing my mantilla to Mass. I would feel naked without it. It makes me feel more focused on Christ, more humble, more reverent. After all, I am going to be in His Presence in His House.

For many years, I was the only one in my parish to wear any kind of head covering. Of course, our priest was thrilled to see me wearing it. His eyes would light up like Christmas. Oh, how it warmed my heart seeing that light…

Those who didn’t know my name would refer to me as “the girl in the mantilla.” It definitely opened the door to conversation. Many thought I was a convert to the faith. Nope. Born and bred and Confirmed in the Catholic Church at age 7. I just took everything Catholic seriously and reverently. Still do.

For me, it is an honor to be Catholic. I want to reflect Him inside and out.
 
ConstantLearner said:
Well, I know I’m really in the minority here, but I can assure you, I’m not a vile or hateful person. Still, I find women who wear a head covering in church, other than a modest hat, prideful. I think they want to say, “Hey, look at me. I’m holier than you are.”
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I’m not saying that doesn’t happen. But I personally know about half a dozen ladies who wear head coverings to Mass. Not a single one of them is saying hey, look at me, I’m holier than you. Not one.
 
I get a kick out of how British royalty wear their hats. They look great in them. Maybe they will set a trend, especially Kate. I always loved hats but of course I don’t wear them anymore, unless it’s cold out. I have a faux fur hat if it gets cold and windy, but I haven’t worn it in years.

The trend right now is so casual that many people don’t even dress up to go to church anymore.

I remember the headbands they used to have (maybe they still do) with ribbons and flowers on them, and sometimes a short veil. Those would be easy to make. They have the materials at craft stores.
 
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